I just broke up with my boyfriend after 2 years. He was my first love, but for some reason as hard I as tried, we just didn't work out. We might have worked out right now, but in the long run, we both knew it probably wouldnt work. It has only been 2 days, and I can't stop thinking about him! I want to call him, or go see him..and say "I am sorry, lets get back together. I was wrong, and I love you." Is this normal? I want him back in my arms but deep down know its not right. I know I have to get over this...but it's so hard. How long does it take to get over someone? Will I ever be that comfortable with someone else again?
2007-03-11 03:30:50 · 13 answers · asked by Vogue143 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Why won't it work? Examine the reasons why you can't be together, and decided for yourself whether or not it really IS posible for you to be together. If you find that it isn't, then at least you will have found a good reason why you can't, and that will make it a little bit easier for you.
Yes, this is normal. And yes, if you try, you WILL feel that comfortable with somebody else, but you need to be sure that this is NOT going to work. Because if there's any doubt in your mind it will make things that much harder.
2007-03-11 03:38:52 · answer #1 · answered by JaniesTiredShoes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only two days! Of course you still miss him and you're second guessing yourself, even though you say it wouldn't have worked out, because you're out of your comfort zone right now. Sometimes it takes a few years to totally put your feelings in perspective, especially when its a real first love, BUT you don't have to be miserable in the process. Believe it or not, it gets a little easier with each passing day, once you fully resolve not to call him and back pedal on your decision.I don't think it necessary to ever forget him; remember the sweet things about him fondly, but don't forget the reasons that led you to break up. Write 'em down if you have to, and don't call him in a moment's weakness just because he's familiar. You will find someone else , probably much sooner that you expect. Enjoy your life in the meantime. You're going through grief process right now; the end of a real relationship is significant and you do have have to bury some hopes and dreams and plans, but go forward, there are other hidden treasures out there to discover.
2007-03-11 03:45:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's always hard to get over your first love. your instincts about it not working in the long run are probably right. until you have relationships with many different people, you will have nothing to compare him to. for 2 years, you've put all of you into the relationship, so now that you're no longer doing that, there's a big emptiness and getting back to him would be the quick fix, but not really the right one. so, accept the emptiness, mourn a bit for the lost relationship and then go out and make a new one.
2007-03-11 03:41:16 · answer #3 · answered by billyjoemikey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The "first love" is always memorable because it opens us to the beauty of our own hearts. There we find this vast kingdom of love, compassion, kindness that we bestow on our Beloved...and yet also in the heart is our shadows...our anger, our jealousy, our envy..etc that we also bestow on our Beloved..:)
Usually why people break up is because they simply cannot drop the projection. The projection is taking a part of yourself that is your issue, that you do not like about yourself and pointing at your partner and saying it is their issue, when in reality it is yours. I can tell you this. When you fall in love again, you will notice some of the same "stuff" in your next relationship. However, if you have reflected and contemplated your own "issues" then you will attract someone that reflects your growth. You will project less. Every love relationship is frought with highs and lows...but they cannot be emmense "swings" to survive. They have to be smaller, more manageable cycles. So that is why it is hard to let go. The love, the passion, coupled with the problems...inevitably if too large, leads to isolation.
You will love again. If your heart says move on to the next lesson, and phase of your life, honor it. Do not run from your pain. Feel it fully. It does not mean you are weak. It will make you stronger.
2007-03-11 03:45:24 · answer #4 · answered by Suzanne 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sometimes never. you really dont have to completely get over him... its good to remember what you learned, the good things and bad and use what you learned for the next relationship.
you are normal... ive been in the same position. the longing for him will go away. you might still think about him every now and then, but it won't be in a bad way or make you totally break down. hopefully the bad/upset feelings will go away for ya soon. get out and hang with your girlfriends! ... summer is just around the corner and thats a perfect time to be single! :)
2007-03-11 03:36:23 · answer #5 · answered by avita81 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I still think about my first love...it is many, many years later...
The first love is one you will always remember, and you will always look back on it and compare all relationships to it. No matter if it was a good relationship or not so good. The reason for this is because it is exactly that, YOUR FIRST LOVE, and it will remain imbibed in your mind forever..You will get over the hurt, but the memories will always be there for you...
2007-03-11 03:36:33 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Minnie Mouse♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
6 months 12 days 7 hours
2007-03-11 03:34:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes you will get over him and you will feel comfortable with another guy,you never forget your first love,i split with my first love about 4 years ago but when i think of him i just remember the good times we had,im totaly over him as i never see him but if i did see him i know there wouldnt be any feelings there or maybe there would but i would never get back with him
2007-03-11 03:37:20 · answer #8 · answered by DREAMER 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think of love as the swing of a pickaxe into the floor of your bedroom. It leaves holes, but you can go around them, but make too many and your stuck.
Its hard getting over your first love.
2007-03-11 03:36:19 · answer #9 · answered by Jeff 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u deinfitely will find someone else again, it's just a matter of time...
well, u know 'the first cut is the deepest'... it depends on the person in taking how much time to recover...
well, for me, luckily... it's just like a week or so lol
2007-03-11 03:35:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋