2007-03-11 01:54:04 · 22 answers · asked by Éleanore Amour♥ 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
I'm the babysitter
2007-03-11 03:52:16 · update #1
At this age children still don't comprehend that you're coming back home to them. Just contuinue to leave and say you'll be back. When you come back they'll act like they never thought they'll see you again but after 2 they realize that it's NOT the end of the world and you WILL be back. It's 100% normal for a child to do this.
Well since your the babysitter try to distract the child and hope s/he doesn't think about his mom/dad for that time. Usually if you can preoccupy a child's mind then it's easier. They will continue to still cry sometimes and may even ask for mommy but simply say mommy went to work. She will be back later. I promise. Then the child will get preoccupied with something and see that you were right after their mommy comes back. Like I said eventually they'll comprehend that mommy WILL come back. Good luck!
2007-03-11 03:48:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
WOW I guess cassandra (a poster above) has no clue! A baby actually grows socially from being away from their parents. They get to have experiences they would never have with mommy and daddy. Who can really be with their child 24/7? Do they go to the bathroom with you? Bathe with you? Sleep with you? I think parents do need some time away from their children. It helps the parents keep their relationship healthy. I'm not saying that you should leave your children constantly with daycare. My husband and I fo out for dinner every two weeks, but other than that I am a stay-at-home mom. Some people don't have the luxury of staying home and that should not make them feel guilty. As for the separation anxiety, try leaving your child for a minute or so by themself (playing in their room) and make a big deal when you come back. Increase the time by another minute or so and hopefully it will help your child understand that you will come back. There are times when all parents have to be away from their kids for some reason.
Good luck...thank goodness separation anxiety is just a stage that will pass!
ADDED:According to thomas j below we should all just not bathe(because that might be 10 minutes that we're not with our child), never let our children out of sight. What about the single mothers who have to work to be able to feed their children? Should their kids be taken away because in your mind they're not good mothers? I know many children who have went to day care and have turned out just fine without constantly being with their mothers. The website you referenced seems to me to be very narrow minded. Time out is frowned upon? How do you discipline your child? or do you at all?
2007-03-11 03:40:16 · answer #2 · answered by abc 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I do not know if this will help... as I a mum and working full time..
My two year since he was one year he goes to childcare and everytime I leave the room he cries... the first couple of times is hard and I stay there for a while but then afterwards, I decided to leave him crying and go...
The childcare people told me that he usally cry for say 1 to 2 minutes and they he go and play with toys ... so in a way he is testing you to see if you come back for him or her if he or she cry so leave it and evently he/she will stop doing it as they know it won't work.
2007-03-11 03:59:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
When I watched my friends child, he cried, and the parents didn't want to go then, I told them just to go, he will be okay, after they left he kept crying. let the child cry, eventually he will stop when he realizes that they are not coming back right away. One time he cried so long he fell a sleep in his bed.
2007-03-11 05:27:18 · answer #4 · answered by misty blue 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you have to get him used to having you come back so he doesn't worry.. he is at a stage where kids get really clingy and he just needs to be reassured that you will come back
when you leave tell him mom or dad will be home in an hour and even though he can't tell time he has a time to expect you.. so it tells him you will be back.. try a few minutes at a time...leave and come back
but if that is not the reason... How does he get along with the person you leave him with? Are they hurting him?
2007-03-11 01:59:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them you will be back soon. Make no fuss and dont come back just because they are crying because they will expect that to work everytime if u do it once, which will only make things worse. try to leave for short amount of time and then gradually make it a little longer each time. praise ur child when he/she is settled well wen u have left.
2007-03-11 03:11:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
thomas j is right on. Keep telling yourself people that you aren't damaging your children when you just let them cry........this society is seriously messed up. These are children with brains that aren't fully developed yet. Not little adults.
Parents if you really want to raise happy and healthy individuals - do some research. A good book to start with is "Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason" by Alfie Kohn, it's on amazon
2007-03-11 07:58:35 · answer #7 · answered by junenorth 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When babies stop crying at day care, it's not because they don't want their mommy. It's because they've given up. They've learned - mommy ain't coming. Mommy doesn't care. Mommy isn't trusthworthy.
ABC, it's not elementary. 18 months olds do not 'grow socially' from being at day care. They are incapable of that, because their needs are still for mommy. It's like saying a tender seed benefits from being outside. Well, after it's sprouted and hardened off, yes. Before, no. Before, deadly.
Infants and toddlers need their mothers. Period. Just because so many human mommies are apparently not up to being good moms anymore doesn't change what human infants and toddlers need.
This is not "Cassandra's opinion." For god's sake, the psychological research on the needs of infants and toddlers and the damage done to them by separation from mommy is extensive and almost a century old.
Parents who pretend their infants and toddlers need other kids are lying to themselves and hurting their kids. They need mommy.
2007-03-11 04:03:39 · answer #8 · answered by t jefferson 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I am a in home daycare provider and mother of 3 and I am here to tell you that this is more upsetting for you then your child. Most of the time they cry because they think they will get their way with you and you will not leave them. You are gone less then 2 minutes and they have stopped crying and are playing with the other children. It is harder for us. We feel like they are abandoning them, and in the meantime they are playing, eating, sleeping, and just as content as can be. ou are a good mom for being so concerned. Good Luck & God Bless!
2007-03-11 03:05:37 · answer #9 · answered by armiwife 1 · 3⤊ 2⤋
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2016-10-01 22:39:38 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋