Every night after dinner, Merle took off for the local watering hole. He would
spend the whole evening there and always arrive home, quite inebriated, around
midnight each night.
He usually had trouble getting his key to fit the keyhole and couldn't get the
door open. And every time this happened, his wife would go to the door and let
him in. Then she would proceed to yell and scream at him, for his constant
nights out and always coming home in a drunken state. But Merle just continued
his nightly routine.
One day, the wife was talking to a friend about her husband's behavior and was
particularly distraught by it all.
The friend listened and said, "Why don't you treat him a little differently
when he comes home? Instead of berating him, why don't you give him some loving
words and welcome him home with a kiss? Then he might change his ways."
The wife thought that this might be a good idea.
That night, Merle took off again after dinner. And at about
2007-03-11 01:45:53 · 19 answers · asked by Lucky Cat 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
midnight, he
arrived home in his usual condition.
His wife heard him at the door. She quickly opened it and let Merle in.
Instead of berating him as she had always done, this time she took his arm and
led him into the living room. She sat Merle down in an easy chair, put his feet
up on the ottoman, and took his shoes off. Then she went behind him and started
to cuddle him a little. After a little while, she said to Merle, "It's pretty
late, dear. I think we had better go upstairs to bed now, don't you think."
At that, in his inebriated state he replied, "I guess we might as well. I'll
get in trouble when I get home anyway!"
2007-03-11 01:46:04 · update #1
I liked it LMAO, and I gave you a star
2007-03-11 01:57:12 · answer #1 · answered by Kizzy_ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gd one! Here is an exchange.
THE MIRACLE OF TOILET PAPER
> Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror, complaining to my
> husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of automatically telling me
> it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion:
> "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet
> paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."
> Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and I stand in
> front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this
> take?" I ask.
> "They will grow larger over a period of years," he replies.
> I stop. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my
> breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?"
> Without missing a beat he says, "Worked for your butt, didn't it?"
> He's still alive, and with a great deal of physical therapy, he may even
> walk again. Stupid, stupid man.
>
2007-03-11 04:15:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
not bad!4 out of 6
2007-03-11 01:52:49 · answer #3 · answered by vinni 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good One!
2007-03-11 01:51:42 · answer #4 · answered by 63vette 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nice 1 lol
2007-03-11 01:50:01 · answer #5 · answered by magiclady2007 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol i liked that 1
2007-03-11 04:28:06 · answer #6 · answered by Victoria 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol lol 6/10
2007-03-11 01:54:44 · answer #7 · answered by amie f 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good one.
2007-03-11 01:49:50 · answer #8 · answered by Finbarr D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol, 8/10
2007-03-11 01:55:41 · answer #9 · answered by Buffy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL.
Thanks for the laugh!
2007-03-13 11:23:45 · answer #10 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋