Mature guys: would you touch her on the first night out?

Question

If you don't, why? because you respect her, don't dare to or it's just not right?

when do you start touching? holding hands?

If he didn't touch me at all, is he not interested? But he asked me out again.

Answer 1

you may never want or need him to touch you,be clear in what you want from your relationship then take yourself there........

Answer 2

Hi, I'm sorry that I'm not a Guy but, I just saw your question and wanted to give you my opinion. I hope that you don't mind. I've been giving advice almost my whole life. All of my friends call me "Dear Apey" and have always told me that I should "WRITE" my advice. I have published work in an Editor's Choice Series, as well as in a CD series. It's a little different from giving advice but, I love it just the same. In addition to that, I have also counseled many, many, women, teens, husbands/wifes, boyfriends/girlfriends, and third parties to relationships, re: many facets of life, difficult choices and decisions. I, in turn, learned something special from each and every case file and individual. I am also a Very PROUD single mom of two. My oldest "SON" will be 19 this month and my youngest "SON" will be 15 in June. Soooooo, anyway..... I'll take my friends' advice, friends of 36 of my 39 years of age mind you, { I'd rather keep the age part quiet, ha! ha! ha! } and just GO FOR IT ! So........., here we go! I "FEEL" that the "guy" you went out with DOES like you and I also "FEEL" that he is very much RESPECTING you. I truely hope that this IS the case and he is not just trying to play you. If this were true, I do believe that you would " FEEL IT" in your GUT ! You are a WOMAN, follow your INSTINKS! Good luck and always remember, " If it Doesn't "FEEL" Right, then it Probably Isn't." NEVER put up with ABUSE in ANY, and I MEAN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM ! ! ! ; Verbally, Emotionally, or Physically !!! { I did that for 12 years, how incredably STUPID was that? } Hind sight is definately 20/20 !!!!! I have learned and grown a lot from my experiences in life and I am grateful for each and every one of them. I am not bitter at all, I am Blessed. Good Luck! Always trust in your heart and soul and follow your instinks, no matter where they may lead you. It will most certainly be in the right direction! GLA's, APEY P.S. Plz listen to what a lot of these "Gentlemen" have to say. Some of them are giving you some really great advice! (GLA's = Good Luck Always!)

Answer 3

Believe it or not, there are still a few "gentlemen" alive and kicking out there. There is the off-hand chance that you have encountered one of them. In this day and age of sexual promiscuity, consider yourself blessed to have spent an evening with a guy who had interest in you other than what was concealed by clothing. If he asked you out again, then he IS interested. It may be another date or two and a little help from you before he feels that its the right time for touching.

Personally, I was never one to make the first move. If the girl makes the first move then its a sign that she is interested. It takes the pressure off the guy, since he won't feel any rejection after the ice is broken.

Take your time, and hopefully something truly great can develop between you two. Best of luck in your quest to find mr right... you're off to a good start.

Answer 4

Touching on the first date is never a good idea. The first date kind of establishes "settings" for the potential relationship. If a guy were to touch a girl on the first date, the girl would more than likely suspect that he's more of a physical guy than an emotional guy. Depending on what YOUR priorities are, that might be acceptable, but of the girls I've talked to and counseled, about 80% of them are more inclined to pursue a guy who has better conversational skills than sexual or seductive skills. Of course, those things have their own place with their own importance...but that's not until WELL after the first meet.

Touching, in my opinion, should only begin after a relationship has officially been established -- maybe JUST before such establishment even, if the relationship is started with a kiss or a hug. It should start off mellow: holding hands, occasional pecks or even the rare kiss are a good set of actions to conform to at first. As feelings develop and thoughts of extended relationships and/or marriage begin to arise, it only becomes more appropriate to advance the level of physicality. I'm saying, later in the relationship, it IS ethical to advance the "touchy-feeliness."

Sex or anything closely related to sex should only be shared between two individuals after marriage, in my opinion. In this way, you are more committed to your partner than if you were to have sex outside of marriage; you will have more success raising a family and prolonging your marriage as well.

Hope this helped.

Answer 5

to touch is a strong thing tho we dont think of it that way try to hold hands a peck on the cheek goodnight letting her know u are interested but dont go much further if she wants you to touch more she will reach out for you to touch her and why u ask it is called being a gentleman for example if u see a really cool old car out in the lot do u rush up and touch all over it ? no if the owner is by the car u ask she is the owner of her body and u need permission first!

Answer 6

you should be a little more specific about (touching) it has a lot of different meanings...holding hands is normal on a first date..if he didnt touch you, it was respect for you.. and he also asked you out again.. so you are doing ok.

Answer 7

Stop worrying so much. A guy wouldn't ask you out again if he didn't like you. End of story. It is when he is too eager to touch you that you should worry.

As per your question (if I am to be considered mature), no. Out of respect.

Answer 8

I've never been one to rush the "touching" thing when dating anyone. I tend to have some respect for the ladies that i date. I've always found it much more rewarding to get to know each other alot better, and are comfortable with each other, then when we do touch it's like some sort of "electrifying" sensation that really blow's the mind.

Answer 9

personally, i'm a male, & i'd touch 'er on the 1st nite, 2nd, yada yada yada, catch my drift?? i always test the "waters" - i go as far as only i'm allowed - with "respect" of course. all of "us" want to touched as an end result, some "maybe" just sooner than others - per the individual. there is no "time frame" for touching, just whenever one's "comfy" when it's being done(that again can vary per the individual). asking u out "again" (to me) constitutes being touched. obviously "u" touched him internally (if u will) by wanting to go out again, this time,apparently since u want to be touched, u initiate contact! let'em know it's okay, go from there & have "fun" with it!!!

Answer 10

holding hands is ok but touching i would wait just for a few dates because i show her respect.

Answer 11

if I was interested in her as a person and wanted to have our relationship "go somewhere" maybe,..then no..Id wait til she indicated she was interested...you could hold her hand on the first meeting if the moment seemed right..every person and relationship is different and starts different...you have to wing it....but there is nothing wrong with being polite and being a gentleman...Ive never known that to hurt anyone....