I have a strong faith in God. I will not, under no circumstances, take God's name in vain. Tonight my 17 yr old daughter got mad at me and said "OH my F------g God!". When I asked her to do something for me. She doesn't help around the house on a daily basis and I take care of her 3 month old son so she can stay in school. It took a lot of will power on my part not to smack her.
2007-03-10 17:02:41 · 40 answers · asked by kitkat1640 6 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
ONLY because of the American Child Protection agencies, have I not followed "Spare the rod, you spoil the child". And she knows how I feel and believe, because I brought her up in the church to. She has chosen not to follow God. But that does not call for her to be so disrespectful.
2007-03-10 17:16:22 · update #1
I think it would be more beneficial to locate the source of her frustration. It could be that she feels overwhelmed with a child, the future commitment of a child, school studies and the teenage pressures of her peers. This may subconciously instil the belief that domestic chores are not important in this context.. It would be best to lead by example as a christian and to teach love, strength and understanding, not to create resentment and rebellion. Teenagers quite often feel misunderstood especially sometimes with christian parents where they may feel that christian values are not applicable in their world. It may be an idea to connect, show understanding and the importance of responsiblity that will serve in her interest and guide her throughout life, rather than an indoctrination of 'dos' and 'donts'. It would be too late for any physical discipline. Teach her responsibility in her terms, just as she has a child at this age, which she may adore or resent, her actions in the past have consequences and responsibilities, and this is the nature of life. It is also important to convey that we are human, and that we are not defined by our responsibilities, but we cannot be happy without managing our lives. Encourage her wants and needs and explain to her how important taking God's name in vain is to you and in general.
2007-03-10 17:44:44 · answer #1 · answered by david s 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No. I think you did the right thing holding back. Nowadays kids will bring in the authorities on you. I completely understand you wanting to smack her though. Though my guess is it had more to do with how she is moreso than what she said. I mean, I can see why you allow her to stay in the house (because she has a son and you want her to be able to get schooling to get a good job to support herself and her son) but I personally think you should set some boundaries and rules for this girl. If she's going to live under your roof and you're paying all the bills, she has an obligation to help around the house and follow your rules. She needs to learn how to be responsible so she can take care of that baby. If she continues to be a pest, kick her out and fight for custody of the kid. If she can't even do dishes, straighten up, vacuum, or do some laundry - then she's not responsible enough to be a fit parent. You should not have to put up with this crap. That's how I was raised (that if we didn't help out we got kicked out of the house).
2007-03-10 17:10:15 · answer #2 · answered by swordarkeereon 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
what is up wit you people. smack that girl down and let that girl know who the real boss is. Betcha she will watch that mouth next time. I kinda think you let her get away with too much stuff long time ago and so she didn't think you should get mad this time. That is the thing about kids once they turn thirteen you know what ya got. Raging hormones and stuck in between adulthood and kidhood. Wanna be grown but still getting told what to do. Betcha your daughter will remember that slap until the day she dies and will always remember why she got it. I say go for it slap her so hard her 3 month old baby will feel it. (from my 13 year old son)
2007-03-10 18:14:34 · answer #3 · answered by bonitabertrell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where hitting wouldn't have done anything to help the problem...heck yes I would've smacked her! She was being a little immature, disrespectful brat! She has a baby & is still living in your home & YOU are taking care of the baby so she can stay in school & get an education, & this is the repayment you get? My parents ALWAYS had the rules, I don't care how old you are, as long as you live under our roof, you will abide by our rules & respect us, & this is the least your daughter can do for you, especially for all you do for her!
2007-03-10 17:18:01 · answer #4 · answered by tlcss06 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It is good you didn't smack her. Let God control your anger against your daughter so you won't smack her ever again. You can always pray to God for your daughter to help you around the house and you know it could happen she could start helping you out around the house. It seems your daughter isn't a Christian so she doesn't know she is saying God's name in vain but if you tell her it is God's name in vain then she will know.
2007-03-10 17:06:55 · answer #5 · answered by Josh D 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Although I am 17 myself, I would have to say I would have knocked the hell out of her mouth. If she can have a baby at 17 she can take a slap to the mouth. That is not the way God would have done it, but we are humans not gods.
You worded this question to make people think that you wanted to slap your daughter in the face. That is why you are getting some weird answers. But I know what you meant, you mean a pop only on the mouth. I think that is fine. She needs to learn some how. Did you punish her any other way?
2007-03-10 17:09:33 · answer #6 · answered by ibleedorange 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Ask yourself one thing would Jesus have smacked your Daughter in the mouth? I don't think so.
You are under a lot of stress. but please NEVER hit you daughter. I was abused as a child. and believe me it makes you want to hurt the person who hit you more. and I don't think hitting her would make her love God any more do you? I will Pray for you and your Daughter and your Grandson that God will make things a little better for all of you. Take Care
2007-03-11 22:37:13 · answer #7 · answered by Wendy Loves Jesus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that was very rude of her, if my mom took care of my baby when i was only 17 so i could stay in school i would be especially nice to her, your a great mother! Tell her that many mothers will throw away their child for giving birth at such a young age. To act like she is above working, is disturbing. I would tell her that you did a major favor for her, she has to understand that and respect that. She has to pull her weight too!
2007-03-12 10:23:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are enabling her to be a lazy, foul-mouthed little brat. Not only did you raise her, you are now raising her illegitimate child. That is your house, if she does not respect you,or appreciate all that you do for her, tell her to find somewhere else to live. She is 17, you can file papers to emancipate her then you would not be legally responsible for her . Option 2, wait until she turns 18, then tell her to hit the bricks! Lay down the law, if she doesn't help you, and disrespects you again......she's gone!
2007-03-10 17:26:56 · answer #9 · answered by Candace A 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I really dont think physically assualting your daughter is the answer to your problems. i also am very glad you used your strength of will not to hit her because 1) hitting leads to more hitting and more abuse and 2) she could have you charged with physical assault and 3) I am sure your God does not condone hitting people even if it is about protecting and defending the creators name. (Isn't God about patience, tolerance and love?)
It sounds like you and her maybe in crisis and could benifit from some counselling and support. it sounds like you are trying to help your daughter and you dont feel that your daughter respects all that you do. Please seek some help even if you ring a crisis line.
2007-03-10 17:08:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋