I found out my fiancee was texting a guy for about a month that she met at the bar. She is a bartender by the way. I still love her and I know she loves me. Idont know if I'll ever be able to trust her again. She says she never slept with the guy. She only text him. She said she is prepared to do whatever it takes to show me how much she wants to be with me. She sounds so convincing when she says "Our relationship is going to be so different now." I love her so much but is this gonna work or should I even try?
2007-03-10 14:00:52 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Why waste your time?
no
2007-03-10 14:05:40 · answer #1 · answered by ♥ ♥ C.J. ♥ ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you view her as your property because you are engaged? Do you honestly think she can't have friends of both sexes? She knew guys before you and she will know guys after you. Did you trust her before? Why wouldn't you trust her now? Has she showed you the text messages maybe it is just innocent chatter.
If you are going to get jealous every time she talks to a guy then you have a problem and the marriage won't work.
How is the communications between the two of you is it open and honest or does she know you better than you think and knew this would be your reaction to something innocent.
Talk to her and see how she really feels about this.
2007-03-10 22:09:47 · answer #2 · answered by quincyurt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's good to realize that it takes a person of a certain social level to even meet one person, so most people in relationships have trouble staying loyal, because obviously if they had enough social skills within them to meet one person, they have enough in them to meet several more.
Still, the most important thing is to determine whether or not she is telling the truth. If she just texted a guy, that's no offense in itself. If she would've been too shy to text a guy, she might've been too shy to have ever met you.
If she did do stuff, though, then the question becomes "forgive, or not forgive." So, the first thing is to determine whether she is telling the truth.
Personally, I would forgive her if you don't think you'll be meeting someone else for a while. Sad to make that the determining factor, but romance is so hit and miss that I would really give forgiveness a serious look.
2007-03-10 22:07:06 · answer #3 · answered by perfectlybaked 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love her and this is the first time something like this has happened or that you are aware of, give her the benefit of the doubt. If you think she might have gone furtherer than just texting.. have her get tested for STD's just to "make sure" which may not be a bad idea since she met him at a bar and who knows... but give her a second chance... if she does it again.. it's not worth it.
2007-03-10 22:06:00 · answer #4 · answered by Chiquita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave. I wasted two years trying to get over an e-mail. Once a person gets caught they become sneakier.
You trusted her. She betrayed your trust therefore how can you believe her now.
I'm to say, I think in my heart that you should end the relationship. No one will ever learn until you are gone. Maybe in a year you might want to try again.
You are a good guy and you should have a good girl. They are out there. How can you be open to opportunity unless you let the opportunity come to you?
Be honest with yourself. If she was text him while in a relationship with you... who's to say she won't be dating him after you leave.................................................................
Godspeed,
Jennifer
2007-03-10 22:21:28 · answer #5 · answered by JNM 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her another chance she sounds like she is really sorry for doing what she did..? And just because she textd him doesnt mean she slept with him! but i honestly think a second chance should go into place!! Good Luck and i hope that is all works out!!
2007-03-10 22:10:02 · answer #6 · answered by luh luh la reee! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
(Red Flag) I would hold off on the wedding she seems as if she is not 100% sure or confident that she truly wants to be with you and only you but just wants to keep you around. This situation seems suspicious, I would let time tell who she really is, words without actions are meaningless.
2007-03-10 22:06:04 · answer #7 · answered by Breann 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that everyone deserves a second chance only because we may not know what we were missing until it was gone. But if she messes up again then you leave and never look back.
2007-03-10 22:04:17 · answer #8 · answered by Viv 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
hunn, just remember everything that wnt wrong last time.. and then everything that went right.. compare them and make a decision! it's not anyone on yahoo's choice it's yours hunn! GOOD LUCK
2007-03-10 22:08:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why not trust her its only text mess. just tell her to give it up
2007-03-10 22:05:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋