paranoid schizophrenia??

Question

My ex partner has recently confessed that he had this illness, i had guessed but wasnt sure, however, can people with this illness hold down a loving relationship as i feel he is trying to tell me he wants me back?

Answer 1

This will be an unpopular answer, and I will acknowledge that there are exceptions to every rule, but my experience with schizophrenics by and large is that they generally will always experience difficulties with intimacy. They certainly can be loving partners and parents, and they can certainly fall in love and they can maintain stable intimate relationships, but it tends to depend largely on your expectations and needs for emotional intimacy whether the relationship will be satisfying for you.

Schizophrenics often tend to be more distant than what is generally desired in most intimate relationships and strong emotions tend to be difficult for them to handle, both their own as well as those of people around them.

The disease is life long and has a chronic course with no cure, although there are often long periods of stability or remission where folks remain free of the acute symptoms. The "negative" symptoms of amotivation, withdrawal, anhedonia and blunted affect are usually present to some degree, however, even during these stable periods. They can do relatively well in long term intimate relationships where there is a low demand for emotional intimacy, tolerance for social distance and minimal conflict, but highly charged emotional interactions would frequently precipitate decompensation and the onset of acute symptoms.

On the bright side, stable schizophrenics can be highly creative and philisophical individuals and they can be capable of great intellectual insight and stimulating conversation. They often tend to be exceptionally open-minded and accepting of people's limitations and quirks and rarely have I known a schizophrenic to be judgemental toards others which is a trmendous strength. They tend to be quite sensitive and gentle people, given to emotional extremes only when acutely symptomatic and when stable they are refreshingly undemanding. They are often unique and wonderfully eccentric and bring a great deal of individuality to any relationship. It is the emotional arena where where relationships can be most challenged.

Answer 2

of course people can have a loving relationship- he has an illness in the same way some one can become ill with a disorder or virus or even cancer. Its throws a spanner into the works sure, but doesnt change their relationship statue unless the people around them are too small minded to see just a label and not see the person standing riht behind it.

You must talk to him about this and if possible, his mental health worker or psychiatrist-with him- to iron out any niggling doubts and qustions and to know what will help him/ support him and how to improve his illness.

People with mental health problems are two-a-penny, they are everywhere. They eat the same food as you, use the same transport system you do, shop in the same shops. They are really just like everyone else but carry a more awkwardly shaped bag of past with them.

Illnesses are not always for ever and ever, in the same way a person may live cancer free for many years, so may a person with mental health problems, its just about finding a more comfortable balance of health.

Talk things through with him. Its important he doesnt rely on you to make him feel better/take away the illness, or he could become clingy which is ultimatly damaging for the relationship and his mental health in the long term.

Answer 3

They can certainly hold down loving relationships, but only if they're willing to acknowledge their illness and work with you to overcome it. He needs to seek continued counceling from a mental health professional who will most likely prescribe meds to help combat the negatie affects of the disorder. But it's also important that you both have a clear understanding of the disease and know how to handle it. Therapy for him is a must, but it's probably not a bad idea for the two of you to go together occasionally if you're really serious about this relationship.

Best of luck!

Answer 4

One of my friends with this illness worked for the BBC - people with schizophrenia can recover and certainly lead normal lives. It can difficult to be with someone with a psychotic illness but by no means impossible - 1% of people in this country have schizophrenia and plenty are in a relationship

Answer 5

I have worked with skizophrenics. There are different severities of the illness. Some people can function day to day with medications while others end up in long term facilities. Every person is different. Skizophrenics can live a good life but they need medication. They are hard to be around because the delusions come and go and they are usually very suspicious people. A person is born with skizophrenia and it never goes away.

Skizophrenics can have loving relationships but it's hard for them to not be paranoid or to put others before themselves. They spend so much time battling with inner demons it takes a toll on them.

Answer 6

Speaking from a personal level as someone with schizophrenia , I find it very hard to form a loving relationship with anyone at all. If you run away -I want you back, if you run towards me - I'll can be very nasty and push you away. I've given up on that side of my life but have some very good friends whom I don't feel the need to push away.
You need to put yourself first.

Brilliant answer from opester, very insightful and very true.

Answer 7

Carolina. It is so nice of him that he confessed that he suffers from this illness. He will need a lot of support. People with mental illnesses need to be treated as normal people. This will give him confidence. You must be understanding if you really love him. [e-mail]

Answer 8

Living human kind with old age were having twin personality.
Confuse the young ones when they were communicating at higher level of their minds in planet of apes.
Can create misunderstanding with the young ones.
To solve the problem is to ignore them but listen closely to what they communicating.
They know what they are talking about just that the young ones do not pay attention since sometime get shot at with point blanks in planet of apes.
Sometime they are mistaken for a looney in planet of apes.

Answer 9

An ex girlfriend was clinically diagnosed with this.It's kind of like who's chasing and who's running....the closer you try to get, the farther away they move. If you move away, they try to get closer...To have a loving relationship with a paranoid schizophreniac, you have to remain aloft, and let them move closer...Some are suicidal....after the third attempt, I closed the door....after 14 years, she still calls me at work; can't get her to stop, no matter what I say.

Answer 10

My guess is he telling you because it only way to explain his behavior. People with mental illness are scared to tell because of the image the media / movies as well as people fear of those with illness.