What's the best way to get out of depression?

Question

I took a million tests and they al said i was depressed. I dont want to tell my mom becauses she has enough stress with the divorce. Life has been really bad and now i have a chance to fufill my dream of being in a band but i cant belt out a song like i use to! I love singing and i know how to do it because ithey all herd me belt out "Lithium" by Evanescence. I can sing. but if i dont turn off the shyness im going to be kicked out of the band. I'm starting to heal but today its all comming back. I need help. How can i be ok again? SHould i tell the band everything thats happened to me so they can understand? I'm really confused and right now im thinking about it too much and crying my brains out. Please someone tell em how to get rid of this. (im not suicideal. I love to be alive thank you very much)

Answer 1

therapy

Answer 2

First of all, power to you for singing! I love "Lithium" and wish I could sing like that. I end up coming off as a choir girl though.

To your question: Exercise is often a great way to combat feeling blue. Even something as simple as skipping rope 200 times will get your brain going. Another fun thing is Pilates. Sometimes I actually do the exercises, but most of the time I just play on the big bouncy ball. It's worth it, because it's fun and silly. Sunshine also makes me feel better, but I live in Michigan where it is winter most of the year so I don't always get that one. Also make sure you're not undersleeping or oversleeping - both can make sad feelings worse.

If your band is having trouble understanding what you're going through, sitting them down and talking about it might help you both. If they just don't seem to get it, just remember that your first priority is taking care of your own feelings.

As a fellow musician (pianist really) I have often turned to creative processes to help me work out my feelings. Sometimes indulging in your artistic side can help to unwind your brain and also serve as a healthy form of expression. Just don't hurt your voice!

Finally, internet quizzes are not always a reliable source of diagnosis. While they might suggest to you that you have some issues, just because some quiz says you're depressed doesn't mean you are. You are ultimately in control of that, no matter how out-of-control your feelings might get. Consider talking to a counselor or trusted friend/mentor. Divorces are hard for everyone. My parents made me go see a counselor, and at first I was completely against the idea. But after I went a few times, I realized that it made me feel much better just to have someone outside the family drama to talk to. Many places offer free or low cost counseling availiable to people of all ages, so check with your school/city or check the internet for places in your area.

Good luck.

Answer 3

First things first......relax...take it easy. Don't sweat the small stuff, cause the big stuff is what kills ya Everyone has I dunno what to even call it, i guess maybe a "life force" that makes you wake up every morning and say, "here we go". another day. I cry when I see a three legged dog. but you know what? They never feel sorry for themselves, they don't dwell on why they're different, they don't sit and worry about how they will get through the day. They wake up and think to themselves...."well I guess I only have three legs now....here we go" What I'm trying to say is....you are alive....you are healthly.....you are probably beautiful. Love life Live life. Thank God for each day. Life is such a wonderful gift. Drink in every day like a cool glass of water. Let it flow through your veins....Let the air blow through your hair, plant a tomato seed and eat a tomato from that plant. The next day it's raining walk outside and dance in the rain. . Go treat yourself to a very expensive meal at a great resaurant for no reason. Go to the beach for a day, go to a park and play with some kids, watch some squirrels , get a dog who loves you. Above all...just love being alive...live it. It's so wonderful.

Answer 4

you have to practice the cup is half full and not half empty. The big mistake people make is they think there the only one with the problem thats what depression will tell you yet millions of people work hard not to be depressed and thats what you must do you can lick this problem for ever and ever but its gonna take practice until the tools pop up . start by if its raining dont say **** its raining say this is when i think at my best until you believe in your self . where theres bad theres always good if worse comes to worse you can always say wheather its good or bad only god does and changes things not me or you its not our fault. practice seeing things on a positive note end you will belive what ever you want and strenght will come from practice remember you have the rest of your life if you practice on a postive note until you belive more of the cup being half filled then empty life will run smooth it take work your motivation should be your here for 20or30 more years work now live latter just like your in a hole pull your self out of it and eventually you mind will stop depression in its tracks before it takes over the day score how many times do you start you day over more then 15 times not good 5 or less is very good . and then you are in a day where road blocks are coming at you for whatevre reasons. sometimes cause i believe? i will say after this walk or tea or coffee or whatever i will feel 1 hundred percent better guess what it works evertime . practice till you believe and you will be a natural with the secrets of life . mrs magic .

Answer 5

I don't know your age; however, I resisted medication for years--can be used temporarily & NOT NEC. THE "POPULAR" ONES, which have sideeffects.
If you have a GOOD doctor, not a family doctor--they will dish out anything; you might want to consider going on one for a temporary period of time--altho' divorce can take years. Sounds like you have some trauma as well; this can only get more ingrained w/out a therapist trained in Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Trust me; I tried for years telling people I had that and well, they & research for WOMEN took so long that I have it full blown clinically.
But, yours sounds like this: support professionally would help; perhaps medications & remember, it doesn't have to be longterm & it doesn't have to be heavy duty; mine is low key and can be taken moderately w/wine; never mix regular alcohol like whiskey w/it; never. "Scrambles" your brain, & you will feel like ****.
I say all this, bec. now my stress is very high, trigger traumas including a divorce that happened when I was 4. I am now 55.
The sooner it's addressed, the sooner you can get on w/your life. Please, don't try to handle it on your own.
Telling you Mom can only help the both of you grieve properly IF YOUR MOM CAN HANDLE IT. I would weigh that VERY carefully; try journalling until the "right" time seems to happen & if you get a good therapist, he/she can talk w/you about that as well.
Then, DO TELL YOU BAND. They are your community, your group, etc. If they can't handle it; you are in the wrong band--seriously.
Don't let them suggest a lot of wine, beer, other alchohol or pot. It will only make your situation worse; trust me!! I drank 3 beers, sometimes more every night for years & wallowed in my depression; a little lifts your spirits; more--will cause your brain to get depressed.
Cigs. aren't good either as they deplete the vitamins which help your body deal w/stess. A good B-complex w/C could help as well.
My medicine stops my crying and allows me to get on w/life; I also take something for anxiety--never had shyness as an adult; but, it helps w/my anxiety or if I were you, I'd have STAGEFRIGHT !!

You sound like a wonderful person going thru a hard time; take care of yourself; I'm sure many want to hear your music.

P.S. If you have a severe brain chemistry imbalance, not just depression; please! listen to your doctors--if you trust them to be knowlegiable (sp) and get help.

Answer 6

I am so glad that you are not suicidal and know that this will pass. I think that idea of you talking to the band will help but I also think talking to your mom may help too. Sounds like there is alot of upheaval going on in your life and that right there is reason to be sad. Makes me think you have a reason to be down as depression is usually being sad without a reason in lots of cases.
Get some therapy too if you need help. Remember this too as it is important. Just because your mom and dad are not married anymore none of this is your fault. I am sure both of your parents love you very much. Talk to them about your feelings. I am sure that they will be more understanding then you realize and they will want to know what is going on inside you.

Answer 7

The best thing to do is talk to someone, preferably someone with lots of experience. A school counselor would be perfect, after all that's a big part of their job.

Also you might consider getting lots of exercise and eating healthy foods. A big help could be to do volunteer work. This allows you to connect with other people in a meaningful way and may help broaden your perspective on some very difficult situations.

Answer 8

Well since you are afraid to talk to your mother. I'd say the best way is if you find some friends who care about you since being with supporting family/friends will keep you motivated and positive. Tell your bandmates, and they will probably help you since they care and want you as a singer. There are a lot of help sites out there such as:
http://www.depressionisreal.org/

Or just go to your doctor and give him/her your symptoms and they would be able to help you and supply you with the correct medications.

Answer 9

sing something that has some emotion to it and energy.

music is gr8 outlet.

shyness? focus on the music not the ppl watching. Use music to express yopur inner feelings.

tell the band? depends on their personality. mabye get the sing some songs reflect your feeling?

glad you love being alive. me too, had my downs too b4.

Answer 10

Part of your depression is that you want to keep it a secret. tell your mom. Get medication if your doctor recommends it. You can try an hour of vigorous exercise a day, but that only helps mild cases.

Answer 11

try to be possitive. i think you should tell the band if they are good frineds they should understand everything that you are going through. you should also tell your mom keeping it a secret will not help you you need to tell someone. it will help trust me.get better soon.