What is up with Ezekiel 23?

Question

I think it is a parable where Samaria and Israel bear the name Oholah and Jerusalem and Judah bear the name of Oholibah.

But then at 23:20 whoever wrote it goes on a tangent about donkey schlongs and horse semen.

The KJV tries to be nice about it with
"For she doted upon their paramours, whose flesh is as the flesh of asses, and whose issue is like the issue of horses."

But a lot of other bibles are less euphemistic about the whole thing: http://bible.cc/ezekiel/23-20.htm
The God's Word translation really gets into the spirit of things.

props to Sho for alerting me to this fantastic bit of god-inspired weirdness.

awww it looks like this one is not going to make it to the front page. Damned glitchy Yahoo.

Answer 1

It's biblical pornography! There's a lot more sick things were that came from though.

Here ya go:

How many good Christians today realize that their God has coprophilic tendencies?

"And thou shalt eat it as barley cakes, and thou shalt bake it with dung that cometh out of man, in their sight. And the LORD said, Even thus shall the children of Israel eat their defiled bread among the Gentiles, whither I will drive them." (Ezekiel 4:12-13)

Whatever moral lesson an adult might gain from such questionable verses, one can only wonder. How many parents realize that their children, who might come across such filthy passages, could get the wrong message?Any mention of eating feces and drinking urine in any secular writing would get considered obscene and sick by any righteous minded Christian. Then why should it not receive the same consideration if found in a bible? Might we ask what artistic or social value this verse presents?

"But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to thy master, and to thee, to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?" (II Kings 18:27)

Answer 2

You might find this commentary interesting (or maybe not, since this doesn't seem to be a serious question anyway):

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Ezekiel 23:1-49. ISRAEL'S AND JUDAH'S SIN AND PUNISHMENT ARE PARABOLICALLY PORTRAYED UNDER THE NAMES AHOLAH AND AHOLIBAH.

The imagery is similar to that in the sixteenth chapter; but here the reference is not as there so much to the breach of the spiritual marriage covenant with God by the people's idolatries, as by their worldly spirit, and their trusting to alliances with the heathen for safety, rather than to God.

2. two . . . of one mother--Israel and Judah, one nation by birth from the same ancestress, Sarah....



20. their paramours--that is, her paramours among them (the Egyptians); she doted upon their persons as her paramours (Ezekiel 23:5,12,16).

flesh--the membrum virile (very large in the ***). Compare Leviticus 15:2, Margin; Ezekiel 16:26.

issue of horses--the seminal issue. The horse was made by the Egyptians the hieroglyphic for a lustful person.

Answer 3

It was the most useful form of insult, as these things were considered most vile.

Also, when wood was not available, dried dung was used like wood, to cook with. I'm sure you've heard of cow patties, right? They use to use cow patties in the old west to cook with when there was no wood. I'm guessing a few used their own dung, but doubtful it would have been written about. I'm guessing it didn't smell too good, but I suppose you gotta do what you gotta do to survive.

Answer 4

Never try to understand the Bible word for word - sometimes the translations will confuse the spit out of you!

Answer 5

Yeah. I've read that one before. It actually got me turned on.

Answer 6

for being an athiest you sure are obsessed by the bible.....as most of your questions are related to this subject......do you spend many a night on your own...you poor soul.....try your local church for guidance.....you may find salvation....

Answer 7

lmao. gotta love that