Blonde jokes!!!?

Question

Do you know any funny (But clean!!) Blonde jokes? The person who submits the most jokes will get best answer.

Let the best answer win!

I don't want any websites. I just want a long list of jokes.

Err, what is your stinking problem?? WHy are you attacking me? What have I done to you to receive such hateful remarks??

Err, what is your stinking problem?? WHy are you attacking me? What have I done to you to receive such hateful remarks??

Answer 1

This is THE best blonde joke... lmao!!

2 blonde women go on a boat and they go a couple miles away from the water when their boat suddenly breaks down. one of them decides to swim back to shore to get help. when she gets halfway, she says she is too tired so she goes back to th boat... hahaha

did u get it? she was already halfway to shore when she got tired. she should've just swam to shore instead of back to the boat because it would've been the same distance... lmao!!


here's another one:
Q: how do you know if a blonde tried to commit suicide?

A: there were six bullet holes in the mirror.

another one:
A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were on their way to Heaven. God told them that the stairway to Heaven was 1000 steps, and that on every 5th step He would tell them a joke. He told them not to laugh at any of the jokes along the way or else they would not be able to enter Heaven. The brunette went first and started laughing on the 45th step, so she could not enter Heaven. The redhead went next and started laughing on the 200th step, so she could not enter Heaven either. Then, it was the blonde's turn. When she got to the 999th step, she started laughing. "Why are you laughing?" God asked. "I didn't tell a joke." "I know," the blonde replied. "I just got the first joke."

Here's some more. the last one is the funniest, LOL!!

1 . Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? You have to hollow out the head. 2. Why won't they hire Blondes as pharmacists? They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters
3. Hear about the blonde that got an AM RADIO? It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.
4. What happened to the blonde Ice Hockey Team? They drowned in Spring Training.
5. Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side.
6. How did the blonde die drinking milk? The cow stepped on her.
7. How did the blonde burn her nose? Bobbing for French fries.
8. Why do blondes have more fun? They are easier to amuse.
9. What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? Frosted flakes. 10. Why can't blondes put in light bulbs? They keep breaking them with the hammer.
11. Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow in the air? She missed.
12. What is it when a blonde blows into another blondes ear? Data transfer.
13. Why did the blonde resolve to have only three children? Because she read that one child out of every four born was Chinese.
14. Why did the blonde put make-up on her forehead? She wanted everyone to know that she was able to make up her mind.
15. Why did the blonde ask her friends to save their burned-out light bulbs? She needed them for the darkroom she was building.
16. Why are the Japanese so smart? No blondes.
17. What is the biggest advantage to marrying a blonde? You get to park in the Handicapped Zone.

Answer 2

Have u heard of the blonde who tripped over a cordless phone? And got locked in a grocery store and starved to death?

Q: What did the Blonde do when she went to a film that had an NC-17 (no under 17's) rating? A: Went home and got 16 friends.

Q: How can you tell a FAX has been sent from a blonde?
A: There's a stamp on it.


Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird?
A: Threw it off a cliff.

Q: What's the guaranteed method to totally confuse a Blonde Man?
A: Ask him to alphabetise a King-size bag of M&Ms.

Q: Why can't blondes put in light bulbs?
A: Keep breakin em' with hammers.

Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
A: From crawling across the street when the pedestrian sign said "DON'T WALK".

Answer 3

Okay there was a Blonde and a Red Head at a bar and they were watching the news and this guy was about to jump off of a building so the Red Head says, " I bet you ten dollars that the man jumps off of the building." So, then the Blonde says," I bet you ten dollars that he does't." So, they watch it and the man does jump off of the building. So, the Red Head says," I saw the five o'clock news so I knew that he would." Then the Blonde says," Oh. I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think that he would jump off the building again!"

What do Blondes call Cheerios?

Answer: Dounut Seeds!

Answer 4

I Want to Buy That

A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV --it's a microwave!"

Answer 5

a lava lamp is like a blonde fun to look at but not so bright!

Answer 6

http://www.humorsphere.com/sms/clean_blonde_jokes.htm

http://www.all4humor.com/jokes/blonde-jokes/clean-blonde-jokes.html

http://www.ahajokes.com/blonde_jokes.html

all clean and funny check 'em out.

Answer 7

blonde wants a pizza and servicer asks: could I divide the pizza into six slices or eight?
the blonde answers: six slices are enough,eight slices are too much

Answer 8

try this. they have a lot