He was very nice and I could tell that he didn't know he was coming across rude in one area. I didn't say anything but after our date I did tell him because he honestly didn't know and I like him. I would rather be honest then blow him off. Did I do right? He seemed to take it ok and I was right, he didn't know. My first boyfriend 10 years ago called me high maintanence whenever I would express myself or even just have a feeling or a need... so I am self concious about this. Should I have said something.. or just blow him off and not go out with him again? Was that high maintenance?
2007-03-10 05:12:16 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No it wasn't high maintenance. It's being assertive. It was being polite. It's no different than telling him when he has spinach between his teeth. If he didn't take it that way, it's his loss. As far as the one ten years ago, that called you high maintenance and made you self conscious about expressing your thoughts and opinions, I would bet that either he's alone now, or he's grown up since then.
2007-03-10 05:22:17 · answer #1 · answered by Lesley M 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
High maintenance is actually a good thing. You did the right thing. If you and he are going to be together for a significant amount of time he should know what bothers you. If he shows a willingness to change that area of his behavior, he probably values you highly.
2007-03-10 05:22:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would've been better had U remarked about it sooner(not after the date) but while it is still fresh in his mind.>>more with a "doesn't it make you look like an A-hole when you say it in that way? You can be above that, can you not?" I like guys more who can say it with elequence and tact.
He would be more likely to think about it, analyze and make a decision on the next time....maybe even do some studying on using words.
YOU yourself must realize that guys are wired differently than your gender. We fight and then we talk.
We are not feely. We kill. Hence the role of the mother(raising and caring) and father(protect and kill food).
Understand that and don't ask any male to be like you and life will be grand.
2007-03-10 05:27:59 · answer #3 · answered by ButwhatdoIno? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that honesty is the most important part of any relationship. It is never proper to be rude to a woman at any point on a date, it seems to me that if a person doe's not know their own mind, they should not be dating. Everybody has a right to express themselves openly as long as they are not hurtful to anyone and considerate of others feelings.
2007-03-10 05:20:56 · answer #4 · answered by Robert D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you did the right thing, granted we dont know what he did but if you are feeling something, you should express it, nobodys feelings are wrong, that is how someone feels, he doesnt have to aggree with the way you felt but definitely get things out in the open now, because if you keep pushing your feelings in you will never have a solid relationship.
2007-03-10 05:17:19 · answer #5 · answered by shelly63795 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot depends on what he did and if it is just a personal thing with you.
If you would like to see him again, then I think you were right to tell him if whatever he did bothers you so much.
High maintenance is defined by a boyfriend who doesn't want to take the time to treat his girl right.
2007-03-10 05:16:53 · answer #6 · answered by Blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well one date is hard to determine but as long as you bring it to his attention in an appropriate way then you should be fine. I would not call expressing your feelings to be "high maintenance". !0 years ago is a long time happy......you might want to move on with that ex boyfriends opinion. good luck.
2007-03-10 05:18:17 · answer #7 · answered by chazzz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its kind of hard to say if you should have said something or not since I don't know what it is he did. However, honesty has always worked in my book, even if you are "high maintenance" there is someone out there for you too.
2007-03-10 05:16:48 · answer #8 · answered by michy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although it would be nice to know what he did or said, i think you did the right thing. Im pretty open with my feelings and thoughts, and if you feel the need to express yourself, you should. If he doesnt like it, then obviously he's not the right guy for you!
2007-03-10 05:16:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
"high maintenance" is what losers call girls who have self-esteem. -Suffice it to say, any one who calls you high maintenance is not worth your time. However, this new guy seems to have taken constructive criticism with class, which, means he's at least somewhat quality. I say, see how this new relationship goes, and leave your Ex in the past.
2007-03-10 05:16:46 · answer #10 · answered by Sylvie M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋