i want to send a funny text to a friend so they will laugh they pants of please they havent laughed since ages!!!!
2007-03-10 04:43:06 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
1 day you'll b surprised 2 c me beside u. u and me laughing, u and me crying, u and me dreaming, u and me holding on 2gether...just u and me sitting in a fcuking mental hospital. But i'll still love you mate.......even tho i wont know who the fcuk u are!
2007-03-10 05:11:39 · answer #1 · answered by mishnbong 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
How two cats greet each other at Christmas?
"A furry merry Christmas & Happy mew year!
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because chickens hadn't evolved yet
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet. "My dog's cross eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy"...
Q: What does a baby computer call his father
A: Data!
Q: Why was the computer cold?
A: It left it's Windows open!
2007-03-10 04:51:01 · answer #2 · answered by Luv Rulz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my fav. joke:
Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying, "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an accident."
"OH DEAR GOD NO," Bush exclaims. "That's terrible!!"
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the president sits, head in hands. Finally, the President, devastated, looks up and asks, "How many is a Brazillion??!"
hmm... kinda long for a text message, but i'll try and find a shorter one.
Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in O'Leary's apartment when Paddy Murphy loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen brother, the other five continue playing standing up.
Michael O'Conner looks around and asks, "Oh, me boys, someone got's to tell Paddy's wife. Who will it be?"
They draw straws. Liam Gallagher picks the short one. They tell him to be discreet be gentle, don't make a bad situation any worse.
"Discreet??? I'm the most discreet Irishmen you'll ever meet. Discretion is my middle name. Leave it to me"
Gallagher goes over to Murphy's house and knocks on the door Mrs. Murphy answers and asks what he wants. Gallagher declares: "Your husband just lost $500 and is afraid to come home"
"Tell him to drop dead!" says Murphy's wife.
"I'll go tell him." says Gallagher.
Dang but that's even longer :(
2007-03-10 04:48:17 · answer #3 · answered by Your mom goes to college 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've just won a holiday to Fiji for me and five friends. All inclusive including 1000 spending money each! So I was just wondering since we are such good friends and we go a long way back...if you'd like to put my bin out next Monday.
2007-03-10 05:02:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Goodness I have a few!!!
this one I got from here earlier and loved it!!!
it has been reported that a paedophile has been shot dead in Tesco's - Every Little Helps!
Good NEWS. Call charges on your network are changing. The uglier you are the cheaper the calls.
As from today ALL your calls are FREE!!
I've got a few rude one that I won't put on here but if you want them then email me!!!!
2007-03-10 04:50:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wishing you a seductive and horny morning,
Licked by love and penetrated with heavenly graces.
May all your problems be ejaculated before the climax of the day. Have a sexy day!
now considering on your sense of humour, you could either think this is just plain perverted or completely hilarious.. haha you decide
2007-03-10 05:02:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Be like wuddit do wuddit dooooo or like jointly as your texting everyonce in a jointly as textual content textile random issues like if she/he's like oh we broke blah blah blah textual content textile meatloaf and then attempt and comphert them?
2016-10-01 21:36:21 · answer #7 · answered by liptak 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
News flash...Aliens have invaded earth and are abducting all sexy people. Dont worry, your safe, I'm just texting to say goodbye...
2007-03-13 04:51:09 · answer #8 · answered by johnapdavies 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I vote fannela the first person
2007-03-10 04:53:22 · answer #9 · answered by Ghost Drift 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Butt Cheeks are just like friendship
It doesn't matter how much crap comes between them, they still always stick together
2007-03-10 04:54:46 · answer #10 · answered by HockeyFan 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋