A man walked into a bar. He said ow!, it was an iron bar.
My wife's a sex object. Every time I want sex she objects
She said "it's new year, will you kiss my mother under the mistletoe?". I said "I wouldn't kiss her under anaesthetic".
My wife and me had 18 happy years........then we met.
I said" I'm going for a pint, get your coat on ." She said "Are you taking me for a drink?". I said "No I'm turning the heating off "
She's got a head for money. There's a slot just behind her ear.
Two men walk in to a pub. One says "I'll have a pint of bitter and donkey will have a lager" then he dashes to the toilet. While he's gone the barman says"Why does he call you donkey?". the bloke says " I d d d ont k k know, hehaw hehaw hehaways s s says that".
My wife's so fat last time we went to Brighton she got asked to leave the beach because the tide was waiting to come in.
2007-03-10 04:38:44 · 14 answers · asked by fatles 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
I asked if you like them old and corny, and that's what I posted. This is not a competition. But I agree about the Brazilian joke, it's a very good one. It was even funnier when it was new in the 60s by Spike Milligan in The Goon Show.
2007-03-10 05:14:03 · update #1
thought you were getting personal, then I realised you meant the jokes. compared to some of the recent postings these get a 9 / 10.
2007-03-10 05:56:16 · answer #1 · answered by billtheangler 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
um... mine kicks all of yours's a$$es:
Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying, "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an accident."
"OH DEAR GOD NO," Bush exclaims. "That's terrible!!"
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the president sits, head in hands. Finally, the President, devastated, looks up and asks, "How many is a Brazillion??!"
0/10 on yours btw... sorry.
2007-03-10 12:46:14 · answer #2 · answered by Your mom goes to college 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore the idiot who gave you 0/10. Just jealousy.
You deserve at least 8.5 out of 10.
Thanks for the laughs.
2007-03-10 15:00:24 · answer #3 · answered by dteacher1uk 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a couple of good ones there!!
And you did say they were old and corny but worth a revisit!
2007-03-10 13:25:46 · answer #4 · answered by pammy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ha Ha! Funny! Good ones!
2007-03-10 18:06:25 · answer #5 · answered by cats 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I liked some of them.
2007-03-10 13:55:30 · answer #6 · answered by Jus_014 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Old and corny, alright! So when do we get the fresh and funny?????
Tnx.
2007-03-10 12:48:45 · answer #7 · answered by Inday 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
L O L
2007-03-10 12:56:48 · answer #8 · answered by Luv Rulz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very good! Liked it!
2007-03-10 12:44:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You were right about the old and corny bit! THEY ALL SUCKED!
2007-03-10 12:46:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋