eBay transaction: Should I go with my heart and give negative feedback?

Question

I'm extremely frustrated. I feel she deserves a Negative feedback but I know she'll retaliate and do the same to me. She certainly doesn't deserve a *Positive*, and if I gave her a Neutral I would feel I was being dishonest – to both myself and potential buyers. Here's what happened:

1. Feb. 13 - I email her to tell her I've seen others comment on her slow shipping, and that she ships only "weekly." I ask her which day that is, and how long shipping takes from that day.
2. Feb 13 - she responds to my email within that very hour:

“If you order a _____ I can ship this out to you today :o) if you are ordering more full size products they will be going out in next week's shipment as I only ship out once a week and am behind two weeks right now :( I was out of town all last week due to a family emergency and I am just back yesterday. I will be getting to emails and also shipping out items this week. So if your item doesn't make this week's shipment it will go out in next week's…

If you decide to order I will be sure to include some green tea, cute Valentine's gift wrap + cherry cordial hershey's kisses little candy gifts in your package for you.”

3. My heart goes out to her. I immediately email her back and express condolences for her family emergency. I tell her it’s a sweet thought, but there’s no need to send extras – that as long as she ships the package that day, I’ll be more than happy. I buy the item.

4. Within a short while I get an email from Paypal saying my item will be shipped w/the USPS, etc.

5. Feb. 20 – No item. I email her to find out the status. No reply.

6. Feb. 23 – No item. I email her again. I inform her that I’m moving & soon will no longer be at this address to receive the package.

7. Feb. 24 – Her reply is as follows:

“I am so so sorry to hear that you haven't received this yet! As I did ship this out a while ago….indeed I checked on it and it shows that it hasn't been received by you yet. I will ship out a replacement today.”

8. I receive the item. Prettily packaged & there are candies as well. The item is brand new, as described. Though I’m not really impressed by it and won’t be buying another from her.

I honestly feel that this girl flat out lied to me about her intent to ship on Feb. 13. I have read her feedback and it’s inconsistent. I think she does this once in a while and then plays the victim (she constantly uses these “=(“ sad faces in her writing) and “placates” her customers with pretty packages and candy. It’s such BS. Have you ever dealt with a seller like this? How should I rate her?

Thanks for all your answers so far!
Art Mom - perhaps you didn't see #8 above? I did receive the item within 2 days of her saying she'd ship it out for the 2nd time. Item was just as described, I simply don't like it (which is not her fault).

Also, she's one of the sellers who likes to hold back and WAIT for the customer to give feedback first (of course she does -- she knows it might be negative. lol). I guess another question is - Should I email her before I give the negative and tell her? (Some sellers complain that the buyer gave bad feedback "without warning")...

1 last thing - If i give a reason for the feedback, she'll write the excuse she gave me: "Had a Family Emergency" which I've seen in her feedback before...

THANKS EVERYONE SO FAR!!! =)

I'M WRITING THIS IN CAPS - PLEASE READ:

*I BOUGHT THE ITEM *ONLY* B/C ***SHE PROMISED TO SHIP IT THAT SAME DAY.*** NOT THE NEXT WEEK. NOT IN 2 WEEKS. THAT SAME DAY!!
*THE FIRST USPS TRACKING # STILL STATES "THERE IS NO RECORD OF THIS ITEM."

Answer 1

Yap, you can do that. Just a tip, mark your calendar and set your alarm. wait for the 89th day. Then leave the negative. If she doesn't check her ebay, she won't be able to leave you a negative the next day. You can only leave negative within 90 days after you made the transaction. :-)

Answer 2

It could very easily be that the package was lost or misdirected in the mail. I just sent a replacement for a manual that I shipped to a buyer in Montana 5 weeks ago. He purchased it on the 29th of January and paid with Paypal. I shipped it the next day. Lo & behold... He received the original manual the day after I shipped the replacement. This goes to show you that the seller has no control over the actions of the USPS. They will tell you that something will be delivered in X amount of days but will never guarantee it unless you ship express mail. I once sent an item by Priority Mail that took 16 days to reach the customer who was only 800 miles away.
I'd also like to know why eveyone expects their items at their door within days of their purchase. Try that with any catalog sales company and see how long it takes!
Once a week shipping isn't all that uncommon. I ship at least 3 times a week but that's just me. I want the stuff gone!
Two weeks to receive an item is not an ungodly amount of time and is a basic eBay guideline.
Have a little patience & understanding. Sellers are people just like you and they have all the same issues in life as other people.
I don't go handing out Negatives to every person that sends payment weeks late.

Answer 3

I have been retaliated against for a sweatshirt in misses I ordered in womens size and wrote a neg. Now I eiter do a neutral and a specific comment or nothing. I am EXTREMELY careful not to order from anyone with less than a 99% anymore. Just don't want to go through it- You don't say if you got the item finally or are happy with it- I mailed a email to one person outlining my complaint but didn't put it on feedback. People who are bad sellers are small people-they don't respect the system By the way-I'm 100%-I think its important-good luck

Answer 4

Why do you assume that she lied? She could be telling the truth, and at least you got your item in good condition. I sent money to a merchant on eBay for an item & never received it. When I complained, they claimed it was my fault that they sent it to the wrong address (because I paid by bill pay & the envelope with the check had the address of the bank) even though I gave them my correct address when I ordered it. Now, they told me sorry, we will re-ship. A week later I got a C.O.D item, which of course I refused because the item was already pre-paid. after that, they didn't return my emails or messages I left on voice mail. When I put a claim on eBay, they told me sorry........there was nothing they could do because the item price was under $25.00. (It was $22.95 plus another $10.00 for shipping & handling). Now who do you think was worse, the cheating merchant who ripped me off or eBay for condoning it?

Answer 5

First thing, if you feel she deserves a negative feed back, do it. you should let everyone know about her shipping. And as far as her leaving negative feedback for you, as long as you have positive from other sellers one negative shouldnt hurt you. She is trying to "butter" everyone by sending extras so no one will leave negative feedback. i would also check with the postal service and see if it was shipped the first time. my mom sells things on ebay and i know she offers tracking numbers for people.

Answer 6

No. She does not deserve it. You got your item as described in the allowable time. She did not rip you off nor did she send something other then what was described.

I would not leave any feedback at all. FYI, the transaction is not complete until the customer is happy with the item they received so why on earth would she leave you feedback just for paying?

Answer 7

I think you should give her a negative feedback.
I'm Not familiar with Ebay, can you explain your reasons?

I think it would be good if you could make a little note that "Item was not sent in time advertised by seller." or something to that effect.

I've only purchased once or twice from Ebay and only had to give One negative feedback. It was a similar reason. They sent me the UPS tracker number... but when I called UPS they said that it was the wrong number. She gave me the wrong number, claimed up and down it was mine and sent out MY item 2 weeks later.

I think you are justified in speaking your mind, that's why it's there. If she had a family Emergency she should have taken care of her Sales before she left town ... because i sounds like she's running a business of it.

Answer 8

Give her a negative feedback. She's a terrible seller. Even if she had a family emergency, she still has an obligation to you as the buyer.

You don't make a business by shipping once a week. That doesn't make sense. She's not going to stay in business if she keeps upsetting her buyers!

Answer 9

you have not performed something incorrect- the comments button on e-bay and on many E-commerce portals are there to grant impartial perspectives on the overall performance of the seller. In a fashion they're like an "coverage plans" - in case you provide a good service then you definately get very good comments - in case you mess it up and don't make amends then you definately shoget comments that mirror this which could be seen via the subsequent ability client. If i became you i may be the single going to E-bay and reporting the seller and enclose the messages you have gained - they could be those on report not you!

Answer 10

Go with your gut. HER feedback is inconsistent for a reason. Even if she gives you a bad feedback in retaliation. YOUR feedback will have a track record of consistency. I'm sure eBay shoppers will understand one bad feedback if the rest are good on yours. Your bad feedback could have been from a situation like hers, even though we know hers was fictional, you could be too to explain why you got bad feedback.