My gf and I have split up but she wants to be remain friends. We still meet up and text each other most days but I'm dreading the day when she says she's met someone else as I guess I still have feelings for her. Every time I mention moving on she gets upset and says that she still wants me as part of her life.
I can't see how this would work or am I just being selfish?
2007-03-10 04:17:01 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No, she's being selfish. She wants to have you around still to care about her and satisfy her need to feel like someone cares about her. Your desires are natural and should be taken to action. You cannot be friends right away---sometimes it's just too painful. Tell her that in time you can be friends but for now you think it's best for both of you to get some closure and to move on. If she gets upset, don't be surprised but don't cave in because otherwise you'll be living in this really awkward scenario until she finds someone else.
2007-03-10 04:21:24 · answer #1 · answered by Aphrodite 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been down that road already.. It doenst work. U tend to get jealous of one another and end of fighting. I did for to long. I shouldnt have never told him i wanted to be friends.. This was last year that we broke up and he still wont leave me alone. The bad thing is he knows im with someone else and im engaged and he doesnt care. He still thinks im the one for him and that no one else will love me like he does.. I wouldnt do this if i were u.. I know its a hard decision to make when u still have feelings for someone. U both need to sit down and talk about this.. have to be serious about it.
2007-03-10 04:23:13 · answer #2 · answered by blue eyes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you can in time but I really do suggest time away from each other for a while to get over the break up - it will help put your emotions and feelings in check. If you carry on seeing each other as friends now it will be hard when you both start dating again because you are still emotionally attached to each other
2007-03-10 04:22:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Becoming friends after a relationship is hard. Because in order to become like friends *without anymore feeling* it depends on how yall broke up... because it sounds like she likes u alot too since she wants u in her life and she clinging on to u. Basically if u want to be friends then hang out wit her *in a friendly matter* but if u think too many feelings and memories will come back then tell her u, that u dnt think this friend thing is working out.
If u ever need anything else email @: godsbaby42@yahoo.com
*Much Love* **God Bless**
2007-03-10 04:24:07 · answer #4 · answered by Tell Mariee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heres my opinion: if a couple breaks up, its for a reason. I know that if me and my fiancee broke up, i wouldnt be able to be his friend. It would hurt too much! I love him, and if that ever broke.. i would just have to move on. It would hurt for a long time, it would kill me, but in the long run its so much better to just move on. If you just go do your own thing you never have to worry about upsetting your ex or what they will think of it. She obviously either wants you back, or she just doesnt want you to be happy. She is hurting you more by being around! Good luck man =)
2007-03-10 04:24:50 · answer #5 · answered by afireinsidexxx77 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It never works being just friends because one of the people involved normally still has feelings for the other one. Its really hard and when they tell you theyve found someone else you have to act all happy and like it doesnt bother you, but inside you want to scream.
2007-03-10 04:56:48 · answer #6 · answered by fallenangel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am going through the same thing right now. Its me who wants to be friends. Cause he listens and has been in my life for SO long. He just cant keep his fly zipped. So in order to have him in my life I am his friend this dosent mean that I love him any less this just means that my heart is not out on the line to keep getting broke. I am a firm believer that men and women can be friends after they break u. Good Luck to you. Hope everything works out.
2007-03-10 05:54:34 · answer #7 · answered by hotmomma4 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you still have feelings for her you have to tell her you shouldn't see each other for a while. It'll just keep hurting if you do. I'd say 9 out of 10 time "let's just be friends" doesn't work.
2007-03-10 04:26:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can not work for everyone. The best thing to do is to try to move on-but if you want to be friends, talk/chat/text, etc. occasionaly. not everyday. like 2x a week. If you are dreading the time she says I met someone, then find someone first.
2007-03-10 04:21:28 · answer #9 · answered by bratzmom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she's being selfish, not you. It sounds like you have not really made the break at all, either of you...Things DO change when you break up; I don't see how you can remain friends. I occasionally see one of my exs on a social basis, but I don't want to be his friend.
2007-03-10 04:43:39 · answer #10 · answered by marie m 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋