I'm attracted to this guy I used to work with. I still stay in touch with him, but I find myself thinking of him alot. I'm pretty sure that he's bi-curious (yeah I'm a dude), but I don't want to wreck a friendship. I don't know if he's ready to cross over yet. How can I approach this???
2007-03-10 02:19:27 · 23 answers · asked by ? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
@Alexis: What motivated me to become gay is I just found guys (especially the really buff ones) to be just way hotter than women...and more daring and FABULOUS! plus their naughty bits are more interesting..cheerio!
2007-03-10 02:29:47 · update #1
have you tried having a few conversations about this subject of homosexuality with this guy to see how he feels about it (keep it light)? if you find that he is open to the idea then maybe ask him if he would like to get a cup of coffee...let him know that the coffee "date" is so that ya'll can get to know each other better on THIS level.....
2007-03-10 02:30:49 · answer #1 · answered by Erinyes 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Concentrate on your body language, that other people are picking up signals from. If you seem closed, intimidating etc. some people will be less positive about approaching you. Think about how you could appear more open/inviting and you should increase your luck. Smiling opens you up to others too. And keep negative thoughts out of your mind, whilst you're out and about - these will influence what happens. Otherwise, choose the best places to meet guys that you like. Circulating in a straight world, and looking seemingly 'straight', others won't pick up on you as a potential mate. I have had this issue, but am not gonna go 'more gay', in the eyes of the straight world, just to stand out like a billboard. Research gay places, whether bars, clubs etc. Although the bar/club scene is often more about pick-ups (I assume you're looking more for a partner). I'd also consider interest groups - sports, walking etc. These could help increase your circle of gay friends. You may also need to travel around Texas (or elsewhere - California etc), if you're in a place where gay men are thin on the ground. The metro areas have reasonably sized groups. Although I visit Texas a few times a year I don't live there, so am not a Texas expert. Another thought is to keep your sarcastic streak somewhat hidden, until you get to know someone better - sarcasm can be cutting and off-putting to some. Good luck! Rob
2016-03-28 22:39:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi. I'm not gay..but I'd probably approach this the same way I'd approach a girl. Just get to know him some more. Become good friends with him, and since he is bi-curious, ask him how he feels about gay relationships. If he responds positively, or gives you a hint that he would be willing to be apart of a relationship with a man, then I say you should go for it.
2007-03-10 02:26:38 · answer #3 · answered by RKO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you can pursue any relationship whether you are gay or straight is, that you have to think about is this something that you really want to do and will it benefit you in the future, If you and him are friends and want to stay friends then be friends with him, it might after all be the best thing. Even think about what a straight relationship can give you versus a bisexual relationship. Then you can go from there, but it will be a decision that you and you alone will have to make. It might seem like you might already know but are you really sure.
2007-03-10 02:31:43 · answer #4 · answered by gordonflames242003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First lets define the current relationship. Ex co-worker that you say hello to only in passing, ex co-worker whom you pass on a regular basis, or an ex co-worker who is now like any other of your friends and replies to all your e-mails. If he is the latter, I would approach him with this question...(name), may I ask a personal question without offending you? When describing your sexuality, would you use the prefix hetero, bi, or ****? And go from there. If his answer is one that possibly opens a door or at least a window, let him know how you feel and give him an opportunity to respond. That should clear everything up for you.
2007-03-10 02:29:53 · answer #5 · answered by jlsmith 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Going after the same sex gender is pretty hard I suppose. I am not sure how to answer this question BUT I am sure if you asked this same question in the "gay" section of yahoo answers you will get better answers there just being they have probably gone through the same thing you are going through and can help you better.
Good luck.
2007-03-10 02:24:59 · answer #6 · answered by moo shell 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's not your decision to say whether or not he's ready to cross over - you don't know if he is bisexual! You need to be honest with him. Does he know you are gay? You should tell him how you feel - you may lose a good friend but on the other hand you may find yourself in a great new relationship! Good luck! Donna
2007-03-10 02:23:35 · answer #7 · answered by Dee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The thing in that if he is straight he is going to be insulted that you think he is coming off as femmie or giving off gay vibes.
So ask in a way that is all about you being wild about his looks and not about you thinking he might be gay and you should be alright.
2007-03-10 02:35:31 · answer #8 · answered by tenbadthings 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's always a delicate situation to approach a friend with more in mind, no matter of the sexual orientation or one's gender.
If I were you, I would try to talk to him first, sort of steer the conversation towards the sexual topic and see how open he is to things and exactly to what.
Good luck!
2007-03-10 02:23:00 · answer #9 · answered by tamara_cyan 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
talk to him as a friend on the subject without telling him exactly how u feel just to see his point of view.
2007-03-10 02:29:36 · answer #10 · answered by ivelisse 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋