Looking through my boyfriend's phone. He was acting a bit strange with me so my insecurities kicked-in. He gave me the option of leaving and never coming back. I want to stay cause i love him. He was more upset about the principle than actually looking through his phone. Well things ever be the same again?
2007-03-10 01:36:30 · 13 answers · asked by Amber 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes, just give a little time. It isn't right, but I actually have done the same thing, even went so far as to calling the numbers in the phone. And my boyfriend was mad, but he got over it.
2007-03-10 02:23:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what... big deal that you looked through his phone.
IF you two are in a realtionship then you should be allowed to see any part of his life. What secrets is he hiding that he is so worried about you going through his phone. I remember letting my previous girlfriends go through my drawers if they wanted to and even my mail. IF you have nothing to hide it should not matter and if you care about someone so much you should want them to know what is going on in your life and you should feel good that they want to know.
Now, that being said, you should have talked with him about how you felt and why he was acting strange with you. Maybe there is a good reason or maybe it was in your head. Also, you have to wonder why it was you have insecurities to begin with. Either way you should have talked with him and in the future I hope that you talk about your concerns with whoever you are with.
AS for his ultimatum of leaving... Okay, that was a jerk thing to do. If he is so ready to let you go over such a small matter then you should go... and not look back. This attitude of his could be why you have insecurities. What a jerk! IF he really cared he shouldn't be so ready and so quick to be able to let you go... especially over something like this.
It's not like you cheated, slapped his mother or shot his dog. If you were stalking him then I would understand but even my friends and family like to play with my phone and it is because they are bored and not because they are spying. IF he thinks you are spying then what does he have to hide?
Ultimately, you are the one who knows all the details and even then you do not know why he was acting the way he was. You are the best one to decide but in general:
1) Yes, you were wrong in that you didn't just talk with him about why he was acting that way and why you feel insecure.
2) But, he should be happy you care and want you to have access to all his life unless he has something to hide.
3) Most importantly, what a jerk! Start getting ready to move out and live on your own but quietly because he sounds like a jerk who will give you hell if he finds out that you plan to move out.
4) for the future, you need to do some soul searching as to why you have these insecurities and whay you are attracted to men like him before you get into another relationship. You also need to make sure you are happy with yourself and that your life is in order and stable so you do not have to depend on anyone else financially or otherwise because that is giving them power over you and people abuse power.
5) LAstly, before you can be happy with others you need to be happy with yourself.
2007-03-10 01:57:48 · answer #2 · answered by Don Quesadia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes - it will take some time and you will need to explain to him how you feel be more open and honest about everything...i did the same thing with my fiance but I had reason to and after awhile we worked it out he gave me the same option...he's more just upset and hert you dont trust him but he'll get over it ...if he seriously meant it he would have flat out ended it and that would have been it....i know my fiance did the same exact thing once i explained how i felt he explained the option and after a day or2 we were fine... good luck itll work out
2007-03-10 01:45:37 · answer #3 · answered by leanne 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure, but you really need to apologize and treat your guy with respect and recognize boundaries. And he needs to show you the same respect.
This has made you look very insecure and weak. Don't snoop, but if you do find he is cheating dump him without a backward glance.
2007-03-10 01:45:28 · answer #4 · answered by tenbadthings 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can work this out. However if he got that upset I would guess that he really does have something to hide and was upset that he might be busted. If you had nothing to hide he would hand you his phone and let you finish looking
think about what you really want
2007-03-10 01:41:05 · answer #5 · answered by thelmashirley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may not be the type to forgive something like this. Do you really think he's cheating? Because if you do then you need to leave him. It's gonna always be in the back of your mind. Don't let it control you.
2007-03-10 01:45:14 · answer #6 · answered by Solar Ball 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit your boyfriend down and talk to him. Tell him your really sorry that you didn't trust him and that you wish things would go back to the way they were. Really express to him how sorry you are.
2007-03-10 01:44:56 · answer #7 · answered by RKO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think its wrong looking through his phone but anyway if you truly love him and he feels the same way then things will be back the wat they used to be but it might take a while!!
good luck! I hope everything works out!
2007-03-10 01:41:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its human and natural..to do what you did....
especially since he's been acting strange...
i think his reaction is too harsh.....
you can either leave him...
or apologize..and regain trust....
i personally....would walk....because he's overblown
the whole thing....that would probably blow his mind..and teach him a lesson about being harsh.
find someone who is kinder..and more open.
2007-03-10 01:43:29 · answer #9 · answered by manhattanmaryanne 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ur insecure cuz he got touchy that u looked thru his private crap?? very lame scenario, things might be the same if u apologize fer goin thru his private crap, but that probably might not work
2007-03-10 01:44:31 · answer #10 · answered by The Gildclam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋