My wife of 7 years, was behaving very rudely with me for the last 4 months, and didnt allow me any physical intimacy with her. Now I caught her in the web of lies she had spinned, and she accepted that she was having an emotional relationship with her boss. What should I do? I feel I cant trust her anymore, but in some corner of my heart I feel I might have some affection left for her. Can I give her a chance and try to fall in love with her again? Or do you feel a woman who can cheat once on her husband can do it again. Also need to inform we have a 5 year old child.
2007-03-09 19:51:06 · 27 answers · asked by trantor_man 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She quit her job. And has agreed to stay at home and be a housewife. I earn handsomely enough and we dont actually need a double income.
2007-03-09 20:11:59 · update #1
She quit her job. And has agreed to stay at home and be a housewife. I earn handsomely enough and we dont actually need a double income.
2007-03-09 20:12:24 · update #2
She quit her job. And has agreed to stay at home and be a housewife. I earn handsomely enough and we dont actually need a double income.
2007-03-09 20:12:57 · update #3
She quit her job. And has agreed to stay at home and be a housewife. I earn handsomely enough and we dont actually need a double income.
2007-03-09 20:13:34 · update #4
She quit her job. And has agreed to stay at home and be a housewife. I earn handsomely enough and we dont actually need a double income.
2007-03-09 20:13:36 · update #5
Your wife should run away from you as fast as she can and as far as she can. You are a control freak. And you need help.
2007-03-09 19:59:02 · answer #1 · answered by OC 7 · 1⤊ 6⤋
Cheating emotionally is just as bad as bedding the dude, it all lies on wether you believe you can really forgive her and wether she will do it again. Is she willing to change jobs, that would be one question i have for her. But usually if women start an emotional relationship with another man it's because they aren't getting what they needed at home. This is a problem thathappens from the two of you not giving each other enough attention and for that i don't think the women can be the only one to blame. Having a child together doesn't change anything and if you's love each other, you's will work this out and learn from it that you both need to work at the relationship and not just one. Good luck and i hope that you's can resolve the issues that started this whole thing.
2007-03-10 04:01:26 · answer #2 · answered by jimmy_chick78 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She hit rock bottom and admitted to breaking her vows to you. That is a start for her.
You mentioned that you feel you might have something left for her. If you are willing to work on yor marriage, mend and restore, go for it. Forgive her when you can. She needs to ask for your fogiveness.
Try to see why she did what she did. Seek marriage counseling, I prefer Christian counselers. Choose what you like.
If you feel you can do this and try to restore your marriage I think you should. But you need her help as well.
There is always that second chance to cheat again. But you can only do so much. If that did occur then I really believe the relationship has come to an end, because the vows have been broken yet again.
God says that divorce is allowed when adultry has happened in a marrige, but restoring the marriage is possible.
I agree with Him but if it happens again, I would consider an alternative way.
2007-03-13 23:02:36 · answer #3 · answered by Momma Bear 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An affair is something like an Iceburg. You are only seeing the tip of it. There is no advantage for your wife to admit any more than she has too.
The phrase of the moment "Emotional Relationship" is pretty popular right now. I am amazed at how many people are having them. If your Wife felt strongly enough about her Boss that she treated you the way she did. Do you honestly believe that it wasn't physical?
You need to think about things before you take her back. If there wasn't something missing in her heart for you, this "emotional relationship" wouldn't have happened. You know what she is about now. Are you willing to go through this pain again the next time she decides she has found someone more interesting?
Good luck with things.
2007-03-10 04:11:47 · answer #4 · answered by Bill I 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is never a good answer to a question like this, you either have to be willing to look at why she did what she did, see if your heart can withstand maybe this happening again. But don't stay because you have a child, take her back for all reasons and none, unconditional. The best thing to do at this point, think of how it is truly without her, and what a difference it made when you two were together. Then go with your gut feelings not just your heart. And then a story will be told..Have faith in you, its the number one thing to do
2007-03-10 04:15:40 · answer #5 · answered by Miss Green Eyes 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stinks!!
i m a woman . they might do it again . u can't really trust her again . in less , u guys have a good chat . and find out what had happen between u two . she is been unfathful .to her family 9 not only u ) she is not respect u and ur family . she shoudl think of ur feeiling..
sometime something is easy to forgive but can never be forgetton . u should only give her a chace if u see she is really regret and sorry about the whoel thing and promise we make ur relationship better. otherwise.. u will be struggling all the time .
trust is a very important element to a relationship . i hope u will find your way out . and take care of ur kid . (dont; think the kid needs the mom . but really not good for the child if she / he see the parent having bad realtionship .. really bad )
2007-03-10 04:00:48 · answer #6 · answered by juju 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What has your wife accepted?
Cheating doesn't come easy for a woman if she's into you
so,since, she is into the possibility of others, then it's up to you to accept that you may not be the only guy in her life.
If you aren''t the raging jeolous type then the two of you can live together and raise your child but would do better to not to live in a lie or fight the truth. If you can look at the reality of it and work with it , with out feeling emotional turmoil you'll be ok, if you two are up front, establish a few rules out of respect, then both will be able to maintain respect towards each other and the honesty will not hurt you but bring you much closer as friends and family.an affair is basically about sex and our physical and sexual growth and if you look at it for what it is, why deny your best friend what she seeks to feel fulfilled or completed or empowered or just plain ol pleasure. secure people who are openly honest aren't threatened by the act of sex, it's the deciet that hurts . Which also opens doors for you too.
her need to wander goes deeper also, if she can't be honest about what she is going through then you can't trust her.and thats what you need to focus on fixing
2007-03-10 04:15:46 · answer #7 · answered by 2K 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
That is a big decision. You know you will never completely trust her . You will always wonder where she is and what she is doing. You will also drive her crazy. I suppose she does plan on quitting that job? Right? You also have to consider your child. It can be done. It is hard. It will take a lot of work from both of you and she will have to be understanding. You both will have to give 100%. None of this 50/50 stuff. If you both want it bad enough it can work. My heart goes out to you. Go with your heart and have a long heart to heart talk with your lady.
To Olesya C...control freak? Are you kidding me?
2007-03-10 04:00:11 · answer #8 · answered by Jan J 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'd never get back with a person that treated me like crap because they wanted to be with somebody else. She has shown you no respect, worth or dignity so how can you have a serious, trusting & loving relationship with this person? You can't & that's all there is to it. Once a cheat always a cheat. Move on especially for your child so you can role model self esteem & acceptable relationship behaviour. I'm sorry that i'm so opinionated about it but i have just ended a relationship with my partner because of infidelity & we have 2 kids - I think that it's one of the ultimate betrayals. Most importantly you deserve the very best!
2007-03-10 03:59:57 · answer #9 · answered by Mishell 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well cheating is always a difficult thing to contemplate. Why do some do it and others avoid at the risk of death. Statistics tell us that about 50% of all men have cheated and about 63% of all women, at some point during their life. I think that indicates human nature, not sin or weakness, so do what you want, but i don't ultimately think its the end of the world should either party have a little sex on the side.
Yes she is cheating, now ask yourself is it worth the end of your marriage? Take her back, forgive her.
2007-03-10 18:50:42 · answer #10 · answered by Boston Bluefish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haha yeah she quit her job and stays at home now, how convenient for her... Now she has lots of time to hop on the computer and pursue her next affair while you're hard at work at your job telling yourself that everything's ok.
You can give it a chance if you want but keep your eyes and ears open. If after a month or so, you smell something fishy then trust your instincts and face reality.
2007-03-10 04:32:14 · answer #11 · answered by WhooHoo! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋