how can you tell if you are being used by a friend?

Question

okay. my friend is really nice. shes sweet and she tells me everything, i tell her everything. but when it comes to hanging out on the weekends, she always turns me down, and she has a couple of girls over instead. this always makes me so mad. i never thought of it until yesterday when my mother pointed it out, but is she using me? i thought about it and then tried to make myself determine "no" but it didn't work so well. she did tell me yesterday of how when one of her friends was getting some girls together to go to a movie. the other girl named a few of the "cooler" girls at our school and my friend said "oh. dont forget lauren. shes so cool" so i thought she might like me as a friend as much as i like her. i really hope some body can help me figure all of this out before i spend to much of my life with the girl. thanks. (ps many times she has called me her best friend, if this is any consulation)

okay. and its not that she doesn't want to have both me and the other girls. its that i ask her to spend the night and she turns me down and then has other friends over.

Answer 1

She probably does consider you her best friend. I know my best friend and I tell each other everything and only hang out every so often, Like when her brother got married she started hanging out with her sister-in-law and I can't stand her sister-in-law. She went everywhere with her, to the movies, dinner or lunch, rented movies and they always hung out. This made me mad and I said something to her about it and she asked me, Do I tell her my feelings? When I need to cry do I go to her? No I come to you because you are my best friend and she is my sister-in-law. We have been friends for eight years and I know I can count on her and she can count on me. If you see her as your best friend then treat her like your best friend and maybe she'll realize it. And to tell you the truth everybody uses everybody, whether it's to borrow money, relieve some stress or get away from drama and you know if you really thought about it you have used some of your friends too. I know I have.

Answer 2

Some people have friends that are in different Friend circles. And it seems like you aren't considered in all of her circles.

If she is a true friend, conme out and tell her that you are wondering why you aren't included when she is around certian people. Then don't get mad or hurt when she answers you. Just tell her that you need to understand this.

Accept her explaination and either move on or accept that she has different circles of friends.

When it comes to other people........they will let us down.

She might be your best friend in certian ways and not in all ways. Sometimes that is just how life is.

If she is truely being hurtful. then find a different friend. Otherwise accept her as she is.

Answer 3

It sounds like she is ur friend. But she is not using you becuz if she was she wouldnt even talk to you on a regular bases. I think she knows that maybe if all of you get together that something might go wrong and she might be afraid that she will have to choose between you guys and that might make her feel that if you two groups come together there is going to be a feud

Answer 4

Could it be possible that she likes you just fine, but that the other girls don't like you, so she doesn't invite you so your not uncomfortable with them. I'm not sure.
She's not using you unless your doing her homework for her or something. if she is nice to you and doesn't ask you for favors all the time, then she's not using you. She just seems like more of an "in school" friend than a social friend to me. What I mean by that is, when she is around you in school she likes you and talks to you, but when it comes to social events, she has more in common with other girls.

Answer 5

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.
FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
REAL FRIENDS: Would sit next to you sayin "Damn we ****** up.but that **** was fun!"
FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
REAL FRIENDS: Keep your **** so long they forget its yours.
FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you.
FAKE FRIENDS: Are for a while.
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.
FAKE FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
REAL FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "***** drink the rest of that you know we don't waste."
FAKE FRIENDS: Will talk **** to the person who talks **** about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Will knock them the **** out.

Answer 6

She is using u, She knows she could tell u what ever she ones and u will leasing but she spend more fun with other people. Talk to her Why she been turning u down. Are u guys differnt ages? maybe your parents dont let u go were she whant to go.

Answer 7

if u were truly her best friend wouldn't u also be invited to go on the weekends with the other girls. just distance yourself for awhile, than u will see how much she likes u. friends come and go, if your friend can't stand up to her other friends and be able to include u too, she is not much of a friend.

Answer 8

When you become broke, and you are left out on the streets @ 4 in the morning.

Answer 9

Just because she calls you a best friend doesnt mean you are. You can label ppl but actions speak louder than words. If you feel it in your heart that she is using you, dump her *** and tell her.

Answer 10

Sounds like she is your friend. Maybe she does not invite you over because she is not sure that you and her other friends will click good. Good luck to you and remember to follow your instincts they are usually right.