Can you give me an opion about the begining of my story is it good or bad and rating 1-10?

Question

"Let me ask you a question boy, Do you find this funny this whole 4 years of training?" asked the old man. "I'll tell you what i find funny that im going through this training and have been going throught it for three years already i know i can beet any thing you trow at me weather it be a wizord a witch or any thing that is like it.". Said the boy. will fine then will duel," said the old man. Wa-what you've got to be kiding, I cant fight you." "o but i thought you coulld beat anyone no matter how powerful they are," said the old man sarcastily "well fine then with wands or with out," asked the boy. "It dose not mater," said the old man. The old man got in his stance that Mark Had seen before. "Are You ready Mark," asked the old man. "Why yes i am Jonathan," said the boy. Ive told you before never to speak you treains- Mark ingored im and couted down from 3. as soon as soon as Mark said 1 The old man muterd something that Mark could not hear But he saw a blue flash and said "block"

hey i know its not the best grammar but im 14 and just want to know what you think of it and i was typing kind of fast so give me a brake

Theres More
Cont
Mark blocked the spell but not by much he yelled out the spell noma the old man defleced the spell and sent it right back at Mark and then sent another spell at mark he did not have time to deflet both but did get one and was hit by one thats when everything went blank
Thats the end of chapter 1 if you want me to write more of the story write it in you anwser

im telling you people i dont care about grammar or spelling just read it as well as you can and rate it and tell me what you think of it i dont have time to read all these coreactions and stuff

Hey people judging frome the bad reviews i dont think that anyone will want me to write more but tell me in your anwsers just say yes i do want you to write mor or no i dont want you to write more after you say what you think and the rating

Answer 1

I think that you should write if you want to write. It doesn't matter what people here have to say. Most of them are Grammar nazis just looking to stroke their egos. You are 14 years old. Good grammar will come with practice, and even if it doesn't, that's just fine. Did you know Avi has dysgraphia? His handwriting is impossible to descipher. Yet he is an amazing writer. It doesn't matter what the words are, just what they're saying.

Please don't stop writing. So many people are just dull followers, we need creativity and individualism!

Answer 2

2

Answer 3

5

Answer 4

Don't post a story with terrible grammar and spelling and expect people to not comment on the errors. It drags the whole story down. You have to learn to deal with criticism when you ask for it. Anyways, I agree that this story is alright. However, it is under no circumstances, worthy to be published. My reason: It is basically Harry Potter with different names. You would be begging for lawsuits. I would give it:
Composing: 4/10
Written Expression: 5/10
Usage / Mechanics 2/10

Answer 5

Don't worry, son, even I don't have the time to make all the corrections, but you better turn on the spellcheck and check your grammar. I think you need to be much more concise. Here's a suggestion:
After completing three years of intensive training, Mark swaggered with confidence. "I challenge you to a dual, old man," he boasted. "You may choose the weapons." "Are you ready to begin?" asked the old man with a gleam in his wise eyes. " "On the count of three," taunted Mark as Jonathan took his stance, proudly, glinting in the boy's direction. Mark lunged on the count of one, the old man whispered something he could not hear, and Mark was dazzled by a flash of blue.
I commend your love of writing. Keep it up, but work on the punctuation and grammar. I'd give you a 7 for content, but the story still needs work. [IMHO]

Answer 6

5. Your basic idea isn't bad, but, as others have noted, your intro would be a lot clearer with some spelling/grammar corrections. Stick with it and try to come up with some more descriptive elements as well. What is the scene itself? Surroundings etc. Internal dialogue? Switching point of view etc. Good luck

Answer 7

for the AC person response above- you spelled AT LEAST wrong so try and use spell check yourself before you go around criticizing other people's errors.

for the record use spell check when you make your final copy and things should turn out well. i love writing too so keep on writing. it seems pretty intersesting so far.

Answer 8

The story is ok, but your spelling, grammar and sentence structure need a lot of work. No one will read it no matter how good it is if you can't write English.

Answer 9

3

Potential for a good story.

Needs something more to grab the audiences attention.

(and spelling and grammer need some work to!)

Answer 10

I like it!! I'd give it a 9. Pretty interesting. Reminded me of Naruto, always dueling. Don't give up, no matter what all these other people answer you.