Girls: What should i do .......?

Question

i am 18 yrs old and my girlfriend is pregnant with my baby... i work and am saving money for my kid... the thing is i dont really see no future with her... because of the way she is i have tried to wait to see if maybe she'll change her attitude... my pride says to stay with her and wait for her to change and my heart says leave her.... what should i do........

Answer 1

The first answerer is partly right. If you're not willing to accept the consequences of your actions, then you shouldn't be doing the deed.

With that out of the way... You need to be there for your baby. For the next 18 years (at least) your life is not your own anymore. You live now to make sure your child had the best life he/she can have. Do not abandon them.

If you're not happy with your girlfriend, then tell her that you don't think you can picture a future with her. Tell her you want to be in the baby's life, but you can't be with her. Try to make this as amicable as possible because now, whether you like it or not, you're tied to her. You share a child together and that means that you'll have to deal with each other for years to come.

But try to make it work. You made the decision to have sex. You need to face the repercussions and not run away from them.

Answer 2

This sounds like a big thing for an 18 yr-old. But since it has already happened, take responsibility of the situation like an adult and seek the best solution for you, your girlfriend and your baby.

A new life is innocent and it is really a blessing from God. This means that you and your girlfriend may need to adjust your state of mind to be a giver and provider to the new life - Your baby's needs and a future healthy growth will have to come first before your own.

Try talking with your girlfriend about the future you've envisioned this to be with her and your baby, and highlight that each has a role to play to make this work. If you can both look beyond this temporary set back, and when the baby is out, you will realized that it's all worthwhile. Your decision today maybe a major influence to your baby's future..you, your girlfriend, and perhaps both your families can come together to make this work.

You definitely have my blessings!

Answer 3

You must always always follow ur heart.... I mean u could always try to work it out for the baby, but alot of the time that leads to arguing in front of the kid, which is not good! So, I know it would suck to leave her when she's pregnant and all...but, you cant help it if you see no future! Sometimes things just dont work out how we hoped or planned! Thats life..you take the good with the bad adn just keep on goin! But lifes too short, so have fun while you can. Live your life to the fullest and dont let anybody drag you down or stop you from being you! Learn from your experiences, but live with no regrets. So, jsut relax and enjoy the ride buddy! Oh, and congrats on the baby!! Everything will work out just fine. Even if you do get a new gf....but dont just stay with her because shes havin your kid...you can still be the babys daddy. Like I said..arguing and stuff in front of the kid is not good for him/her at all. So good luck on your next journey in life! It'll be a fun one! Remember...that kid will be your life. You have no more social life..it is now all to your child! It will be a great joy in life though!

Answer 4

I would suggest you do what your heart's telling you to do. Trust me, once your baby's born you'll see everything else in a different light.. You really can't wait around for people to change, because sometimes they don't change.

You should now do what would be in the best interest of your child, and yourself. Forget her, the only thing that will bind you two together will be the baby, at your gae you really don't need to worry about what she's doing and what she's not doing, i'm sure that if she's capable of having a baby, she's capable of making it on her own. As long as you're doing what's right, nothing else matters. Things will look up, you'll see.

Just because you got her pregnant doesn't mean you have to stay with her forever. Just keep a good relationship with her for the baby's sake and move on, you can find something better.

Answer 5

While she may be pregnant, but if it is not working out, there is no sense in making either of you unhappy. Its often been said that you should not stay together for the kids. This is true even in your situation, the child will know (they are far from stupid) and you risk them resenting the both of you, and possibly blaming themselves.
You can still be a huge part of the baby's life, if you two can see it easy to part freindly, then it shouldnt be a problem at all.
I broke up with my ex just after I found out I was pregnant, although a different situation, he wasnt ready, and hasnt seen his son since the baby was 6 months (he is now 9).

Answer 6

The fact is that if you have a child together you will (should) always be a part of each other's lives but if you don't love her now you will probably never "grow" to love her and getting married (or whatever) is never a good idea for any reason except for love.

You can still be a part of your child's life even if you are not with the mother. The child will be much better off with 2 happy but separated parents than he or she will be with parents that are together but miserable.

How does your girlfriend feel about your relationship? If she feels the same way then don't try to make it into something that it is not. Just be good parents to your child and remain civil to each other your child will be much better off in the long run.

Answer 7

The most important thing for you to do is to focus on being a good parent to your child. You are young and should not enter into marriage or remain in a dead-end relationship for the sake of the child. However, give the mom a little time. Pregnancy can take a toll on a woman both physically and emotionally. After the baby is born, you may feel better prepared to make a decision about the future of your relationship with mom. For now, I say hang in there!

Answer 8

You are quite young , although you are having a child. If you do not see a future with her now, then you have to ask yourself what will she have to change to become someone that you may want to have a future with. It appears as though you feel obligated and of course that has never been enough for a future together. You need to also give yourself time to know what you really want. Take care of your child's needs for the time being and focus on that, you will understand more about yourself within the next few years. No more children please until you are in a serious relationship and you plan on them.

Answer 9

well, regardless of whtever you do, you shoudl have a talk with your girlfriend and tell her what's bothering you, even if it is something about her attitude. maybe i fyou let her know, she can try and work on it and then you guys can provide a loving home for the child. since she is pregnant, you have to consider the child's well-being as well as your own and the girl's. regardless of whatever you decide to do, make sure you contribute for the child. it's unfair for you to just leave your gf, especially when she is pregnant and let her ruin her life by trying to raise a child if she is not able to do so alone.

a better question is, why didn't you think about whether you wanted to stay with her or not BEFORE you two created a baby. .

if you do decide that you don't want to stay, let her know in advance, so she can plan accordingly.

again, remember that a third LIFE is involved here---it's not just about you and gf anymore.

Answer 10

You need to reassure her you will be there for her and the baby but you need to tell her you don't see a future in the relationship. You need to sort this out before the baby is born.
Tell her you will be at the birth and all important events in your childs life and you will spend quality time with the child but you just can't continue in the current way.
She may be angry at first but reassure her you will love this child and will always have a special spot for her as she is the mother of your child but you don't love her enough to only hurt her down the track by putting this off.