What do you if you get a bad reference?

Question

My ex-boss is a real bully and on my last day hardly spoke to me at all, despite the fact that we were the only two people in the office! Now, I have had to give his name as a referee, I have contacted him to let him know, but he hasn't returned my calls or email, I'm nervous that he will give me a less than great reference and this will hinder my chances on securing a new opportunity. Please advise!

Answer 1

legally he is not allowed to bad mouth you, he can only refuse to give you a reference.

if he does bad mouth you, take him to court.

Answer 2

Kully,

You don't have to use your former boss has a reference. Most likely though, he will give you at least a decent reference. There are two scenarios here.

The first scenario, and the most likely, is that despite bullying you, he will give you a good reference. Some bosses believe that bullying or harassing is the way to get the most out of employees. Whether or not that is true is not the point. That's just his style. But often, when it comes to a reference, they say good things about you! Why? Because you no longer work for them, so he has nothing to gain by preventing you from getting another job. The bullying was just a persona to get motivate you while youworked there. Unless you did something that really PO'd him and he is the vengeful type, he's likely to give you a good reference. In the least, he won't say anything that will hurt your chances.

The other scenario is that he declines to give you a reference. You PO'd him or he's the weird "vengeful" type. This is unlikely but I admit, it can happen. In this case, you try to get a reference from someone else in the office. Usually HR will do this or your boss' manager. Failing that, try a coworker. Worst case, you can't get one. Then you tell the interviewer, "I had a bad experience at that job" or "I can't use my former boss as a reference" and explain that you had a bad working relationship with him. Don't try to sound like your blaming him entirely for it. Sound neutral about it. You just didn't get along, personalities didn't mix. Then point out that you have solid references from other jobs and managers. Most interviewers know that at some point we all encounter a manager we can't work for. So long as it's just one, don't worry about it, it's normal.

I've had this happen once where an interviewer had worked at the same previous employer. He wanted to know who my manager was. I deflected the question at first but he came around and asked again. I confessed, "I had a bad experience there!" and explained it. Surprise! So did the interviewer! LOL!! He then asked if there was another manager there who could give me a reference. We started going over names and BINGO, we found one we both knew. I got a good reference!

BTW, a number of persons answered above that it's illegal for employers to give bad references on former employees. That's incorrect. So long as what they say is true and can be proved, an employer is perfectly entitled to give a bad reference. The reason employers typically don't give bad references is the legal cost and hassle if a former employee sues. It's a particular situation in the legal world where the buden of proof falls largely on the defendant (former employer) rather than the former employee. The former employee only has to prove that A) the potential employer checked their reference with the past employer B) the past employer said something bad C) they didn't get the job. That's it and then the former employer is forced to prove that what they said was true and that's a BIG JOB in court! It's costa lot fo money, time and hassle to buld that kind of defense. So, it's just better to avoid potential litigation and either say something not too bad about the former employee or nothing at all. Declining to give a reference is OK in the legal world. It's neutral so it's viewed as not hurting the employee's chances of gaining work (but it doens't help either!) But, legally, the former employer's butt is covered.

Best,
-- Liam

Answer 3

Generally in a reference they only ask for details such as when you started with the company, when you left, what your attendance/timekeeping were like. It doesn't go into anything personal, so your ex boss should keep any personal grievances about you out of it, or legally you could sue him.

Depending on the size of your company, it may be the HR manager who provides the reference as they would have the relevant details. If your boss chooses not to provide a reference and there is no-one else at the company that you can ask to complete one then just be honest with your new company about your ex boss. Don't make it sound like you are slagging him off or anything, but explain that there was a clash of personalities and it was one of the reasons that you decided to leave. If you come across well enough in an interview they will appreciate your honesty.
The other option is to provide alternative people for references, i.e employers before the last one, personal references etc.
I wouldn't worry too much about it, I'm sure that you will be fine.

Answer 4

Hi,

you don't say which country you are living/working in and employment law differs from country to country.

There are ways of giving poor references without infringeing any of these laws in the UK and in the USA. One way is to merely write that the person needing the reference was 'satisfactory' or that his/her performance was 'adequate'. These statements will not be untrue, yet will not give a glowing picture to the person asking for the reference.

If you ex-boss (who sounds a little childish, to say the least) actually lies about your performance and ability it is possible to sue through various employment tribunals for recompense. Most bosses are aware of the possibility of being sued, so will not actually lie...but if he does...

However, obviously your real fear is that of getting a bad reference in the first place, so that your prospective employer will be persuaded not to employ you. Perhaps, if the job is a good one, the best method would be to write to your prospective employer (best to see him/her if that is possible) and explain, without criticising your ex-boss too much, that your ex-boss acted irrationally when you told him you were leaving (possibly because he would miss your services too much?) and that you fear a less than glowing reference.

Bosses (old and new) are all human, and realise that occasionally people will act irrationally...don't appear TOO concerned about the reference...just explain how your ex-boss acted.

It may help. There is another way of giving a bad reference without criticising the ex-employee. It is less common than the 'satisfactory', etc, but sometimes very effective and, if used you would not win a tribunal case over it.

With this method you give an absolutely 'over the top' glowing reference, say how devastated you are to be losing your best employee, how the business will suffer because you are no longer there, how he'd take you back in an instant with a huge rise...well, you get the picture? Any prospective employer reading this drivel will think that the person was so bad the ex-boss would write anything to get rid of him.

It is not a common method, but if you went to a tribunal they would read the glowing report of your employment history and say, 'Why are you unhappy about this...it's very complimentary' (which of course it is!)

Whatever you choose, I hope you are lucky with your application and that you'll be happy in your new job.

Cheers, hope this helps,

BobSpain

Answer 5

By law your ex boss cannot give you a bad reference - he can however decide not to give you a reference at all this then leaves your new employers open to draw their own conclusions.

best advice is to explain the situation to the new employer and offer them contact details for a personal or character reference - ideally someone of good standing who has known you for over 5 years and is not related to you.

Good luck

Answer 6

A reference is a guideline for quick reading. An employer wants to base your ability's on YOU as long as you can make perspective employers see how you really are and act your reference has no real bearing. Don't worry, but if it bothers you then explain to the employers that he was unfortunately a bad employer with no respect for employees.

Answer 7

It is actually illegal to give someone a bad reference... The correct way about it is, as an employer, to refuse to give a reference for that person.

So, if you must give his name, explain situation to future employes, and state he may refuse to give one because he's bitter about you leaving.

Good luck!!! and looks like you made the right choice leaving his company!!

Answer 8

Just be honest with your possible new application that you left your job because the boss was not a "great" person to work with.
This site also helps if you want to just get your "name" out there and your experience.

Good Luck

Answer 9

He is not allowed to say anything bad about you, he can only refuse to give you a reference. But if he does refuse then just explain to the person what he was like without trying to sound to bitchy. good luck.

Answer 10

I'm not positive about my answer but I have always been told that your ex-employer is only allowed to give your date of hire and your last date of work. Some kind of law????

Answer 11

Tell your ex-boss to grow up and stop being a tart, if he doesn't agree to give you the reference you deserve then in my opinion the only other alternative is to not use him and find somebody else.

(Or just do a moody one)