Movie date, do girls really want an arm around them?

Question

I have been on several -pretty- good dates with about 3 different girls. All of which have been to the movies. Two I screwed up pretty bad and realized it later because of them never talking to me.

We had a wonderful time but I assumed it was because I never put my arm around them during the movie, thus creating a sort of non-interest attitude? The girl I did do this to turned out pretty well, nothing further but I did not pursue it.

Do you girls always want an arm around you on the first date with a guy to a movie?

Oh, why dont they? It feels really uncomfortable just sitting there....Or even holding hands?

Oh, thanks Jacky, don't post if your going to be rude. It was their idea to go. And yea we did hug on those first two and never touched during the movie. I was very charming and they both enjoyed it very much.

Answer 1

Although there is a stereotypical notion that you should put your arm around a girl during a movie, this is completely untrue.

Here's some hints;

1. First date is not a movie. It is a coffee/drink. This is because it can go for as long or as short as yourself or your date would like it too. Additionally it is in a more public area, so your date will not feel pressured/insecure.

2. When your arm goes around a girl who is sitting in a cinema seat, two things happen. One is that the girl gets an uncomfortable thing on top of her shoulders or behind her back, and the other is that you place yourself in an uncomfortable physical position. While the gesture may be appreciated, it's only in the "thought that counts" way.

I think your main concern should be figuring out why you yourself didn't realise that the first girls didn't like you, but only realised it afterwards.

So your answer is:

If you are on a first date, you don't immediately assume you can touch the girl. Using this logic you shouldn't put your arm around them, regardless of whether you are in a cinema or not. If they are comfortable with your arm around them, you shouldn't do it at the cinema because it is uncomfortable.

Edit:

Re: Your second comment,

That uncomfortable feeling you have while "just sitting there" is what a movie experience is about during the first couple of dates. It can be uncomfortable for a lot of people having any physical touch during a first date. If you do choose to go to a movie, it should be about the tension of being so close together for such a period of time. Believe me, she'll be feeling it too.

Answer 2

i would want it from a man i have feelings for and relationships with, but definitely not from a guy with whom i am on the first date. and by the way, first date as a movie sucks. maybe that was the reason girls didn't talk with u any more, not because u didn't put your arm around them? movie dates suck

Answer 3

Put it this way, if YOU were going out with friend who's bigger and hairier than you , to the movies would you want HIS arm wrapped around your back?
Try NO physical contact except the Hug at the end of the date..
works everytime...IF she's interested..NO KISSES...

Answer 4

A probably a sign to show that you are comfortable being around them and not afraid to do PDA like holding hands.

Answer 5

NO! Keep your arms to yourself until later when you get coffee after the movie.

Answer 6

its differnt for each person. if your like really close with the person then yeah put your arm around her but like if your not then dont lol its really up to the girls personallity

Answer 7

depends if shes feeling you or not... try putting your hand on her thigh its less obvious, because if it doesnt turn out right you can play it off as a accident

Answer 8

nope some people feel uncomfortable

Answer 9

i dont like it. it makes me feel uncomfortable.

Answer 10

depends