i have a 3 year old daughter who loves her stepdaddy?

Question

Hes been taking care of her since 1, but she loves to take showers with him, at what age should i stop letting my husband see her nude?

Answer 1

As long as you feel you can trust him in the shower with her dont worry about it. She wont want to shower with him forever and will stop when she is ready.

Answer 2

Whew - you asked a doozy hey?!

Well, like some have said - it is all about the family and their beliefs. If you make a big deal out of it, it will be. If you don't say much about nudity, it just becomes a natural thing.

My own personal experience, I decided that my eldest son would stop taking showers with me when he was around 5. And now that he is six, I tell him that he's a big boy now and can wash him self up because I should be able to give him his privacy at this point. He has no worries though, he'll still ask me to wash him up or jump around the room after his shower naked as a jay-bird. It's just really me not making it a big deal. I'm his mother and he trusts me.

If you trust your husband and your daughter hasn't made a stink about his "parts" yet, then relax. You're still okay. When the questions arise, then that's the time to call it quits.

Besides, most of the time she's probably playing in there and not really paying much attention to daddy anyway. At least that's what my son did. The toys were more interesting than me!

Answer 3

That's a tough one. I'm not sure the question is your husband seeing your daughter nude, but more the question of her seeing him nude.

In some families nudity is considered really natural and comfortable.

In my family it was not. So I don't ever remember seeing my dad nude, nor do I care to. Not that I am saying you are doing anything wrong, just that it's beyond my level of comfort.

If she is getting to an age where you are starting to question the practice of them bathing together, then it's time to stop.

There are hundreds of other activities that they can do together that do not involve his naked body parts. He can continue to bathe her until she's of an age when she will need her own privacy. Some girls need that at age 6 and some not until age 7 or 8. Most girls prefer not to be naked in front of dad or brothers by age 8 though.

Still...I know a family that has "Naked Night" and they all sit around watching movies, eating pizza, etc. ALL naked. The mom, dad and kids.

It's not sexual but a comfortable practice for them.

Don't listen to the people who say you are sick or wrong. It's just a matter of preference.

Answer 4

Now would be a good time to stop that. Start the bubble bathes. As far as your husband seeing her nude she's still very little and I'm sure there's times when he has to change her or take her to the bathroom, that shouldn't be an issue unless you believe there is a reason to make one. She will start developing some modesty when she gets another year older.

Answer 5

It really depends.

My cousins step dad raised her from a baby and they showered together. Nobody cared, and she was the one who finally decided that she didn't want boys to see her naked.

But in my household, me and my dad were VERY close when I was younger, and he would never dream of me even being in the room while he was being the closed shower curtain.

It is completely about comfort levels. My cousin can remember the showers with her stepdad, and she is 18. She isn't hurt by it at all because it was never turned into a sexual thing in the family. Since it was never even thought of that way, there is no reason for her to be scarred by the memory.

If anyone, including you, are uncomfortable with the showering arrangment, it needs to stop. Children can pick up on the discomfort and THAT can lead to issues.

Answer 6

You know this might be a touchy question. But my Dad (my step Dad) raised me since I was 6 months old. ANd I know he loves me like I was his own. And my sister's husband has also adopted her daughter from birth (bio-logically not his daughter) now I believe that your husband probably has the best intentions and loves her like his own. But you also want to be careful. At 3 your daughter is getting aware of her own sexuality and the differances between male and female. I would say personally for modesty. I wouldn't want my daughter to see my husband naked. But of course as her Daddy he may want to help giving her baths and help getting her in her PJ's but at age 3 I would start weaning off showers together. Just my opnion/ I don't allow my son to see me naked and he is 3 and my daughter is 18 months old and she doesn't see her Daddy naked. My three year old is aware that sissy doesnt have boy parts etc....so I think now might be wise. I hope that helps.

Answer 7

Being a close family is important, but if you have any doubts at all, like right now, address the husband. You needn't explain anything to the daughter, because she's just a kid. This really shouldn't be a big deal. It's like- when does one stop bathing the babies in the sink. It's all natural, so, you know. You could also ask a doctor, and see what his/her opinion is.

Answer 8

we never made a habit out of showering with the kids. But sometimes it was easier to just throw them in with one of us if we were in a hurry. My hubby put a stop to our daughter showering with him when she was about 1 1/2. It was the day (out of curiosity) she reached right up and gave a tug. I remember going into the bathroom and her hanging outside the shower curtian dripping wet and him having a bright red face. I really think its all about comfort level, some have more than others.

Answer 9

I would say now because I have a three year daughter my self and when she would take a shower with me she would say to my family my mommy has a big butt, I see my mommys boobies. That is not what you would want people to hear. He should be able to bathe her just not let her take a shower with him. I under stand completely want three year old come up with. Just tell her big girl take bathes my them selves which of course you will be in the bath room with her. She will love that she is becoming a big girl and you notice what a big girl she is.

Answer 10

I have a 5 month old son that I take in the shower but I'd stop that when he's about 3. It's different when you're the mother, but it's another when you're the father and you're taking a shower with your daughter. He should've stopped that at 1 1/2.

Answer 11

If the shower is just like a special time for them together just start letting them wear bathing suits. Then give separate baths to clean up. My garden bathtub becomes more like an indoor hot tub with my kids. 5, 5, and 3. They love getting in the bath with me. We have special swimsuits that just stay in the bathroom.