how long should a man last during sex?

Question

im not trying to be a pervert but my husband is the first guy i have ever had sex with. when we have sex he only lasts less than a minute!! why is this? he says its because im really "tight" but i dont think so?

I am not his first. He only lasts seriously 45 seconds if that! He claims that after he c*ms that it goes limp or its too sensitive to keep goin, but it still looks hard to me. Is this condidered premature ejaculation?

Answer 1

your man must learn ejaculation control

Faced with involuntary ejaculation, most men try to distract themselves during intercourse, believing that by thinking about other things, they can trick themselves into lasting longer. Usually, that only makes things worse.

Don't tune out your body. TUNE INTO IT. You need to become more familiar with your different levels of sexual arousal. You also need to recognize how you feel as you approach your point of ejaculatory inevitability, the "point of no return." Once you recognize how you feel close to your point of no return, it's not difficult to make small sexual adjustments that allow you to remain highly aroused without ejaculating.

Sexual arousal is a four-phase process. In the Excitement Phase, breathing deepens and erection begins. In the Plateau Stage, erection becomes full and you feel highly aroused. When arousal builds to a certain point, the next phase occurs, Orgasm with Ejaculation. Then during the Resolution Phase, breathing returns to normal and erection subsides. The key to ejaculatory control is to extend the Plateau Phase, to maintain arousal without triggering Orgasm and Ejaculation.

To learn ejaculatory control:

* Don't use drugs or alcohol. They're distracting and they interfere with the self-awareness crucial to learning ejaculatory control.
* Appreciate whole-body sensuality. Men often think sex happens only in the penis and only during intercourse. That view is a one-way ticket to uncontrolled ejaculation (not to mention erection problems, and women with those proverbial headaches). The best sex involves head-to-toe arousal. Men learning how to approach -- but not arrive at -- their point of no return, need to appreciate whole-body sensuality, the pleasure potential in every square inch of the body. Whole-body sensuality releases tension. Tense bodies that have no other outlet often find release through involuntary ejaculation. But as you learn to appreciate sensual pleasure from head to toe, whole-body arousal takes the pressure off your penis, and you last longer.
* Whole-body sensuality means relaxation, but the "relaxation" involved in great sex is not the kind that includes an easy chair, a six pack, and Monday Night Football. It's the kind you feel after a hot bath or a good massage. In fact, bathing or showering together before lovemaking can help men relax and appreciate whole-body sensuality -- and last longer.
* Breathe deeply. One very easy way to stay relaxed while making love is to breathe deeply. The body has a natural tendency to breathe deeply during sex. But many men fight it. They think they should stay in control by not breathing deeply and making the little love-moan sounds that go along with it. But when men work to control their breathing, they often sacrifice ejaculatory control. Try breathing deeply. Let your breath go. Many men are amazed how much this one little change improves their ejaculatory control.
* Start with masturbation with a dry hand. By varying how you caress your penis, you can learn to stay highly aroused for quite a while without coming. When you feel yourself approaching your point of no return, simply back off a bit, strokestroke yourself more gently or not at all, and stay aroused without ejaculating. Then as you feel yourself getting a little distance from your point of no return, return to more vigorous self-stimulation. Repeat this several times over several sessions. Approach your point of no return, then back off. For most men, it doesn't take long to develop good ejaculatory control while alone.
Then move on to masturbation with a lubricated hand. Use saliva, vegetable oil, or a commercial sexual lubricant. For most people, lubricants increase the sensual intensity of erotic fondling. Follow the same program: Masturbate until you approach your point of no return, then back off. Repeat this several times over several sessions.
* Once you have good control during masturbation, and appreciate whole-body sensuality, and feel comfortable breathing deeply during lovemaking, then you're ready for the couples program -- if you're in a couple. The couple approach is called the "Stop-Start Technique." First, arrange "stop" and "start" signals with your lover, for example, a light pinch or tap, or a tug on an ear.
Then, your lover strokes your penis by hand as you lie still. When you approach your point of no return, give the "stop" signal. Your lover immediately stops stroking you and simply holds your penis gently, as you continue to breathe deeply and pays close attention to the sensations you're feeling. When you no longer feels close to ejaculation, gives the "start" signal, and your lover begins stroking you again. How many stops and starts should you do? A half-dozen over a 15-minute period works well for most couples. Do what feels comfortable for you.

With stop-start, the focus is on the man. He's the one learning the new skill. But don't forget the woman's sensual needs. As part of each practice session, she might guide your hand over her to show you what she likes.

Once you've gained good ejaculatory control with your lover's hand, try the same stop-start procedure with oral caresses. Again, you begin by lying still.

Once you've gained good control orally, feel free to start moving. You're making love again -- but now you have ejaculatory control. Congratulations.

Here are some other suggestions for lasting longer:

Answer 2

Frankly, that's less than average time a man takes. But don't worry, extend your foreplay, and when he ejaculates for the first time, keep him stay in till he rises again... he'll last longer this time. Alternately, after the first go you may please yourself with conversation, a drink or something then making him ready for the second time, that will last longer and please you more.. and hopefully you get your climax as well. If such things fail, its venereal dysfunction and if he is not on any nitrate medication, he may try Viagra. But better still he might seek medical advice.

Answer 3

Okay you have a "2 minute man" I feel bad for you . Here a technique that you and your husband can do together. Start by getting your husband hard okay! and start masterbating him and just as he about to pop off hold the very tip of his p*nis and don't let go. Let it go back down now I need for you to repeat this several time. This will train your husband brain(second brain) that hes not c*mming. This should stop his pre-mature accidents. Also go to your local "CVS" or "Walgreen" and purchase a product called "MANDELAY" every porn star uses this for long lasting erection.

Answer 4

I'm sure you are...lol...but even if that is the case he should be able to last longer...I myself last only about 10 to 15 minutes on average. I would try things like lots of foreplay for both of you before intercourse.. Take care of him first..maybe a bj or sumtin..then have him get you close before he puts it in..maybe then he'll last a lil longer and you can c.um a lil quicker...

Answer 5

dont worry your man is trying to take pressure off him, he could last longer if he tried, its all mental work if your man concentrated on you more then himself during sex that i think is more important that you as his woman should reach orgasm 1st but the problem is generally women lie alot so its hard for us guys to tell, if you be honest with him and try to change your mentality and his i am pretty sure things will work out, good luck on this remember their are other people who have better answers

Answer 6

Be realistic 5-10 min average

Answer 7

Usually about 15 minutes thats enough time for everyone to get there pleasure. A tip to help you out would be for you to maybe give him oral sex before you have sex because it takes longer for the second ejaculation, or to concentrate on the foreplay and make sure you get yours before he gets his

Answer 8

The guy should last as long as it takes for the women to get hers. If he isn't lasting that long, he's not doing you, nor himself, justice. He can learn to last longer or otherwise make sure you are pleased and content.

Answer 9

anywhere between a few seconds to hours =) ; it all depends on the circumstance surrounding the situation. If you're newly married, give it a little bit more time, it will improve eventually, but if this situation has being going on for a long time, i guess it's time for your husband to visit the urologist, he may be having a premature ejaculation (PE).

Answer 10

1

Answer 11

Guys average 5 minutes. I make it so the first time I *** is under a minute, after that I keep the erection and can continue at least 15 minutes.