Should I keep him or let him go?

Question

I am 19 and have been dating my boyfriend for nearly two years. When I met him he was a full-time employee while i was a full-time student and my parents were helping to support me financially. After two months of dating he moved into my apartment as he was living with his uncle and aunt. Although he had income he never contributed or offered to contribute financially to living expenses. About a year ago he decided to take out a loan for nearly $20,000 so he could quit his job and go to school. None the less all the money was gone in less than 5 months and he failed all his classes, that brings us up to this past december. He attempted to reapply for a loan and was denied because the previous loan was supposed to last for an entire year, so for the past three months I have been covering all the bills, including his cell phone bill and car payment which has left little other money. He does help a lot around the house and is a lot of fun to be around, just not sure what to do

Where the large complexity arises is that I am currently pregnant with his child and don't want to raise a child in a single-parent home if i can avoid it, so i may be stupidly trying to prolong the inevitable to make things work for as long as i can for the sake of the baby.

Where the large complexity arises is that I am currently pregnant with his child and don't want to raise a child in a single-parent home if i can avoid it, so i may be stupidly trying to prolong the inevitable to make things work for as long as i can for the sake of the baby. He has just got a job about a week ago, it pays just a little over minimum wage.

Answer 1

he's using you. tell him either he helps pay the bills or you're going to kick him out. it's not fair to you to take all the financial responsibility. i did this with my ex and when we broke up i wondered how i could ever afford anything myself. and then i realized i was supporting two people, so one is nothing compared to two. fun is not an excuse. you will find someone who is fun to be around and responsible at the same time. just tell him he needs to take responsibility for his stuff. you aren't his mother and he's not a child.

Answer 2

I'd stick with your boyfriend for maybe 2 more months just to see where you guys will end up. If things aren't going too well dump him and move on. Money and chores, you are both still working together. You pay the bills and he cleans the house. Even if it's his phone you should care enough to pay that bill because you are a couple now. If you decide to stick with him for a longer time you should try finding some other way to make some ca$h! :D Do NOT ever let your parents get involved it's your live. You need to learn maturity, take a stand, and have some independence in your life very much like myself. :D
Peace
Love
Kara

Answer 3

Sorry but he sounds like a loser. The fact that he doesn't mind mooching off a woman says a lot about him as a man-- or, as him not being a real man. I don't understand why you think it's your responsibility to support a moocher, rather than save for your own future, or build your own life, or save money for your own home, or spend your money on travel, or on a housekeeper! I hope this "fun" is worth the cost.

Answer 4

Helping around the house and being fun doesn't put food on your plate. I't's hard enough supporting yourself while in school let alone a freeloader. Sit him down and lay it on the line. You need him to pay half the bills or he needs to move back to his aunt and uncles. Bottom line - sounds like he's using you. Why does he need to be self sufficient when he's got you!?

Answer 5

let him go. that is the only way he will become a man.
You have your future to look foword to and right now is a good time to fix the problem witch is him. If you stay wiht him he will keep you from achieving great things in your life. you need someone that will help you built a great future for your family not some one that will give you a misareble life. make him pay for all his things and the $20,000 loan.
LET HIM GO

Answer 6

Time to grow up. You were nice enough to let him live with you but then he adds insult to injury and has you pay his personal bills to. no offense but he sounds like a free loader. Look like he found a sucker. Have a talk with him now. This man needs a job or the boot. Good luck

Answer 7

GET A JOB! is what I would tell him, i would give him a deadline to start helping or he will have to be living on his own, I'm not saying that you have to quite dating him, but let him know that a relationship is team effort and you are not his mom, so he needs to grow up.

Answer 8

at 19 u are already taking care of a full grown man ??? come on wake up girl and smell the money

Answer 9

He needs to pay his own way - it may be tough but it is the only way he will learn.

You need him to know that you cannot support him or he will always expect you to and then take advantage

Answer 10

I would tell him get your **** together or get out stand up for yourself and dont get walked on like that or do nothing and keep being a door mat!!!