can some one lose the desire to be in love because they have been hurt before?

Question

have no interest at all.

Answer 1

Yea. It is a self protective measure. I can't blame anyone who does that either.

Answer 2

Yes defiantly... have been hurt badly twice and I have now been just over 2 years on my own again(10yrs as a single parent)
It has made me less bothered about the opposite sex, don't get me wrong I miss male company(not just the sex thing) I have just recently I have met what I think is a real nice guy but im so insecure that I may be reading into things too much, dont like that at all so id rather be on my own then get hurt some times, i love love, i love romance like most people in the world but it is hard to find the security in myself to believe in me and give the chance for someone to prove people can be in love

Answer 3

Most definitely - you dont even need to have been hurt by other people either. If the person you are with has constantly done things big or little they eventually take there toll on you.

I was besotted by my boyf for years but have now got to the point where im just not that bothered - if we're together we have a laugh (most of the time) and if we're not, I just get on with other stuff. Gone are the days of spending all the waking hours thinking about boyf ! its a shame really especially as I enjoy his company and he's a really good friend and I do love him just dont think Im 'In' love anymore !

Answer 4

Of course! I've been hurt before and I haven't been out in a date in a good while. I don't hate the idea of being in love; it's the vulnerability that comes along. I just don't want to deal (at least not in the near future) with the hurt and pain. Now, I'm a very guarded person when it comes to relationships.

Answer 5

yes absolutely they can, they loose their hope, because they haven't dealt with the grief they got from the hurt before. when we have unresolved grief it eventually comes out later on in life. it can affect future relationships. my aunt got divorced many years ago, held onto her grief, never remarried after husband left, lived her whole life alone, no kids, she is now 90, became a bitter old lady. asked her why she never remarried, or never had a boyfriend, she blamed it on loosing her husband to divorce years ago, and having no faith in anyone else. but it is not the way to go, when u get hurt u get right back in there, and get a new love. why let a past hurt steal your life, and your future. what was done to u may not have had a thing to do with u. it isn't about the hurt u got, but the way u choose to deal with it. bad happens to us all, people come and go in our lives, just make better choices next time, refuse to be angry and bitter, and go on with your life, think positively, don't keep expecting the worst here.

Answer 6

Yes, I believe so. I was like that, and still am to a certain extent but am trying to work through it. I've grown up a lot from it and learned a lot about myself - I take love a lot more seriously these days and want to make sure I am in love with someone instead of just saying the words because they said it, or you think you are.

Answer 7

Yep, that's a perfectly natural thing to experience. I was really badly hurt and i totally felt the same, over time i became closer to someone else and before i even realised it i was in love again. Your heart will heal, look after it and take care of yourself and time will do it's job.

Answer 8

Happens quite a lot. I am there right now, not due to pain, but in the belief that no one with me could ever raise the bar to the level I had with my ex gf.

I have some interest, but not a lot.

Answer 9

Without a doubt, when you've been hurt the last thing you want to do is be open with someone else. Hopefully, this feeling goes away and the person can try to trust again both someone else and themselves.

Answer 10

I lost it for 12 lonely, untrusting years. Not to say I didn't have relationships with girls, I had many. It was just that I moved on, no matter how much I was keen on them.
Finally found someone who loved me, and showed me how to love again.
I've been with her 7 glorious years now.
Don't give up my friend, the trust, and then the love, will come.

Answer 11

Certainly. Its called "putting up walls". Its understandable, and its normal. However, why keep yourself bottled up when your soulmate is still out there, waiting to be found ? You can be cautious with your heart without being completely closed off. You have one life, and life is too short to be miserable. Get out there, put on a great smile, and show the world what an incredible person you are ! You deserve to be happy !!