I lack femininity and I really want to fix it!?

Question

I've always been a lot of a tomboy. As a child I played football with the guys, cricket, althletics, climber trees and played cops and robbers etc. While the other girls played 'mums and dads' etc.
At 18 I'm finding that I really lack femininity. It doesn't help that I was brought up by my dad with little input from my mum. I like to dress practically as opposed to femininly. I never wear skirts (except for a wedding) and am rarely found in a dress. I only started wearing make up two years ago!
I have been called manly and even confused as a guy a few times! I really don't know what to do about it.
Any tips? Thanks for your help

Answer 1

I wouldn't worry about it. Most of my girlfriends have been pretty much as you describe yourself.

Answer 2

It seems you already know what you are doing wrong. What you are basically saying is that you dress like a guy and want to look more feminine, if you think about it then all you need to do is change what you wear. Wear skirts, dresses and low-cut tops that show off your boobs.
If you want to dress like a guy and look feminine at the same time then you really have your work cut out for you, I don't know what to recommend in that case. I think you should start wearing very womanly clothes.
Also a good idea is to get your hair done in a very elegant style, the hair dresser will help you choose a good one.

I am sure a change of clothes and a new hairstyle will have you looking like a lady and not a lad!

Answer 3

Hi Hun, I think being feminine isnt how you look but how you carry yourself and how you feel.
You can dress practically but feminine especially these days. Theres so many looks in fashion tiday to suit everyone and still be feminine. If your a jeans and tshirt kinda girl you could just accessorise a bit a nice brite scarf or belt, try carrying a nice girly bag and matching shoes(flat ballet pumps are in at the mo) make a statement with colour.If your not keen on skirts n dresses try a short shirt dress over some jeans or skirt with leggins underneath, the possibilties are endles and its just a bit of compromising hun. ask a friend to help you shop and try things on you wouldnt normally stuff lokks different on.lol. dont be scared to experiment. Any way hun good luck hope I was some help to you.

Answer 4

Nurture VS Nature... study...study...study... buy magazines, educate yourself, and develop more "feminine" habits... concentrate on your manners and mannerisms. Above all find a woman that you admire through work, school, social activities that you admire and ask if she would mentor you... Redefining yourself is a huge task, You've already garnered your first success by asking for help... now it's just a matter of applying yourself and working... My little girl decided at the ripe old age of 6 that she was going to be a "Rock Guitarist" so now she has a guitar and lessons... but doesn't practice... (she's soo to be 8) No...there IS a Parallel... she thought it was going to be a matter of sitting down and plucking the strings... after a year of lessons... she realizes that it IS work... So realize early that your going to need to apply some effort to remove some of your "nurtured" programming... and even more work to become the woman you want to be... also... it won't happen overnight... take little steps... and before you know it... You just might really like that person in the mirror.

Good Luck!!!

Answer 5

What is wrong with not wearing skirts? I rarely wear skirts and I feel feminine As for makeup less is more always. Do you have short hair? Grow it out a bit. Is your body type more masculine? If you have a less curvy figure then wear clothing more fitted at waist and avoid pants (jeans especially) with a tapered leg. Avoid high waisted pants. Look for more fitted tops or tops with stitching in the waist. It is hard to help you when I do not know your body type. Go into a store in mall and ask sales people to help you. Avoid stores that work on commission. Find a friend who style you admire and ask her to go shopping with you.
You can carry yourself in a more "girly way" if you are aware of posture and how you carry yourself. Avoid sneakers with jeans and wear more shoes that are feminine. Not just high heels but even a ballet slipper with round toe can be adorable with jeans and SO comfy. Walk with head held high and swing your hips forward.

Answer 6

Uhm this is a diffricult question but....is your hair long cause if not you may want to avoid the short hair cut until your appearance is more femminine so you wont be mistaken for a boy...its ok to not wear dresses, but you can try jeans, with some nice heels, or flat shoes, with a cute belt, some nice ear rings, and a cute shirt...i dont wear dresses often either but i still look femminine you can put certain things together to make it look very sexy without wearing heels, dresses or skirts...you will be fine though its not hard to look femminine just do it..

Answer 7

Ha ha, that was me a few years ago!!!! I found it really hard to try and be feminin, my first move was to grow my nails (used to be a biter), then i started wearing clothes that showed my figure so people knew i was female, i always lived in baggy years prior to that. I rarely wear make up, unless i'm having a night out, and i tend to wear heeled boots with my jeans rather than trainers now. I just like to be comfortable and tarting myself up seems too much like an effort, can't do with these woman that wont leave the house without 'their face on'.

Answer 8

if you really watn to change, dont mak a sudden tranformation. Take it slow. Wear a shirt thats a little brighter than your others one day or a skirt the next. If you take it slow, people will except it. While you're thinkin about that, heres a little fun fact:8 out of 10 Playboy Playmates were tomboys in HS

Answer 9

First thing, as a guy I find healthy, active women very attractive. So, you are in my good books already. As for deportment, you can soften it up a bit by just being more lady like at the dinner table, check out J.Crew - the online clothing shop - they have great looks for women and they are feminine. I say don't kill your sporty, healthy, active side: you will find guys like that. Just realise you got a body that rocks, and that with the right fitting clothes, it will definitely get that message across. Good luck!

Answer 10

i used to be a tomboy...i wear only basketball shorts! my hair is always a mess and NEVER use make up till i was 19!
What you can do is make sure you have a long hair and always try to brush them...maintain them.
If you dont have time to do your make-up, as a girl you ALWAYS have to put on a lipstick....doesnt matter if it's only a touch of lipgloss. (this little things...makes people notice how you are always care about yourself, and 'that' shows how feminine and pleasing u r to people's eyes)
Also make sure you have nice nails..try to go to manicure every week...and if it's too costly...do your own nail...buy a bunch of nail polish in different colors...( i have difficulty with my left hand polishing my right....but u will get use to it after awhile)
Learn women's fashion (read magazines). You can wear your jeans...just make sure to pair it up with a cute top.
Remember: to become a feminine doesn't mean you have to change! you are just becoming 'more' caring towards yourself and others. You dont have to give up your hobbies....I took ballet, hoping to become more feminine, but it doesn't help...plus i hateee it! So i continue to do Martial Arts...and once in awhile i would do my nails and ALWAYS apply lipgloss....the guys always notice different colors of my nails....and they wouldn't treat you like one of the boys...which is nice to experience. Good Luck

Answer 11

You want to ask yourself if you really do want to chance who you are or if you want to do it because you want or feel you have something to prove. Dont you think being practical is a good thing? I wouldnt worry too much. But if you really want to get a bit more lady like then make small changes. Wear some earings, necklace, paint your nails. discover what your assets are and develop them.