My friend found out he has cancer. I need some advice.?

Question

Me && my friend have been friends for 3 years now when middle school started. He always told me I was the girl who brang the light out of him.
But today at lunch he told that he was leaving, to somewhere no one could find him. 20 minutes later he pulled me aside and told me the heartbreaking news. He gave me the letter from the hospital saying he has a rare case of cancer in his kidneys and only has 3 weeks to live.
I really don't know how to handle this. And the people who he has told aren't taking it as bad. Help anyone?

He has gotten e-mails && all kinds of phone calls from his doctor. And he doesn't want his parents to know because he is scared of their greif. So he keeps deleting all the messages. God I just hope he isn't lying, cause if he is that is just going to be just as worse as when he is gone.

Answer 1

This must have been horrible news to get. I'm sorry you had to have a friend in this condition.

There's not much anyone can do when a friend is diagnosed with cancer. I would suggest be there with them, support them, and don't turn away from them. The last days and minutes will reward you when the tramatic time comes.

My hope is that your friend finds help in God.

Again, I'm sorry for your friend.

Answer 2

Yeah... as sad as this tale is, I would question how legit it is. Hospitals don't let you know you're dying from a rare form of cancer by sending a letter. They MAY (but probably not) inform the school by letter, but most likely not.

If I'm wrong, I'm sorry if I'm being insensitive. I never had to deal with that, exactly, so I would suggest talking to your parents, or your school counselor.

EDIT: I came back later and saw what you put in the additional details.

Sweetheart, your friend is lying. If you met when you started middle school 3 years ago, that means he is still a minor. The doctor(s) would tell him about this with his parents present (in fact, they would probably tell the parents first), at the hospital or doctors office. They would not be emailing back and forth. They would be working to find treatment for him, or (if it were true) at least making him comfortable for his remaining three weeks on this planet.

Trust me on this, I have kids, I know kids, and I'm telling you, doctors do not discuss major medical issues with minors without the parents knowing what's going on.

Answer 3

Doctors screw us up sometimes by telling us crap like that. It kind of make illness into a self fullfilling prophecy. Tell him to start taking really good care of himself and get a second opinion. Doctors have no right to give us time limits on our lives. Your friend needs HOPE not a negative doctor. Also ask him if he has a higher power. There is a God and which ever God he choses can bring him hope too.

Answer 4

Maybe they are just in shock and don't know how to deal with the news either. As his friend, all you CAN do is continue to be his friend. Because he needs you now more than ever. Don't let him go off by himself and wallow in self pity. Be there for him. Hold his hand throughout the whole thing. Let him talk. While he doesn't need or want a constant bunch of "insincere" well wishers, he does need someone he can count on to listen.

Answer 5

Oh yes I would talk to his parents to see how you can be helpful. They too would welcome someone that would take an interest and care helping them through what has to be very traumatic event.
Also if he is concocting a morbid scheme for attention or worse this is a sure fire way to find out the truth. Ask him the name of his cancer. YOU don't forget the name believe me. If he tells you look it up and learn about it. If he says he doesn't remember the name be wary that something shady is going on.

Answer 6

Just think of how he might feel. I have been sick, and in and out of the hospital since I was born. Sometimes people get mad at me because I've been sick, and say things they shouldn't say. Just be there for him and treat him like you always did, but also realize that he might be in more pain than you are and may need to talk about it. Good luck and remember there's always hope.

Answer 7

Make the most of the last 3 weeks in his life, for you and for him. I'm not saying "Don't be sad", but let everyday be special. Talk to each other and let everyday soak into your memory, so that you will have those when he is no longer by your side. Have fun!
I know it will be hard, and don't forget to pray for him.
God Bless Him and You.

Answer 8

Wow - that's heavy stuff for two young people. Do you think you could handling being his friend during his final weeks?
And if yes - will he let you be a friend to him in his remaining time? If yes to both of these - you should get some support for yourself. Talk to you mom and dad if you can.

Answer 9

There are two products out there that actually work one is emu gel caps and the other is graviola both can be ordered online or at 416-4668432. I would suggest taking both if time is short. What do you have to lose , just your life.

Answer 10

If your friend has only a short time left then you need to spend all the time you can having fun. He needs to make the most of it. I know it's hard but you need to be strong for him and make sure that you are there to be silly with to cry with or just to be "normal" with. Be strong and you will get through this. My thoughts are with you and your friend.