My girlfriend and I had just started dating but her parents are very strict and they won't let me be with her physically, what should I do?
2007-03-08 06:54:36 · 8 answers · asked by chris 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If by physically you mean far as having sex or french kissing (within the first couple of months of knowing her) I'd strongly suggest you stick it out with her...at least for a month or two. There's a decent chance her parents are just trying to be careful and neither the parents nor your girlfriend are doing this because they dislike you.
If the parents won't let you hang out with her at all, though (which is pretty outrageous/extreme), I'd simply tell your girlfriend "Look, I have to respect myself as well as you...and I deserve to have time with the person who is my girlfriend, regardless of what anyone else says, just as you deserve to get time from me. So if your parents are such a barrier you don't have it in your heart to push past it and spend time with me...then in a couple of weeks I may have to look for someone a lot like you, but without the issues." It's her business (and ultimate choice) to deal with her parents well, not yours, and if you make it yours it will just make you look guilty to both your g/f and her parents.
On the other hand, if her and/or her parents still tend to treat you like an ogre (IE keep the attitude that you're wanting to be physical borders on being criminal), I'd strongly suggest you steer clear.
Beside it not being fun or feeling natural, such long-term fronts could easily be a sign of swindling on the part of your girlfriend (IE she puts up the front, or tell her parents to, because she does want things from you (like money or a marriage certificate), but is not honestly attracted to you)...or simply that she's part of a family with a conflicting lifestyle to your own that will make your life anything but happy in the long-run.
Personally, I've NEVER had a girl who didn't get physical within the first 3 month who wasn't playing games...and a majority of the ones who put up fronts ended up making terrible fun of me for being "ugly" after I refused to be their "dummy" celibate stand-in...well they admitted to having been looked for "real men" to do physical things with while in their "relationships" with me. I could give you a million lines to try and change the woman's mind to be more open about physical relationships but it's not worth it I don't want to give you tips toward "earning" someone who's destined to be abusive toward you.
Honest women want to get physical with their boyfriends and will go the lengths to do so regardless of what their parents think...trust me.
2007-03-08 07:46:43 · answer #1 · answered by M S 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Physically has many meanings, but I think you are implying some kind of physical contact like holding hands, kissing, or arms around the shoulder around the waist kinds of contact. If it is more than that, then it becomes really dicey, with issues of boundaries, limitations and trust. What does your girlfriend say? She should respect her parents but do what she feels is natural, right, and comfortable with you. It is normal for people who date to be somewhat affectionate with each other. These random acts of affection are what make dating fun. While her parents should lighten up, they are who they are.
2007-03-08 15:10:59 · answer #2 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you mean physically as in person or as in sex? If you mean sex then they have it right not allowing it if you guys just started dating but if they wont let you hang out with her or anything it might be very hard to have a relationship. You can always try though. She may be worth the wait!
2007-03-08 14:58:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really care about the girl, then you'll accept her parents wishes and wait until the day you two can be together physically. Think how much fun it'll be when you finally get to be together physically....That much more special I believe. Good luck !!!
2007-03-08 14:58:09 · answer #4 · answered by the_wicked_itch_of_the_west 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
respect that they are her parents. I mean maybe once yall are together for a while they will get over it but just wait it out for a while.
2007-03-08 14:58:51 · answer #5 · answered by cheergirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well talk to her parents and explain that we are in the 20 century.
2007-03-08 14:57:48 · answer #6 · answered by bubblezboo 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Marry her or move on.
2007-03-08 14:58:42 · answer #7 · answered by redhotsillypepper 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
calm ur self man and try sneaking around with her
2007-03-08 14:57:35 · answer #8 · answered by roar!!!!! 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋