my 14 month old gets up all night long just to be cuddled for a min. then off to sleep mins later?

Question

she starts 2 hours into the night and it goes sometimes every 15 mins then a break for an hour then up again... the thing is shes a pcifier baby and has a blaket she HAS to have so i rock her to sleep then in her crib but then its nooooo sleep for the mommy after that... i love to hold her at night but how can i get her to sleep alllllllllll night........... also when she wakes its the deadliest cry ever so i never know what may or may not be wrong

I DID IT!!!!! last night I did NOT rock untill she fell asleep and just as she was falling i placed her in bed.... then she cried.... I let her go for 5 minutes maybe ( as long as I could handle it) BUT when i went in I NEVER picked her up!!! I hugged her IN her bed layed her down then patted her butt as she still cried THEN i left.. I did that 3 times or so... and the last time was THE LAST TIME YIPPPPPY FOR ME SHE NEVER WOKE AT ALL ALLLLL NIGHT!!

THANK YOU ALL

Answer 1

I'm sorry to say, but it's not easy.

As with anything else, there's no one right way to do it, it's not even a choice between two ways. Think of it as a spectrum. At one end is "Just cope with it," (which doesn't sound like it's working for you, and at the other is "Let her scream", which also doesn't sound like it's an option for you. However, there's lots in the middle.

What I would suggest is what worked for my son with getting him to sleep through the night. Slowly wean her of this behaviour. Take two minutes to answer her when she wakes, then three, then four. Or increase by five minutes, or thirty seconds - the longer the wait, the faster it'll work. Slowly decrease the length of time you'll rock her - she'll cry the first few times you put her back in the crib awake, patpat her back, shh her, soothe her any way you can without picking her up. Gradually work towards giving her back her soother and her blanket without picking her up, again, you can take itty-bitty steps, or bigger ones, and the bigger the steps the faster it'll get you sleeping.

Of course, always make sure she's going to bed with a full tummy, make sure the temperature is right, make sure she's safe, keep pets out of her room (fewer awakenings and one thing less to worry about). Are you putting her down for the night already asleep in your arms? If so, that's another thing to work out of - she needs to learn to go to sleep in her crib, that it's an okay place to be.

Hope that helps you!

Answer 2

It could be a security thing. She needs to know that you will be there when she needs you. If you do not come when she cries she may fear that you are gone. It is scary for her. Try getting her to fall asleep in her bed instead of rocking her to sleep. You can not spoil a baby with love. (have there been any changes in the home life- like going back to work, daycare? sometimes stuff like that can create a need for added mommy time). Follow your heart, you will know what is best for you and for her. Good luck

Answer 3

I don't think that it is because she is a pacifier baby. We use to hold our baby ( 10 mos. ) and feed her to get her to go to sleep, and so she got use to that. But then she had to be held all night or else she wouldn't sleep. I know this is going to sound harsh, but we started just letting her cry. We would feed her and then tuck her in bed, but stay close by comforting her until she is just about asleep. And then we would leave. When she woke up, we would go in and check to make sure she was ok, lay her back down, turn on her music, and then leave. If she got up again and started crying, we would just leave her, as long as she didn't get real panicky sounding, we would not go back in. Pretty soon she would calm down, and lay down and go back to sleep on her own. Now don't get me wrong, it is hard on the nerves, the eardrums, the kid, neighbors, ect. ect. But it only took our little girl about four days to realize that it is ok to go to sleep in my bed with out some one holding me. I do the same thing during the day at nap time, and now I don't even have to stay in the room while she is going to sleep. Don't worry, your little girl is just in a routine and if you change it she will get use to the new one too. Then you can finally get some zzzz's.

Answer 4

Well, my little guy used to wake to "snack". I finally had enough and when he would wake, I'd make sure he was ok, then I would tell him it's sleep time. I would do this as many times as necessary (I just am not capable of cry-it-out) and after a few days, he slept on. It worked for us, but each child is different, so you may have to try a few things until you find what works for you and your girl.
You'll get your sleep....eventually!! What ever you try will take some time to work.
Good luck!

Answer 5

I hate to say it, but let her cry. My pediatrician recommended to let her cry for 3 minutes before going in there, next time wait 4, and so on. I know it is hard and it broke my heart when I had to do it, but now my little one sleeps through the night except when she has a bad dream. It isn't a quick solution sometimes, but it works most of the time if you are able to hold up your end.

Answer 6

Well, I couldn't get my 6mth old to sleep thru the night. I finally figured out that he wasn't comfy in his bed. I added padding and he drifted off to sleep. As time went by he wanted to eat... So, I'd feed him just before bath and bed... he'd sleep all thru the night.. Again.. when I put him in a toddler bed and out of mine... He'd wake up wanting in my bed... I put a large stuffed animal that he could curl up around. He's almost 3 now and sleeps thru the night without problems. He's good to go for the night as long as he has something he can wrap his arms around! I hope this helps and all works out for you. I know it can be tough. I don't believe in letting a child cry it out either. I think it's torture to let a child cry and be unanswered. They obviously are in need of something even if it's just comforting !

Answer 7

You need to leave her be. It's ok for babies to cry. She has to learn to pacify and soothe herself or you'll be doing this til she's 10 lol. She needs to be able to put herself to sleep and when she wakes in the middle of the night she needs to be able to put herself back asleep. Try giving her a bath or massage just before bed time to relax her, then lay her down and leave the room. I know it's hard, but if you want some sleep you'll need to give new things a try. Good Luck

Answer 8

Heart breaking to hear your baby crying??? Oh yes, I remember that!

My 11 mth son was doing that, even now, he cries himself to sleep at some nights. I just so want to hug him... can't separate from him, especially, he looks so peaceful when asleep. The end result??? I am just hurting him as much as hurt myself & my husband!!! He doesn't get good night sleep, so are we. He can't function to his fullness during the day, so are we. He developed a sleep association problem, and we became sleepless person.

Using Dr. Ferber's method, we pushed him to sleep thru by himself. NO, this is not an easy method. We tried and failed a couple times. We love him so much that one day, we put down our foot and hugged each other when he cried and cried. Of course, I cried too!

Day 1, he took about 2 hours before he fall asleep by himself.
In the middle of the night, he cried some more, about an hour plus, but each time, he fall asleep crying. My husband checked on him, instead of me as he is more clingy to me.

My husand started with 3 min on 1st visit. Then, 5 min on 2nd visit. After that, all visits are at 10 min intervals. He always has to lay my son down (as my son standed by his crib). Then, my husband stood at his crib level, spoken to my son softyly and gently for 1 or 2 min before he leave the room. My son reaction was cried even louder when he saw daddy.

Day 2, he took about 1 hours before crying to sleep. In between nights, less times but still waking up.
My husband went in after 5 min on the 1 visit, then 10 min at the 2nd visit. And after that, 15 min intervals.

Day 3, about 1/2 an hour of crying to sleep.
My husband only visit at 15 min once.

Day 4, about 15 min.
No visit from daddy!

From then, he cried (until now) when we put him to bed sometimes. But his cry is like a few minutes. AND he sleep thru the night. Some nights, he might wake up and cry a minute or two. But we don't go in to pick him up. He just fall back to sleep.

Please embrace yourself for a week. The early you start with your child, the better and easier on you & her.

You can do it!

Answer 9

Let her sleep with you and then you will get some sleep. And no it won't set up a habit. A deadly cry is usually a cry of fear. Comforting her is the right instinct to have as a mom.

Also try www.askdrsears.com for advice.
He will answer online.

+

Answer 10

my son who is now 17months old was one that would constinly want to be by me he was a preemie so hes attached at times ... well i would put a mommy show like csi on tv .. then i would lay him on his stomach and rub his back he falls asleep . but him to bed .. when he wakes if he wakes give him a little big of water in sippy .. lay him back down and leave the room works everytime other then when sick ..


good luck