How can a soldier go from being praised for violence to living in the return world where violence's unaccepted

Question

If it was your duty to kill people, then how could you even come back to a society where slapping your wife across the face is considered violent?

Answer 1

I simply got of the airplane and thought about how glad I was to be home.

You seem to think that there is some sort of conditioning that makes us 'violent.' There is not. We are simply people with skills in the controlled application of violence.

Clue for the clueless - fighting in a combat zone does not have anything to do with whether somebody slaps his wife.

I have been diagnosed with PTSD from Iraq - and still 'left it behind' when I got on the airplane to return home.

Answer 2

Actually, the ability of a soldier to kill another human being has been the subject of study in military science circles for quite some time.

Evidence from battles ranging from the Revolutionary War, Civil War, and even WWI show that most soldier did NOT in fact, kill anyone. Killing another human being is not an natural instinct that most sane humans possess. Since sociopaths and psychopaths are useless to a modern military, discovering just how a normal, sane person could be induced to kill the enemy has always been something military trainers sought to understand.

It takes several things for a person to be able to kill another effectively, starting with indoctrination and training. The more realistic the training (man-sized and shaped targets, sound effects, visual effects) the more effective it is.
Modern military training addresses this quite well, much better than at any other time in history.

The second thing needed is the approval of a group, and the greater the legitimacy of the group, the closer the group is to the act, and the greater the approval the easier it makes it for a person to kill another. As the military is an entity of the Government, the sole purpose of training to kill the enemy is reinforced by the group, and the unit the soldier is assigned to is nearby and approving of their actions.

The third thing needed is distance. Distance can come in multiple ways, from true physical distance (firing at long range) to mechanical distance (looking through a scope, shooting at a vehicle, rather than crew, use of a scope or night vision device) or cultural distance (dehumanizing the enemy, use of knicknames "kraut, jerry, nip, jap, raghead" or sterile phraseology such as "service the target" rather than "kill the person")

In combat, all three conditions apply, and the soldier is able to overcome the natural inclination of humans to NOT kill another human.

However, back in civilian life most of these criteria disappear. The first condition, the training remains, however the more distant the training was from the present the less effect it has.

Group approval is gone however, as the returning serviceman knows he is not expected to, and is in fact expected NOT to kill or harm any members of the current society. He has effectively joined a new group, that of the civilian, where violence is shunned rather than applauded.
Now not only is the second condition lacking, but is actually being countered completely by the effect of the new group.

The third condition is also gone, as the returned soldier sees the people around him as humans, neighbors, coworkers, family, friends, etc... They simply do not appear as enemies, but rather as part of the new "group" the soldier finds himself in, again having a counter effect to the ability to commit violence.

Answer 3

They aren't praised for being violent. Maybe for saving their fellow soldier's lives - and their own.

It is a kill or be killed there. Some of course have a hard time readjusting - but I'm not sure they all come home and slap their wives around. Mainly I'm sure they are reacting to loud noises and having nightmares and the like.

I know several who've been several times - and his wife heard shots when he had to run for cover - so he's seen action. He acts like the same old guy we've known for 10 yrs.

Answer 4

I can tell you it is not easy, but is is a lot better now then in the Viet Nam era. I came back to Fort Ord CA, to be out processed. It was 1970 and our return was heralded by anti-war demonstrations outside the gates to our post. We were more frightened of the citizens we had fought to protect than the enemy. I simply could not adjust to this world and re-enlisted in the Military just to get away from the craziness.
I now work with veteran support groups to welcome home our soldiers and sailors and assist them in those transitional things. Just the prospect of obtaining meaningful employment has become daunting, and for the ones who are married and have children their needs are even greater. So I say, if we accept them as the heroes they are and welcome them back into society and provide the opportunity they need to assimilate into the American culture, than there wont be any real adjustment problems. Most of the assaults and murders I see are being committed by people who have never served any body but them selves.

Answer 5

Violence in itself has never been praised - violence used to help win a war was praised. Slapping your wife has never been a good thing. This new "rules of conduct" & the stupid press following around the troops & critizing every violent move is new & makes it impossible to win this war or any war. War is about violence & death - it is a last resort & meant to end violence a.k.a. Bin Laden's & Saddam's violence. As a mother of a soldier, i am tired of the allies losing their lives while the press & Congress condem violence & protect the enemies lives.

Answer 6

I being a Vietnam veteran of two tours will give you this advice, seek God in everything you do. Ask Him to enter into your life, and bring about that missing internal peace you will need to live in what is considered the sanity of civilized life. Also obtain counseling, and therapy for yours is a far deeper condition than can be appreciated by onlookers. And when possible seek out, and meet with brethren like yourself who have had your experience, and maybe with a little diligence you'll be made whole again.

Answer 7

A soldier's duty to defend him/herself. If theya re being shot at, what do you expect them to do? Your spouse, male or female, doesn't deserve your anger. They are doing their JOB in Iraq. They don't have a choice. When they come home and hit their spouse (wife or husband), it's out of anger, not duty. To take your anger and frustration out on someone else physically or verbally is wrong, no matter the provacation. One should never lay his or her hands on their spouse in such a manner. Same goes from children.

Answer 8

That is an unfair question. I fought in Iraq, do you think I would have taken someone elses life if I had a choice? The military was suppose to be a job, not a killing machine. You don't know how much I cry everyday about my pass experience. All I was trying to do is make a living. I have gotten to the place that I don't care anymore, I have never believed in violence, but it was my a*s or theirs.

Answer 9

Its easy, the second i got off the plane, back in germany, i returned to the relaxed mode, and have been since. Don't generalize please, dont make it look like we are nothing but mindless killers. Its an effing job, we do our job and go home, thats it. I've been to iraq twice, big deal. I did my duty, than returned home and would never slap my wife. Again, don't generalize, it just makes you look stupid and hungry for any chance to make the military look bad.

Answer 10

you do it one day at a time and remember that you are no longer protected by the uniform that you wear. as an infantryman, i can tell you that the transition is easier said than done. its a daily battle that seems to never end. especially when there are so many individuals out there that need the sort of voilent actions that the soldier can provide.