i need good insults/comebacks?

Question

for a guy who is really mean to me all the time.

Answer 1

Tell him that his birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory.

Tell him he was so ugly when he was born, that his mother got morning sickness AFTER she'd already given birth.

Tell him that he is so ugly, that his mother walks by his Dad every day and says, "Damn! I should have just given you head"!!!

Tell him that his mother is so fat, that she eats "Wheat Thicks".

Tell him his mother is so fat, that when she goes to the movies, she sits next to EVERYONE.

Ahhh....I can go on and on but, I'm sure you get the point! Now go get 'em!!! :)

Answer 2

What are some of the things he says or comments to you? and then I'll be able to give you some comebacks.......
Always say "Tell your mama" with an attitude and in a sarcastic voice. It always works for me with any one and I get a laugh to see how they react......but don't laugh in his face, behind his back or later when you think about it!

Answer 3

When he says something, respond by saying - "your mother."

Or, question his manhood -- imply he's g@y or has a small one.