Planning a proposal; she found my diamond specs?

Question

Okay we have discussed marriage in general terms and would like to get married "someday". But she had found my diamond specs (a couple of bookmarked pages on diamonds in general: like the 4 C's, different types of settings etc.) So now she knows that I plan on proposing soon, and I know that she knows

How do I salvage the surprise of my proposal now that she knows it coming? She only found out about the diamond specs, doesn't know how or where or when.

Answer 1

Well, it may be too late to pull the wool over her eyes....but you can still surprise her. The suprise will now be HOW you are going to do it.

This probably happens more often than you'd think.

All you need to do is come up with some really good proposal ideas, and also, "fake her out".

Plan a nice, romantic dinner, and then act as though you are going to propose. Then either surprise her with....tickets to her favourite concert, etc, or back down and make her squirm a little. Mean? Not really. It will help put back the surprise into "surprise".

But make sure you really do it fairly soon after. Not TOO soon, but waiting too long may cause problems if she expects that it is coming.

You need to do it very casually, such as putting the ring into a hollowed out book that she can open as a birthday present.

Good luck!

P.S. I knew that my fiance was going to propose. Did it ruin the actual proposal? Nope. While I was not as surprised as a could have been, I was and am just as happy!

Answer 2

Don't let it ruin everything, just say something like "well, I know you came across my research, so "here" is the end result -- I hope you like it because I want you to wear it forever and be my wife. What's done is done, don't let it ruin the romance of it. The proposal is something that should be remembered for the rest of your lives, a very very special moment, and it's great to worry about OTHER things such as where and when to pop the question, what music should be playing in the background, what flowers, what wine, whether you will be on a mountaintop camping or in a local restaurant or just having a dinner at home. THOSE are the things to focus on at this point, don't worry about that incident, it's history, make NEW history.

Answer 3

My fiance planned a weekend away for us...A nice bed and breakfast/hotel, the works, in North Conway (NH, shopping central!) and told me we would go shopping all weekend, no complaints from him at all. Well, putting two and two together (at that point, they were already together, I just had to open my eyes) I KNEW he was going to propose that weekend. I always made the plans, and now he was? C'mon. Duh. Well, we ended up going out to eat the weekend BEFORE, and he proposed there. It was great. We were able to spend the week telling everybody in person, then we got to "celebrate" our new engagement the very next weekend.

Alternately, my friend and her husband had planned a cruise, and he made special plans for them to go down early (to FL) to visit her father. She told everyone that this was it, he was proposing on the cruise, going down early to ask her father's permission. Again, a c'mon; duh situation. Well, he got wind of her telling everyone (we all worked together, but in different departments) that this was it. So he didn't do it. He waited until two days after they got back (after they had gone back to work) and proposed when she got home.

Both surprises. Mine a bit less, I guess. But here's another thing: I was completely happy and got to enjoy my vacation whereas she was fretting the whole time and thinking "this is it; this has got to be it. Why isn't he doing it yet?" When she got back home with no proposal and no ring, everyone was still asking her how he proposed...she was miserable, and when he did propose she thought at first it was a joke to show her not to expect things. She yelled at him!

Answer 4

heck you could point blank ask her what she wants and the proposal will still be a suprise. it just means she'll get EXACTLY what she wants. Let time go on and just propose on a normal day. If you really want to put her on edge do a few romantic things and don't propose. That's what happened to a friend. Her now husband did all these romantic stuff and she expected a proposal and then one day he woke her up early and proposed.

Answer 5

Take her out to a very romantic dinner and let her think that you are going to propose. Don't do it! That sounds a little mean but what kind of surprise is it if she thinks it's coming? :-) Then a couple days later take her to the place you met, went on your first date or a place that is special to both of you and do it there. She may think it is coming then but with the fresh memory of the romantic dinner she will be a little more skeptical. :-) Good luck!!!

Answer 6

My Fiance and I designed my ring together. Once I put in my ideas, I backed off and let him discuss the rest with the jeweler. I didn't know how long it would take since it was custom work. A couple months later, we were vacation with his family in PA. We went hiking and he was taking pictures of my two boys playing on the rocks, etc. He asked his brother, who was hiking with us, to take our picture when we hiked up to a small waterfall. He proposed then and got pictures as well! Very nice!! We annouced it to his family that night.

Good Luck!

Answer 7

Every woman knows at one point you want to get married with her vise versa. Its obvious becuase you talk about it. And if you havent you might want to, just in case....

Now not knowing when it will take place, where, who, what ...etc is the exciting part. Just keep her hanging a bit.....

TRUST ME.... if you keep it a secret it will stay secret. WE women always thnk we have it figured out , and when it happens its totally different.

Good Luck

Answer 8

she only knows you were looking at diamonds throw her off by saying or doing something that would make her think you changed your mind. She also does not know when or where. So I would not do it someplace she would expect it like your favorite restaurant

Answer 9

As long as she doesn't know where or when she will stay be pleasantly surprised and on pins and needles until it happens. God Bless you marriage and I wish you all the happiness possible. Good luck!

Answer 10

Don't worry about it, you'll still suprise her.
Mine took me to look at rings because I wanted an Oval and he had no clue what that was..... and I was still shocked when he really did it.