My best friend and I have known each for 20 years, last year she moved in with my ex boyfriend. I had lived with my ex for two years - so he is not someone I casually dated. I don't have feelings for the guy at all, in fact I think he's a jerk. He maxed out all my credit cards and was verbally abusive. I seem him repeating this with her, he's already charged 2 plasma tvs on her credit cards and all new stainless steel appliances for his kitchen. He controls her and its almost like she likes it. They want to be friends with me and my current bf but everytime we hang out, my ex lays into me, insulting me, lecturing me, even tells my ex all these crazy untrue stories about me. What in the heck should I do?
2007-03-08 04:58:28 · 12 answers · asked by Candy H 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The only thing you can, quit putting yourself in uncomfortable positions.
2007-03-08 05:01:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well for starters your friend knew what happened to you in the past so she knew what she was getting into. You should still be friends with your best friend but when she talks about problems with her current bf/ your ex then tell her i'm not going to discuss it with you let's talk about something else. Keep away from couples situations and then you don't have to deal with your ex. Keep your current bf far away from that situation and enjoy your time together with other friends so that your self esteem doesn't suffer. Good luck with the situation and pray for your best friend to wake up one morning and see the way things really are.
2007-03-08 05:13:16 · answer #2 · answered by Sugar 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think I would pull myself outta the situation. You don't need to hang out with them and be miserable when you leave. If you want to keep the relationship with your best friend, do things with her like going out to lunch or shopping or something. If she likes the relationship she is in, let it go. All you can do is support her. But really, you don't need to hang out as couples and put up with the ex. I'm sure your current b/f doesn't appreciate the way he talks to you either. I'm sure he won't mind not seeing them.
2007-03-08 05:06:18 · answer #3 · answered by debrenee211 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been through this before, myself...
Explain to your friend, nicely, that you and your current boyfriend are not really comfortable being around someone who is so negative. Tell her it has nothing to do with her, and that you'll always love her and be there for her no matter who she chooses to date, but you can't keep putting yourself in an uncomfortable situation.
And then...pray she see's the light and dumps the loser.
2007-03-08 05:06:32 · answer #4 · answered by isisrocca82 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Take your friend that you have known for so long, go out for dinner, just a girls night out. Then tell her all your true feelings and how you feel about your ex/ her current boyfriend.... Tell her, be honest in everything you say. Thats all you really can do. and Soon she will find out for herself, you wanted to you could turn him in for abuse, but she needs to be willing to say that, what you are accusing is true also, which could be hard.
2007-03-08 05:02:56 · answer #5 · answered by Skye 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Move on. Be happy with your new bf and stay away from your old one. tell your friend that if you are important to her she will make time to hang with you without him. Explain to her your felings on the situation and hopefully she understands. If she chooses your ex bf over you shes not a good friend and you should leave her behind as well. Put yourself in situations that make you happy and feel good and surround yourself with people who are mature and balanced and make you feel good about you and them. Good luck to you.
2007-03-08 05:05:06 · answer #6 · answered by ByouTfull 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If it were me, and i loved my current boyfriend I'd put my boyfriend's feelings first....
this sounds like quite the dramatic and toxic situation.
i might not cut my friend out of my life.. would still talk with her, if i felt she wasn't disrupting ME.... but your boyfriend has issues in getting together with them.
i can't blame your boyfriend for not wanting to do things with your ex and his girlfriend... your ex doesn't really sound like the type of person who would make a good "friend" or even an acquaintance.
just my opinion.
2007-03-08 05:11:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I didn't read the long sob story but when you have a true best friend, that friend loves you as they love themselves and would never do anything to hurt you!
2007-03-08 05:02:10 · answer #8 · answered by Khalil 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
avoid your ex boyfriend as much as possible and theres no reason to be friends with them. and theres not much you can do about your girlfriend
2007-03-08 05:03:22 · answer #9 · answered by ken s 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Remove yourself from this terrible situation.
2007-03-08 05:04:16 · answer #10 · answered by G-BOY 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋