We have been together now about 6 yrs..We have had some issues during our relationship..We both are, have been jealous of each other, been controlling, etc. Both we both know each other very well...We almost separated 6 months ago, wen to court and all, and we said we would try again...all was pretty good..even in Christmas sent a email showing the Wedding Ring she wanted..Slowly, little did I know, she began to take an interest to someone that worked on occasion for the last 2 months, who lives in North Carolina. She has stressed to me the need for more "me" time but I was having trouble with this...I try to help as much at home..cleaning, p-up kids,. take to school, surprise her with gifts, massages, pampering her any way I could..Saturday the bombshell..She wanted to break up..Tuesday caught her at hotel with this "guy"...I am a shell of a man now..I would even forgive her and take her back...She is who I love truly...But I heard her say "I love you" to this man already...HELP?
2007-03-08 04:42:05 · 16 answers · asked by JimmyV 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I am soooo sorry... I have been through this... actually, I just went through it in the last few months... If you can let her go, do it... Try to go out and explore your options... I know it is hard, but if you don't then you will be like me and have the police called on you... I caught him with my so called friend in Oct. 2005 and I thought I was gonna die... I banged so hard on that metal door I actually dented it... He then moved him in our apaprtment on what would have been our 4 year annv. I went crazy and keyed B**** in her brand new car(which is now repo cuz she got fired cuz of me...TEHE) Come to find out I was pregnant by him tooo... He did not care... Oh yeah she was also married and had 3 kids and went to live with my husband and left her kids and 1 of the kids was not even that guy she left them with.... This girl is trouble... Her name is Julie Born... She is a nasty, dirty walking STD!!!!! Stay away because I know have something that will prob turn into cervical cancer because my husband cheated on me.... Is it worth getting an STD just because of so Called ONE WAY LOVE!!! I dont mean to sound rude... but this is the only thing that got through to me... cuz I went CRAZY!!!!
2007-03-08 04:55:46 · answer #1 · answered by Megan Michelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know I have a simular situation as you going on right now. The woman that I "suppose" to marry is from North Carolina, and she is oving out of our apartment in the beginning of April. I have to start basically from the ground up, except for the few things that I brought when I moved in September. In your case, if there is a three party involved you should not invest all of yor time trying to figure out the real problem with her. It seems like she is need this "me" to see where this other person fits in. Sometimes this is a way to have a breal from a relationship, but sometimes it turns out to be a big mistake on the part of the person who wanted the space. It seems like you are a good man, and you have your head on straight. Do not let this woman be your down fall. When she realize the mistake it will be too late. I was very stressed out when my girlfriend said that she wanted her on place, but I am not down and out because of that.
2007-03-08 04:53:40 · answer #2 · answered by Shawn M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear about your situation. I know what it is to really love somebody but I won't be anybody's fool and neither should you. She promised to give your marriage another try- but did she expect to do it while she's laid up with another man? She may have loved you but it's clear that she has moved on. Don't belittle yourself by taking her back. All the wonderful things you say you do and she still steps out on you. I know we all need "me" time but that is not the same as "me & him" time! As hard as it may be, you have got to let her go and learn to move on. Last Nov-I split with the man that I truely loved too- together for 13 yrs and a 1 yr old daughter. It was tough so I know your situation will only get worse before it gets better. It's men like you that help me realize that I don't need to put up with foolish, hurtful things. There are a lot of women out there, like me, that know the value of a good man because we are good women. Be strong and do the best thing for YOURSELF! Good Luck :)
2007-03-08 05:00:50 · answer #3 · answered by Butterfly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
www.survivinginfidelity.com
there is nothing anyone can do to make someone love, fall back in love, or want another person. no amount of flattery, gifts of any kind should be the way to do so, either - because some people will take advantage of this situation, and milk it for all it's worth.
you need to find yourself again. clearly she isn't someone you can see yourself with.. it is her image and the past memories that you are still hooked on and these are the things you need to focus on getting over.
take your time in getting to know yourself again, and for the sake of any children, be respectful.
However, please don't disrespect yourself any further and remember, by remaining in this relationship is teaching your child that it's OK to allow this type of behaviour and they may mirror your behaviour as an adult.
Good luck & God Bless
2007-03-08 04:52:46 · answer #4 · answered by swilkes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut your loses and move on. It seems you both have tried numerous times to work it out and it didn't work. Am I reading this right that you have a child together? Is this from the marriage era or recently???? The only thing to worry about is the child at this point. Let her go and know that you did everything you could to work it out. Good luck.
2007-03-08 04:47:07 · answer #5 · answered by Me 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People say alot of things that they dont mean....i would really think about what she means to you and the what ifs, like if she is worth all the pain that might happen later. I think its hard to get over cheating but alot of people in relationships do it. I would just think about what "YOU " need. Weight the odds then react. You are the only person that can make that decision, some people stay while others go, but u have to live with it, nobody else. remember that while your thinking.
2007-03-08 04:53:20 · answer #6 · answered by Jazzabell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i want 2 belive that she really may love and that she's just feeling unsure in her life, some men may 'panic' when wedding bells are in the air maybe she's panicking also but doesnt realise it...yeah sure she wants some 'me' time..but i think she justs wants reassurance that maybe a married life with u will be 'peachy'
2007-03-08 04:53:36 · answer #7 · answered by prettypebbles_7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is clear that you two do not belong together, if you really want to be with her you might have to consider becoming swingers, because it doesnt sounds like she is capable of being with only one man
2007-03-08 04:46:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess if it didn't work out the first time ... I won't work out this time... sorry to hear that... but most of the time life has other plans for us.
2007-03-08 04:47:12 · answer #9 · answered by BitterSweet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would just get the divorce it sounds as if she doesn't really care anymore. move on with your life and become truly happy.with someone that wants to be with you.
2007-03-08 04:48:43 · answer #10 · answered by this name 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋