I have an ex husband and an ex boyfriend (have kids with both of them) and am in a wonderful relationship with someone. The problem is, my two ex's will not leave me alone-one doesn't pay child support (currently taking him to court) the other one uses our daughter as a pawn to manipulate me. The bottom line is, they are making me crazy and I feel I am stuck in a hopeless situation. I really don't want my current boyfriend to have to put up with all of this baby mama drama but it seems like every day if it's not one, it's the other causing some sort of problem with me or my children. Please help...
2007-03-08 04:38:53 · 7 answers · asked by Olivia 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
By the way, I have tried to sit down with both of them in a mature, adult way and explain to them we need to focus only on the children but they are both immature, childish, vengeful, hateful men.
2007-03-08 04:40:10 · update #1
Incidentally, Sweet Baby, I was married for 10 years, was on birth control when I got pregnant with my daughter and I am a mature person. As for you-Just A Friend, I posted this question for help, not verbal attacks and don't appreciate your rude comments to me-no one is perfect!
2007-03-08 04:57:32 · update #2
There is no way to sit down and talk to ex's about their attitude. They will never see it your point of view. I only have one ex and I am currently in the best relationship I've ever been in. . . the ex's are jealous when they see some can make you happy and they just try and try to make it hard for that new guy to stick around.
Good luck! I'm hoping that as the kids get older it will get easier but at this rate. . . (7 years later) It seems to be getting more stressful. Hopfully your new man doesn't get scared and take off.
2007-03-08 04:44:00 · answer #1 · answered by Valentina 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you need to get away from this crazies......get a restraining order for both guys....and in any bad situation you can always report them to the police...once you have that piece of paper in you hand you are able to control them more...and about manipulating your daughter?,,,They are alway going to do that and i think it's ashame that they use their own children , but in the long run your daughter will see what's going on ...it's hard cause I'm the same situation and it's hell ,,,except I'm the victim here like your new boyfriend is,,,Hope your new boyfriend won't get tired of this and leave you cause it sure does sux!!,,,,and what ever you do don't use your children cause they are the ones suffering the most....good luck!
2007-03-08 12:55:43 · answer #2 · answered by guess 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
sometimes loving someone just isn't enough when the life we have created for ourselves is a boiling pot of problems we have to come to terms with the facts that it will take a very strong person to stand by us and that type of person is hard to find.i say focus on getting the issues with these men resolved,the court will deal with the nonpaying father with any luck,as for Mr.manipulator as long as he is getting to see his daughter as the courts decided and pays his child support what on earth can he do to make you do anything you don't want to do?its all a power thing and as long as you give them the power to disrupt your life they will continue to do so.
2007-03-08 12:59:52 · answer #3 · answered by patbgone 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You might consider a restraining order concerning how much contact they have with you (limiting it to child visitiation only). If you feel you are being harrassed or stalked you should consider that. If that doesnt work seek the services of an attorney and find out what he can do to limit their contact with you.
2007-03-08 12:48:50 · answer #4 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First you need to realize it's not a "them" problem, but a "me" one.
You wanted these men, you made babies with them, they were like they are at the time (they didn't change afterward), so this is the life you wanted.
The current boyfriend should find someone new as you are right, there is too much drama in your life. However you are someone that pulls drama to them. Haven't you seen plenty of people just like you? Always something going on, someone making their life miserable? It's you, not them.
Fix your own life and these problems will go away.
2007-03-08 12:45:28 · answer #5 · answered by Just a friend. 6 · 1⤊ 3⤋
YOU are not a mature adult person..you've had kids by TWO different men, and now you're having ANOTHER relationship!? I just hope you've had your tubes tied so you don't risk bringing more kids into YOUR hopeless situation.
2007-03-08 12:52:09 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Twinkle♥Toes 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
maybe you should talk to your boyfriend bout this
2007-03-08 12:43:00 · answer #7 · answered by Haley 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋