did i do right? LADIES be honest?

Question

So I went out with this girl few night ago for the first time, everything went fine but I need a womens opinions btw we are in late 20's
when I dropped her off back at her place, it was around midnight during weekday, she asked me if I want to come up, so I told her only if she wants me to come up. This is when she said I don't want to be rude or anything. I asked her if she had any movies we could watch but she didn't, so i told her I'll just let her go to sleep, she had to weak up early for jury duty
she leaned forward to give me a kiss, and so did i but I kissed her on the cheek and I think she was going for my lips ( i could be wrong) but quickly changed directions when realized I was only going for the cheek
I know she is not that kind of a girl that would put out on a first date, and thats not what I'm looking for anyways so don't anyone suggest that
its not that I don't like her, because I do, she has everything I would look for in a girl, but I'm fresh (4months) out of a 5year

relation ship and I think I might be intimidated by the whole thing
I hope she didnt feel rejected, it wasnt my intention.before she left the car I asked her if she wants to go out again and she said sure. I have very strang work schedule and its hard for me to find time
was I right to decline the offer?
What would you girls think of me if it was you?

its me who has strangework schedule, NOT THE GIRL

Answer 1

Initially I would've thought you were fobbing her off when you offered your cheek but, the fact that you asked if she wanted to go out with you on another date, suggests that you want to see her again and that makes it all good.

Don't worry so much....she wants to see you again as well so, if it bothers you too much, just explain to her that you have alot of respect for her and you didn't want to come across too strongly...She sounds like a lovely lady so, I think she'll understand.

You sound like a very respectful gentleman, a rare breed in this day and age.

Answer 2

I think you are doing just fine. If you just got out of a long term relationship you should be taking your time anyway. I think by not going in to her place but asking her out again you are letting her know that you have respect for her and your not only interested in one thing. I would give it 3 - 5 dates before you take the trip into her house. However date #2.......go for the lips!!!!! Good Luck & Have Fun!!!

Answer 3

I think you did the right and respectful thing. If you really like the girl and want to see her again, call her, your work schedule is hard to arrange for another date, explain that to her, but if you really are truly interested let her know you are thinking about her as much as possible without being too pushy. Being back out in the dating world is very intimidating but it does get easier!! good luck

Answer 4

Yes, I believe you did the right thing. If she doesn't know that you got out of a five-year relationship, perhaps you should talk with her. A rebound might make things messier for you and it would be insulting for both parties. I think you have every right to explain yourself.
And at the risk of sounding like a completely cheeseball, I think one needs space and time to decompress from that five-year relationship. Like a healing, period, stretch the muscles and iron things out.
It's good that you're waiting but do talk to her.
Since your asking for honesty, things like that could do things to a woman's self-esteem, subconsciously or not. She might look back at it some day and I think she deserves an explanation.
State your intentions. You're a gentleman. You're a rarity these days.

Answer 5

I would say you did fine though I'm a guy & in a similar spot as you in my past. First dates are usually suppose to be a little ackward & stuff especially with the goodbyes & stuff. I think you shouldnt trip. To me it seems better to be safe & causious then to try to hard to rush things even just a kiss granted she seemed to be going for the lips & she invited you in I would still say that it would be better to do what you did even acting a little shy or timid especially since it was just the first date. Then to try & change going for the lips only to have it be that she wasnt really thinking that & thus you become another guy to eager for sex even if that's not what your after. Alot of guys especially in their teens or 20s are often just after that...Good luck

Answer 6

well I'm glad to hear that you are taken i easy and slow this time because it is hard to get back out there after a long relation ship. so if she doesn't want to understand that then maybe you should keep looking and i know you don't want to just jump back in to another relationship??do you?? just take some time out to enjoy what life has to offer. you can see more than just one person for right now and later on you can choose one over the other. but try not to get to involved in just one person. it's too soon.!!

Answer 7

She's probably taken aback. Thats not typical guy behavior. The more she thinks about it, the more she will appreciate it. Just make sure and give her a call and let her know that you are interested. (don't actually say that). Be up front with herabout your work schedule. You need a gal that will understand and support your work hours, hopefully she will. Good luck to you.

Answer 8

The problem in answering this is it depends on the girl.

I can only speak for myself. I would be rather charmed by the kiss on the cheek. Shows you are a gentleman and they make me melt!
Not going up. It was late so I would have no problem with that especially as you asked her out again. I think you did good. I would go out with you again and ask you up again.

But as I said before, I can only speak for myself.

Answer 9

ok i would be a little upset, but then again u did ask her to hang out again. dont wait a long time to call her up and make a date. if u do she might think ur blowing her off. find out ASAP when u have free time. and when u can hang out with her again, explain to her that u just got out of a 5 year relationship and that u want to take things slow. that u do like her and that u want to get to know her more.

Answer 10

Sounds like you did just fine. Awkwardness always shows up in the early stages, don't be dismayed. Keep in touch with her in between meetings, engage her by asking her opinion on things. Continue to be honest and candid.
Have a star.