some times parents do not understand why there child does not play in many games. I am a coach who wants everyone to get equal playing time but if i see someone working harder then another my first choice will be the hard worker....but i dont think parents want to hear that there child isnt working hard what is the best way to go about a complaining parent?
Thank you!
2007-03-07 13:54:47 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
To anonymous: if you go back and read what i wrote you will see that i said the player who is WORKING HARD not who already knows how to play. Trust me i want everyone to have a far chance, i refused to cut anyone from the team because i believe i need to give everyone a shot.
2007-03-07 14:02:12 · update #1
Practice is the time when i can watch them individually and evaluate how well they are doing or how much they have improved. I am not saying i would not give them any playing time but if that player is missing practice/coming late/not running then yes playing time will be affected.
2007-03-07 14:20:18 · update #2
I am not in this for the money, last year i coached for free and this year i get about 500 dollars for the season so trust me I care about the kids. However i do not think that letting the kids who are not improving and who could be improving play in games would be far to those players who work there butts of in practice.....
2007-03-07 14:25:55 · update #3
thank you for answering i have a better idea of why some parents will question how i handle playing time....
2007-03-07 14:38:31 · update #4
Your best bet would be to have guidelines on paper, regarding practice, games, sportsmanship, and grades. When those guidelines are not met, then playing time is reduced by a percentage of time. Most leagues have a policy of two missed practices mean one game on the sidelines, unless there is a good reason (illness, death in the family, etc)
The fact is that if other players are out to win, it's ridiculous to go on about 'it's not fair' that my daughter skipped practice to go shopping, or didn't do her homework so she had to do it then, she should be able to play in the game anyway. Other players are working hard, and they want to win.
The irony is that some of the names I see have been posting in homeschooling about how homeschooled kids don't get to live in 'the real world' and what a disadvantage it is to them. How real world is it to complain and attack the coach to get playing time? Are you going to go to their first job and say it's not fair they didn't get to do the project they wanted? This is a real good intro to how the real world works.
2007-03-07 17:05:07 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Makes sense so long as you explain to the child as well and give them advice on working harder. I am a teacher and if a child had difficulty but worked his behind off and got a 69, I'd give him a 70, which is passing. On the other hand, if a kid was much more capable, but didn't really work hard, and got a 69, he'd get a 69. Usually, it was the parents of the more capable child who would complain, which is probably why that child didn't work too hard in the first place. Some parents never hear what you have to say unless it's "Johnny is the next Alvin Iverson." They want to hear anything else and they insist that you're out to hurt the kid if you say otherwise.
2007-03-07 14:09:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have 2 boys who are in baseball, basketball and hockey, so I know where you're coming from. I would just try to tell the parents that you and the child are working harder in practice to get more game playing time. If this is at a high school level, I think that parents have to go into it knowing that their child may not play as much as other kids who are better...that's just how it goes. As long as all the kids get some playing time and are not always on the bench, I think that it's ok. I'm sure that you're doing your best! Good luck!
2007-03-07 14:00:20 · answer #3 · answered by Pam R 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No parent wants to hear that their child isn't working hard at something, but you have to be honest. Just tell them, some of the players work harder than others, but they all get to play. When their child starts working harder they'll get to play more too. Thank them for being interested, and suggest they watch a practice or two. I'm mom to 3.
2007-03-07 14:10:02 · answer #4 · answered by Melanie A 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
invite them to a practice, if they already go and don't recognize the fact that their kid is not trying hard, then no amount of explaining in the world is going to help. If you are the coach stick to your guns. Try and get each member of the team involved and having fun, but don't make the kids that are trying hard pay for it.
Also, at the JV level, winning is good, but not everything.
2007-03-07 13:58:46 · answer #5 · answered by John P 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's a public school program. Playing time is not guranteed. It's not your little 1st grade park district soccer. If you want to play at that level then you need to show that you work harder, and play better than everyone else. You have to not only develop skills at practice but also on your own. Tell the parents that if they want their kid to play more, they need to start working hard and getting better.
2007-03-07 15:29:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
OK you need to send a letter home it must be signed by all parents birth step all parents
explaining what you just told us ...and add that bad sportsmanship will cost players play time and not just there sportsmanship but the parents as well
kids sports should not be all about winning but about having fun and everyone participating
2007-03-07 15:02:55 · answer #7 · answered by debrasearch 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is rough, and thanks for caring, as a former coach and player, here goes. When I went out for little leaque in the 50's, I was a late blummer. I had to compete with kids that had afew years under their belts. The coach gave them game time, I shinned the bench. I quit half way through the season. Along with winning, we are supposed to develope these kids. Your delema should you chose to accept it, is to balance the two challenges. Good luck, and thanks for giving.
2007-03-07 14:10:14 · answer #8 · answered by Paully S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're being unfair. Working harder has nothing to do with it. It's not a sweating contest. Who cares if you win the stupid game, you're job is to allow each kid equal opportunity. You're all about winning and that's wrong. It's the weaker, slower kids that need the play time, not some kid who already excels. Why do you even call it working hard? That's no fun. They're chasing a ball around and you want to convert it to work. I'll bet half the team hates you bossing them around. The best way to deal with a complaining parent is to see things their way, not yours, for a change, and stop showing favoritism. After all they're paying your wages and big benefit package.
2007-03-07 14:13:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋
looks like you are doing fine. give them the old bla bla bla. mention that the harder a child trys the better his chances of playing are. if mom and dad don't like it mom and dad can go home and play with the kid.
keep up the good work and thanks for taking your time with the kids!!!
my son did coaching and i know how you feel!!!
2007-03-07 15:52:24 · answer #10 · answered by KRIS 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋