Me and my girlfriend have been going out for over a year. Everything was perfect before i moved 6 hours away. That was over 3 months ago. She has gotten her life on track, going out with friends and other things. Me on the other hand only want to talk to her. I will blow off everything just to talk for a few minutes. Recently she told me how she feels smothered and guilty when she goes out because she knows i do nothing but wait to talk. I am really just afraid of losing her. Even though we have a strong relationship. I just cant shake my insecurities.
2007-03-07 13:11:57 · 11 answers · asked by bosm 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Be less wordy
2007-03-07 13:14:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, If the relationship is as strong as you say, there wouldnt be insecurities. Im insecure and I hate it when I have to work and my boyfriend goes out. and we've been together for 2 and half years. Insecurities are veryyyyyy hard to bust. Truth being that you just want to talk alllll the time is a killer.
Secondly, In my eyes your very lucky she moved away 6 hours. I mean yeah it might suck a little when you wanna see her, but think about it, you have freedom, you dont have to worry about making your day revolve around her, you can make your life, school, work and not worry about trying to fit her in there on a daily basis. Just wait at night when your both settled in for the night to talk about your day. 9 out of 10 times it works better that way, To wait until your both in for the night to talk, because nothing else is going on and nothing can be bothersome. Also everything you could be doing when your normally waiting to talk, can be done because YOU KNOW you'll talk to your sweetie later on.
Good luck sweetheart, and just breathe. I mean she lives 6 hours away give her a little room.
2007-03-07 21:21:07 · answer #2 · answered by Omission is betrayel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to be less needy you have to develop your life where you are now. You did not say if you moved with your parents, if you are a student, etc. If you are a teen, try to join a club at school or befriend more people. You have to stop relying on her for all your social and emotional needs. That is too much for her to have on her shoulders.
If you want your relationship to last, you have to go out and have other interests. Otherwise, there is too much burden for her to carry and you will be depressed, because just having phone calls is pretty monotonous. Go out and have some fun! You can still be loyal and faithful and have a good time, just like I am sure she is doing.
Good Luck.
2007-03-07 21:24:06 · answer #3 · answered by Contessa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And therein lies the problem. You are really afraid of losing her.
IF you have a strong relationship, it will last. But not through you "smothering" her. Relax. If you lose her, than the relationship was not as strong as you believed. Live and let her live. Make a scheduled time to talk and if she "misses" that scheduled time...take the hint. If she cares for you...she will be there.
2007-03-07 21:20:50 · answer #4 · answered by pinkstealth 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should go out and have fun with the people you hang out with and learn more about the world as well as yourself. It sounds like you two DO have a strong relationship but you two have to be strong individually to make your relationship last. She has learned to be outgoing and you should too. I think that because you have been seperated by distance it gives you a chance to learn more. So learn all you can and when you two get a chance to talk you will more to say and you can teach each other more. As long as you two are faithful to one another you two have nothing to worry about. But my advice is to get out and see what the world has to offer. First, you have to step out of your shell. Good luck with that!
2007-03-07 21:23:39 · answer #5 · answered by mamashortydoowop 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to take a deep breath and just relax, if you guys have been together for over a year then it's goin to take alot more than a little move to break you guys up, especially if she loves you. Which i bet she does. But you need to start hangin with your friends and just relax. I won't say forget about her. But don't have her on your mind 24/7. It will drive you crazy if you do, trust me. Don't call her or txt her all the time if you do she will break it off.
2007-03-07 21:20:09 · answer #6 · answered by nana_14 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't literally get a life, she will leave you because it sounds like you are smothering her....sorry to be so blunt. That is hard to do long distances but just try...meet people and go out. If it is meant to be, it will last and if it is not, better to find out now then to waste years.
2007-03-07 21:16:46 · answer #7 · answered by Clarissa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you keep acting like this you will lose her GUARANTEED. think about that the next time you want to blow off something for a 2 min. conversation. Set a time for you to talk and then try to do something you are into like a hobby you have. so that your mind is not always on her. It is time to start enjoying where you live and not always dwell on what you left behind.
2007-03-07 21:20:59 · answer #8 · answered by bubbles 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be true & honest in pure relationship time will come when she will wait for you finding you to be true. Keep on contacting her with few days gap regularly.
2007-03-07 21:16:46 · answer #9 · answered by P S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude she is gone are their not hotties where you live? My grandpa used to say to me a woman is like a sreet car one comes by every 5 minutes1 Enjoy yourself and do not be so uptight1
2007-03-07 21:15:31 · answer #10 · answered by ken j 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋