Is there something wrong with me?

Question

I feel inadequate... Like i don't belong anywhere. I feel as if I lact social skills and it depresses me alot because sometimes I want to be able to talk to people. I mean I can talk to people but then I lose interest after a while. That's why I'm not very close to alot of people. I only have 2 friends that I'm actually close with and accepts me for who I am...But still why can't I just be like everyone else... It's been like that since I was 11 and now I'm 19 years old...
I dont know what to do... I am afraid to get close with others so I'm guessing that people think I am weird or mean or whatever...I feel like people don't want me around or something... and no i'm not suicidal... But I don't understand why I can't just be normal.... It does alot to my psychological health... I don't know I want to say that i don't care what anyone thinks of me, but deep down inside I know that's a lie.... Any advice on what I should do?

And I am also starting to get tired of everything....

Yes, I do fear rejection... when I stray away from others, I don't even realize it... I guess I hurt them when I do that and they think that I am phony when I talk to them when I see them which is like once in a blue moon. I dont know I can't do anything about it. I've also noticed that I am always really angry. At what? I am not really sure to be honest. I have a negative approach towards everything little thing. It's like I hate everything. I don't know, I don't like to be so negative... but i just can't help it. I've been let down alot I guess and I've been through alot. Truthfully, I'm surprised that i am still alive as of today....

Answer 1

Hi. I have had similar problems. It's because I'm different, and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. You don't have to be like everybody else. Maybe you're just a quiet person. I'm quiet AND shy, so you can imagine what my life has been like.

Even if you become uninterested, I suggest you carry on the conversation. I talk to lots of people every day that I don't relate to, and our conversations are very dull. However, I don't want to be rude, so I carry on the conversation. It's hard work (lol), but I'm sure you can do it.

Stop worrying about being so weird or not being accepted. That's your first problem. If you keep constantly worrying about people not liking you, you're going to keep trying to be some way that you're not, therefore you're going to seem awkward. People can sense that.

See, I'm the age that you were when you started feeling left out, 11. I have the same problem because I'm not like the kids in my grade. They're loud, and they are immature. I choose not to be, so I get left out. You may seem awkward or stupid, but you can't help how you are. You may have the same problem. Were you ever very mature at that age? Were you quiet or shy? Were you always worrying about something different from them? That might be why you feel different from them.

If you really have a problem with this and want things to change, introduce yourself to people. I'm guessing that you're in college, so if you don't know someone, talk to them. People LOVE when you're out-going enough to just stop by and say hi. It makes their day.

Also, it doesn't matter how many friends you have...as long as you have them. Stick with your friends, and make new ones as you go along. I hope everything works out okay! Good luck.

Answer 2

You really hit home with me. I know how you feel. I have several official mental diagnosis-Bipolar, OCD, Post Tramatic Stress and Depression.

I also have very few friends and I have a great deal of trouble socially.
However! This does not mean that you are some kind of outcast and that you don't have any hope of a normal life.

You presented a beauitful post here. I think you need to print it out and make an appointment with a Psychiatrist right away!

I can tell by what you wrote that you will live a happy life. the only thing is-well-just like me you might need to take an antidepressant medication, or some kind of meds that a good shrink will give you. You are NOT ALONE! You might also be able to get through this difficult time with some therapy or something too.

I can tell you are a wonderful, kind, gentle person. Please take care of yourself. There is nothing WRONG with you. You just need a little extra assistance with your mental health.

I will be praying for you and i know you will do well if you seek help now ok????

Oh I wish you the best. Pleas Email me someday and let me know what's going on. OK?

You know-another thing is-life is really just damn hard sometimes.

It's not all you! Life stinks sometimes....but I know you will get through!!!!

Please do what I asked?!! OK?

Sarah Jane

Email
[e-mail]

Answer 3

Who says your not normal and what is normal anyhow? There are a lot of people who are different in the world and as far as I am concerned they are what make the world interesting who wants everyone to be the same anyhow.

Perhaps the people you are talking to (non friend people) are not like-minded. The key is finding friends who accept you and who are like-minded and can relate to you.

When I was younger in my teens and 20's I use to try to be like everyone else and fit in and do activities everyone else did and one day I realized life had passed me by and I can spent so many years trying to be what I thought other people were like.

Be true to yourself, you are who you are and you don't need to be like everyone else. I think if you learn to embrace yourself for you you are people will be able to see the real you, not the you trying to fit in and you will attract the right people into your life.

Answer 4

No there's is nothing wrong with you and no one is normal, everyone is different. Get out and have some fun, open up to new people, have your friends introduce you to some of their friends. I don't know if you are at college or working but if you meet people and get to know them you will find they are more interesting than you think. Well not everyone you meet I'm sure but you have nothing to lose. Don't change yourself and become super outgoing but don't be afraid to talk to someone new.

Answer 5

first , be your self,,,an it sound like some where in your life you been hurt,,,,, but you going to learn , people are different, an if they cant take you as your are, well it their lost,,,,an honest we we was all a like, it be a very dull world,,,i under stand where you comeing from, so here what i think,,,ok......... seem like every time you let one get close, they ..one,, leave, 2 die on you,,3 hurt you,,,,,, am i right,,,,so now you built a wall, to keep your self from being hurt,, i know i was the same way, an to a point still ... i,,,am,, i find when i feel some one now getting to close, i find a way, to push them a way,,,but when you realy find the right one, no matture how much you push, they going t be their...

Answer 6

I have no advice, because I feel the same way as you do. Just letting you know you aren't alone. I think I'd be a great person to know if people would give me more of a chance.

Answer 7

dont feel insecure, everybody belongs, you dont have to be socialable Im not. I dont have many friends, but hey Im still happy, go to a library or something - they say thats one of the best ways to meet people who become friends, cause you have same interests BOOKS.... your normal like the rest of us, you dont have to feel that you belong everyone is an individual.....

Answer 8

Before you were created in your mother's womb, God knew you & how you would turn out. You were given the breath of life when you were born, by God's perfect will. Therefore, nothing is wrong. Be yourself & If other's won't accept that, then they don't get to be in your circle of friends.

Answer 9

i have a friend like that its just ur perosnality u can fix it if u really try just be yourself.

Oh and try just one day if u want to to be very socialable and way out of ur comfort zone. if ppl think ur weird when u do that they think u arent weird when ur normal. Hope this helps!!

-KMD

Answer 10

Try new things, get a bf/gf, try not to think about it too much, and try to get your friends to have a high approval of you. It will help boost your self esteem.