So my friend needs help talking to her parents?

Question

Her parents are super strict and they never give her a chance to speak her mind about anything. They never give her the chance to do anything. They pick and choose her friends for her, basically what she wears and everything she does. Even the sports she does and her extracurricular activities at school. She wants to talk to them about giving her more options to do things in her own, after all, it is HER life, not their's. Are there any ways to go about this in a GOOD way, so her parent's don't automatically go "no" and don't even let her express her feelings? How would some of you guys go about this? What would you guys say?

It really IS my friend people. It's not ME I'm talking about. And also, her parent's don't exactly like me, so going over there and talking to them would be kind of bad.

She's 15 years old. Almost 16. In a month and a half.

Answer 1

well strict parents like that probably just want what they think is best for their daughter. The problem is, it's what THEY think is best. What's life if you can't even live your own? She should definitely talk to them, but here are a few tips:

- be respectful, don't act arrogant. Her parents likely know alot more about life than she does

-give reasons why she should be allowed more freedom

-be reasonable, not whiny. Acting like a whiny teenager won't make them more likely to give her freedom.

the best thing to do is keep cool, calm, respectful and reasonable.

Answer 2

I had parents like this and there was nothing I could do to change their ways. I was not allowed to date, go to parties, do any sports/activities they had not approved, go to dances, have friends over and although I was a straight A student, I was grounded all the time. I had to stick it out until the day I turned 18 and graduated high school. After graduation I went home, packed my things and left. After they realized that I left, they asked why and only then were they willing to listen. By that time the damage to our relationship was done, so I did not move back home again.
Your friend can try talking, letters, etc. but if her folks are anything like mine, it wont do any good.

Answer 3

Wow its amazing how this story is exactly the same as one of my good friends!! But now she has really burst out her shell!! What she did was show her parents how all the things that they have done make her miserable, and that she was old enough to make her own decisions ALONE!! So she told them that she will still obey their rules , if they make some changes, like her friends, clothes, curphews!! It works! Once you show your parents that you are understanding to them and give them a shoutout to you r point of view they will comprehend and definetely!! Oh and a little drama helps like a tear or two!!

Answer 4

I would say tell her to write her parents a letter. That way she can get out everything she is feeling and they will not have a chance to shut her down.

Also, writing things down is a way to vent...her parents probably love her so much that they are afraid that she is going to mistakes if she is left to her own decision making. They should let her make mistakes! That is the only way you learn!!

Good luck to you two!

Answer 5

sit them down

and make them promise before hand to hear u out fully before they talk

tell them

that u feel to pressured and like u have no say in anything

and just say u understnad that there ur parents but u want to try to at least pick one activity urself....

and explain if there always doing things for u
what are u going to do when ur older and ur on ur own u wont know what to do

her parents sound like real brainwashers
just tell her to get on the internet and talk to other teens like her
and tell her to go read some library book on social issues etc

so she can decided on her own

my dad is like this
tring to control me
so i talked to him
and i read and go on the internaet alot and just keep my opinions to myself

Answer 6

Your friend should tell her parents to let her make her own mistakes. She knows that they are only looking out for her, and she loves them for it, but she only wants to have a life. Try to explain that she hangs out with good people, and invite them over. when they see how good rheir daughter is, maybe they'll let her make some choices of her own.

Answer 7

Not enough information is this girl 12, 14, 16 or 17?

Answer 8

WHEN DEALING WITH WITH SUPER STRICT PARENT, JUST DO WHATEVER THEY SAID, THEY MIGHT BE SUPER STRICT BUT THEY ARE ALSO VULNERABLE AND KIND HEARTED. WELL IN YOUR FRIEND CASE, THERE ARE PLENTY OF OPTIONS SHE CAN DO ABOUT FOR INTANCE SHE COULD EXPRESS HER FEELINGS TO HER PARENT ABOUT THIS, TALKING TO HER PARENT AND AT THE SAME TIME REMINDING THEM THAT HER FEELINGS ABOUT THE OUTCOME OF THE STRICT PARENTHOOD WOULD DO TO THEIR OWN CHILDREN. GIVE THEM SINCERE THOUGHTS THAT SHE WOULD OBEY HER PARENT REQUIREMENTS AND IN RETURN THE PARENT SHOULD DO THE SAME, GIVE FREEDOM RATHER THAN STRICT RULES AND REGULATIONS. TELL THEM TO WATCH THE MOVIE "PURSUE TO HAPPYNESS" AND RELAX AND NOT TO BE A STIFF PARENTHOOD. THE CONCLUSION OF THIS IS TO GIVE THE BEST SHOT OF YOURSELF TO ACHIEVE THE BEST AND TO RESPECT THE PARENT AND LET THEM KNOW HOW PROUD THAT YOU BE THEIR SIBLINGS AND TO PURSUE TO THE HAPPINESS INSTEAD OF FINDING FAULTS OF YOUR PARENT.

I HOPE MY SIMPLE THOUGHT WOULD BE USEFULL IN YOUR FRIEND EFFORT TO GAIN AND PURSUE WHAT SHE BELIEVE IN HER LIFE.

Answer 9

U could go over to her house with her and talk to her parents with her... that way they might not start to yell cause u r there!

Good Luck!

Answer 10

I would not be afraid to just yell my head off in there face until they listened to what i had to say. I would get so angry if my parents were like this i would probaly destroy everything but i am not telling you to go that far thats just me.