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Hi, I am 16 and I have a major self esteem problem, I feel so ugly and I don’t just mean looks, I don’t have much of a personality either because I am so wrapped up in the way I look, I wear a lot of make-up and spend along time doing my hair and trying to make myself look good, I occasionally get the odd comment from a lad saying I am fit or good looking, but I have never had a proper boyfriend, If I can’t get a proper boyfriend with the make-up and hair styling how on earth will I get one without it, I can’t picture myself with a boyfriend because I feel like I am not good enough for anyone. I can’t just stop wearing make-up and spending ages on my hair because I am so used to it now that I can’t go out with out slapping on a load of make-up and over styling my hair, Most people around me have no idea that I have low self esteem because I try and hide it, I am fake around everyone including my friends, I just don’t know who I am or where my life is going. Anyone advise is welcome??

2007-03-07 07:12:53 · 15 answers · asked by Janey-Wayney 1 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

15 answers

You are trying too hard. Don't be fake, but don't be really depressing either. Self esteem doesn't come from how good your hair looks or how much make up you have on. If you are fake, a guy can see right through that. The right guy will come along and make you feel so great, that you wonder why you ever did that stuff beforehand. Fake gets fake. If you want something that isn't real, then keep not being who you really are. If you want real, be real. That simple. Good luck.

2007-03-07 07:17:53 · answer #1 · answered by KS 6 · 0 0

Before going that route you need to get your mind straight. If you go into a relationship, with all this low self esteem and lack of confidence, unless you are lucky (very, very, very lucky) you are going to end up used and hurt. You are going to look for love in the wrong places and.... let's just say it's a vicious cycle waiting to start. See your guidance counselor or any body you can talk to.

Don't dismiss what that lad told you. If he did not think you weren't good looking, he wouldn't have said it.

And why are you afraid to be yourself? There's nothing wrong with being different- that is what makes you-you!
BTW You're16- what's the rush? You don't need a boyfriend now, anyway?

2007-03-07 07:29:42 · answer #2 · answered by Lisa M. 3 · 1 0

Personally, I can relate to what you are saying.
The last thing I would agree with is being fake.
That will hurt you more than the esteem problems you have will.
I feel there is someone out there for everyone.
You may find them at 16 or you may find them at 30. It doesn't matter. Maybe if you spend less time caught up with your esteem and focused on other stuff (which I know is easier said than done) the esteem issue will slowly drift away.
Keep your head up and don't worry what others think of you, and for that matter, don't let yourself get you down, you only have one life to live. So live it the best you can.
Good luck to ya.

2007-03-07 07:21:10 · answer #3 · answered by Krissy K 2 · 1 0

The first thing you need to do is get rid of that negative attitude about yourself. People do not like being around negative people. The makeup should go to. Guys do no like alot of makeup on girls, they go for the natural look. There is nothing wrong with wanting to look good and fix your hair, but being fake is not who you really are. People finally see right through that and when they do they end up not liking you more. Learn to be yourself and when you do, you will be surprised how many people will look at you different and maybe a boyfriend will be in your future too.
Good Luck.

2007-03-07 07:22:39 · answer #4 · answered by devilgal031948 4 · 0 0

If you need to wear makeup, thats fine. Most girls do. Try really hard to not wear as much though, because you might be one of those people that get more attention when people see the true you. And if people see the true you, then you will probably get more friends and a boyfriend.

2007-03-07 07:19:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

yes. you wanna be more confident, stop wearing a lot of make up. less is more. try to look good but don't worry too much about it. it's what you think and how you want to look. this will give off an idea of your personality. don't worry so much about looking hot, more about looking cool. it feels better. trust me. so for now, give up on huys and concerntrate on yourself and who you are. then you'll be able to convey that through image and attitude and you'll have not only a boyfriend but a long - lasting relationship that will feel soo good.

2007-03-07 07:22:33 · answer #6 · answered by smethansmee 3 · 0 0

Dear, be yourself...we all are beautiful inside and outside, just be you, if you think you aren't good enough for him that's ok, we all think we have some defects in our life style...please, don't put make up, don't care about your hair....trust me, don't put any eyeliner it makes you look like a total whore. Also don't care about looking good, a gut should like you the way you are on the inside.

2007-03-07 07:27:27 · answer #7 · answered by Maya 2 · 1 0

hey don't change to get someone if they really liked you and was worth the time the would want to be with you for you so i think screw the make up and screw the hair i spent alot of my time trying to impress people and it never worked well when i started acting like my self and started dressing and not doing my hair or makeup i started getting more boyfriends then i did when i actually tryed so just be your self an dif they don't like it then they are not worth it ok

2007-03-07 07:20:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 1

You may be to hungry! The guys may feel like you want to eat them for dinner.

Togetherness is about a relationship, so, get goin' with the relatioanship and forget about the boyfriend stuff.

2007-03-07 07:22:54 · answer #9 · answered by ARE BEE 2 · 0 0

If I knew your age it might want to be extra reachable for me to assist. So i will wager that your 15 or 16 a minimum of. initially wait until eventually eventually he ask you to bypass devour pizza, yet when he invites you as a date then he might want to pay for both one in each of you, yet when as pals, then you fairly 2 might want to cut up the bill. the most suitable advice might want to bypass for everybody at any age, infant "be your self, bypass as your self". that is alright to positioned on somewhat makeup, or restore your hair somewhat otherwise, if it truly is a date, then do somewhat extra for your self, yet do not over do it. also for the duration of a textual content chat ask him if he needs to fulfill and chat in individual an afternoon or so before you've dinner or lunch at the same time, there is no longer something incorrect with asking. it can make issues plenty extra reachable to communicate or visit head to head.

2016-10-17 10:56:57 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

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