Marriage counseling before wedding?

Question

Someone just told me you have to get counseling before they will issue us a marriage license? I've never heard of this before. What the heck are we supposed to talk about lol we don't have problems. Well if its true where are we supposed to go to get it done?

Someone mentioned a blood test...what would they test our blood for? STD's or something? lol

Answer 1

This is not a legal requirement. What they were probably saying is that certain religious clergymen will not marry a couple without pre-marital counciling through their religious institution. But as far as getting a marriage license and registering it with the state, you don't need any counciling.

Most states do, however, require both people to submit the results of a blood test to the state for your marriage license. You can get the blood tested by your regular doctor, and he'll sign the forms you need to take back with your mariage license to file.

Answer 2

The marriage counseling basically is a preparation course for marraige. It tells you what you can expect, how to work out problems, build you marriage, raise kids, etc. Some places require you to have this type of counseling- like if you were to be married in a church, but if you were to hire an outside officiant- it isnt always needed.

The blood test isnt required in all states. It is to detect STD's, and establish a blood line (i am thinking it may have something to do with future children as well but dont quote me on that). It really depends on the state you live in.

A better course though i believe that will help all newlyweds would be to take a divorce class- not saying that they will get a divorce, but in those classes, it works out the major problems that the couples faced during the marriage, how to work to gether for the children, and the effects it will have on the family later on. I think too many people jump into marraige without realizing that you will always have to work on it. You dont just get married and then its all Kumbahya- it changes and challenges you on a daily basis. I think with a divorce class it will open their eyes to show them what NOT to do in order so that they can stay together. There are very few things sadder than when you have to take your young children through divorce classes. Work on the marriage. Take the marriage counseling before and during the marriage.

Good luck!

Answer 3

You do not have to get counseled before a wedding. That is not true. It is only a suggestion so you two can talk about how you both feel about things that are yet to come. I feel it is a wise decision though.
My husband and I have survived 2 1/2 years of marriage and I sometimes wonder how. He is from Gambia, West Africa.. 29.. Muslim and a very quiet spirit. I on the other hand am from the U.S... 45.. and Baptist. I believe we have broken the odds. Did I say we were married after knowing each other 90 days? Oooookkkkkkkk?
We fought and argued for at least the first 18 months. After that period we made concious efforts to be more open to the other persons views and opinions. Then and only then did it begin to smooth out. Problems you never knew existed will come out in time. Trust me on that... It could be anything from housekeeping to handling finance. Children to hygeine. Trust the process Honeychild..
I wish my husband and I would have had counseling before marriage. It would have helped immensly with our attitudes and coping skills. Go for it sista! Step out on faith and believe it will all be for the good!

Answer 4

I am not aware of an state that requires counseling before you can get a marriage license. However, there are many churches and many ministers that require counseling before they will agree to perform the ceremony. With the spiraling divorce rate, it is hoped that some counseling in advance to prepare you for the things you will face in marriage may help you. The relationship does not have to be "bad" to benefit from counseling. Even good relationships can get better. If the ministers requires such counseling, he will set up the time(s) and all with you in advance of the wedding. (If you do not want counseling, look for a different minister. Not all require it)

Answer 5

Marriage counselling is like a Marriage Preparation Course. I think it depends on which church you're getting married at. My sister and her husband had a civil wedding last 2005 and they didn't do any Marriage Preparation Course. Now that they're have a church wedding, the church required them to attend a marriage counselling or marriage encounter (i think) course (2 days only).

my fiance and i are getting married this october and our church (catholic church) requires that couples must complete the Marriage Prep Course to be assured that they're really ready for marriage. It's like a six-month course (sessions are held once a month - so there are 6 sessions in total). Attending this course doesn't mean that you as a couple is having major problems in your relationship. this will help you learn how to communicate effectively with each other, handle future problems and learn more about each other and your unique relationships.

With regards to getting a marriage licence, i'm not sure if all registries require that you have to attend counselling before they will issue you one. call them and check to see if they require that so you can go to the church and attend the counselling as soon as you can.

For the blood... i think the reason why they're checking that is because of RH factors (compatibility of you and your future husband or wife) and its just for genetic issues. that's the only reason why i think they need blood tests. (i'm from Alberta, Canada and i haven't heard of blood testing of couples to test for STD, maybe they do it here, maybe not.)

Check with the registry in your place about getting a marriage licence, get the requirements and go to a hospital or to your family doctor and ask him why they do blood tests before the registry issues you a marriage licence. goodluck. i'll be asking my doctor and our registry here ( i wanna make sure too).

Answer 6

I just got married in October and in order to get the license we didn't have to have counseling. We just went to our local courthouse and gave them our information for the license. Some preachers before they will marry a couple will require them to be counseled by that preacher. My husband and I didn't go through counseling b/c the preacher that married us was a family member and knows us really well. I think the main reason for counseling is to make sure that the couples that they marry really love each other, and to stress the responsibilities and problems that you will face. Oh yeah we didn't have to have a blood test either in the state that we live.

Answer 7

The counseling they might be refering to is what you have to go through if you get married in the church. It is not required by the state rather by the church. But each state might be different. Our state didn't require a blood test but I think some do. You should call and check it out. Don't leave it until the last minute. I know with the church you have to do it 6 months in advance.

Answer 8

To get married in a church (Catholic, at least) you have to do a type of marriage counseling before getting married. It's called Pre Cana. It just helps you to see where your fiance is coming from. My fiance and I don't really argue or fight at all, but it was interesting.

Some states used to require blood tests in order to issue a marriage license. I don't think they can, legally, anymore. And, yes, it was to check for STD's....AIDS, Hepatitis, and others.

Answer 9

It may be a requirement for a church, but not a license. If you are getting married in a church, depending on the type, you may have to have up to 6 months of counseling. Usually issues such as family, children, etc., are discussed. As far as blood test, most states do not require this. Check with your local county clerk office to make sure.

Answer 10

The Catholic Church does make brides & grooms go through what is called Pre-Canna (sp?) which is where the church ensures you know what's going on and some people take it like counseling.

As for the blood tests - some states require that before they will issue a license. It helps ensure you know of any genetic problems OR ensures you aren't marrying your long-lost cousin.