Honest ancwers please!!?

Question

I started back to work about a month ago part time working at a daycare. I have a 18 month old girl who has never been in daycare. I work from 1:30-6 in the afternoon. My daughter is normally taking a nap when I was at home when I would be going into work. The past few days I have been bringing her in at 10:30 AM so she can have lunch with her class and go down for a nap there. Do you think I am doing the right thing by bringing her in early or should I spending more time with her in the mornings. (she is getting up at 7 and we spend 3 hours together in the morning and 1-2 hours together at night.) Any advice from moms that went to work after having a kid would be great! I

She is adjusting very well to being there. Doesn't cry for very long after I leave.

Answer 1

I am not a mom though i think you should spend lots of time with your daughter she needs your support and you need to start taking care of her don't spend 3 hours to spend with her spend your whole day she will like that.

Answer 2

I think it is the right thing to do, especially if she gets her nap in. Children that young need their naps and it is even better if she keeps a scheduled nap time. She also gets to eat with the other children which is another great socilization opportunity.

Another way to look at it too is that it also gives you some time to run errands before you have to go to work so when you are off work you dont have to spend that time running around, you will be able to spend it with her.

It sounds like you are already spending quality time with her so it will also make it that more special to both of you. If you keep up with the quality time together, then there should be no worries. There are some parents who spend all day with their child, but spend no real quality time with them. It sould like your child gets the best of both worlds: socializing, playing and learning with other children and a mother that spends good quality time with her. It sounds like she is greatly loved and will be well rounded with the experience of daycare.

Answer 3

I face a similar dilemma with my 2-yr-old. He just started day care 2 months ago, and it has just been the past 2 weeks that he stopped crying when I leave. He sleeps very well there, and he goes down for his nap all by himself (vs. my spending an hour or more trying to get him to sleep). Day cares are fantastic for setting routines, and children thrive on routine--read any parenting magazine or book. It's true. You are simply doing what is best for your child to allow her day to flow well. You can't spend time with her while she's sleeping anyway. I question my parenting choices almost every day, but you have to have confidence in yourself and the decisions that you make. I know this is getting really long, but I think you are doing the right thing for the present time. If you start to notice a change in her behavior at home, you may find that she is rebelling against this new routine. The, by following her lead, you may need to rethink your strategy. FYI-after my son started day care, and I started working a few evenings, his sleep habits (at night) changed a lot. I am really struggling with that right now. He's awake 2-3 times a night. I am going to alter our schedule a little bit to see if it helps. Good luck to you!

Answer 4

Every mother will question every decision they make when it comes to raising their child. Don't worry about it too much, I don't think your daughter will resent you or hate you. You have spent 17 mths with her which is GREAT. Most mothers have to leave their children at 6 weeks or a little later.

You need to break her into a new schedule and how you are doing it is fine ( I think so). If she is not getting too upset and not settling well then you could try and let her have a shorter nap at home and then take her in.

However, you are a GREAT MOM for even caring. Kudos to you.

Answer 5

Bringing her in early was a smart decision. We all know how cranky kids can get if their sleep sched. is off. Most daycares will not be opposed to you hanging out and helping with crafts or other fun things. Its also good that she is spending time with other children her age to develop critical social skills.

Answer 6

There is no law that says you have to spend every waking moment with your child. Mothers have to work and should not feel guilty about it. Daycare is a wonderful experience for a child and she will benefit greatly from it. Quality time with mom is more important than quantity time and if she has adjusted well and likes it, why would you second guess your decision to have her there? All 4 of my kids went to daycare/preschool and it was a wonderful, learning experience for each of them.

Answer 7

Don’t feel guilty for taking her in early. It sounds like a good idea for her to have some time to get used to the daycare before she has to take her nap. It’s also good for her to be socialized with the other kids.

Sounds like you’re spending enough time with her you’re just feeling guilty for working but you don’t have to. It’s okay to work.

Answer 8

Did you know that babies learn best in the context of a one on one relationship with mommy? Drs. Brazelton and Greenspan detail this in their book - the irreducible needs of children.

For children to enter care in their first three years of life is so damaging to their intellect - because they are not with mommy, not in her arms (infant brain cells only form connections when infants are being held!) and because they are so stressed by the separation - cortisol, the stress hormone that floods the brain of an infant crying for mommy, causes depression and anxiety, impairs learning, and causes stress disorders in adulthood for the infant who suffered so.

NICHD studies have found that kids who enter day care before 5 have school problems that persist for 12 years after stopping day care.

Humans are primates. Have you ever observed primates at the zoo or elsewhere? They never put their infants down. That's how ours evolved, that's what they need. Mommy's milk, mommy's arms, mommy's time and devotion.

No early learning center can deliver the goods for an infant/toddler - it's a lie parents tell themselves to assauge the guilt at the egregious behavior of abandoning their children to be raised by hired help - because infants and toddlers need mommy to learn best.

Answer 9

Sounds healthy to me. You are spending plenty of time with her. Do not be such a worry wart. Give yourself a pat on the back!