He retired at the young age of 60 without a plan for his time and is now drinking very heavily and calling at *all* hours every day for 3 months now. I am pregnant and have a 4-year-old, I need my rest! I have family member in the hospital and elderly parents so shutting the phone off is not an option. Being compassionate towards him has not worked, it made things worse, and husband refuses to change phone number. I am angry and I know that will get us nowhere ...any suggestions out there?
2007-03-07 00:10:08 · 6 answers · asked by JenJen 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I guess I should have been more specific in saying that we did set boundaries with him, but he refuses to follow them. Or, he doesn't remember because he's drunk all the time. I appreciate everyone trying to help!
2007-03-07 00:36:56 · update #1
my father is an alcoholic also. for a while we lived in the same town so instead of calling he showed up on my doorstep at all hours of the night. we tried to ignore him but he would stand out there and call my name until i opened the door. very embarrassing. so i had a talk with him and explained to him that i have children and this was very upsetting to me and my children. finally he stopped doing that. as far as your problem, get a caller id or answering machine and screen your calls. talk to him about the problem then don't answer the phone when he calls. if it is important he can leave an answer on the answering machine. a few times of not answering the phone and he will finally get the hint. good luck to u
2007-03-07 00:21:47 · answer #1 · answered by a very happily married woman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Set up designated hours that non-emergency calls can be place to your home (ie. from hours of 10 pm & 6 am NO calls are to be made to our home). If you have a cell phone, tell the family members that only call when urgent, to use that phone during those hours, than shut off the regular phone. Hubby should be setting these limitations, not just you! That, or hubby can sleep in the living room with the only ringing phone right by his side, while shutting the ringer off of any others...bet he will make some bounderies than!
2007-03-07 08:30:14 · answer #2 · answered by MrsJ S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you all have multiple phone lines? Like cells and home phones? If you do one option might be changing the home number and giving that to your family for emergencies and turning off the cell that his dad has the number for at night. Or make your husband sleep in another room with the phone so his dad wakes him up with the calls but not you.
2007-03-07 08:51:06 · answer #3 · answered by Critter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am actually feeling sorry for you , there is no easy answer to this one , your priority is for yourself and the kid/baby , get out of this situation , even if it means leaving your bf , if he see's your vulnerable and doesnt seem to be of any use , try and make the big decisions yourself , but tell him , it comes at a cost - try and see if the potential with you bf , is worth the pain , and if he is trying to resolve anything or create an anwer for you
2007-03-07 08:16:51 · answer #4 · answered by DSV 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your dad that you don't want a baby coming into the world with him drinking all the time. Help him stop and get some new hobbies that he can do with the baby when it comes to the world.
2007-03-07 08:32:02 · answer #5 · answered by froggagoo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can block his number. Since this is your husbands family it is his responsibility to deal with his father!
2007-03-07 08:44:59 · answer #6 · answered by PLDFK 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋