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Hi there, I hope someone can give me some reassurance or advice. Me and my boyfriend bought two beautiful kittens a week ago who were 8 weeks old, and they don't seem to want anything to do with us. I've read tons of advice regarding socialising cats, I've given them their safe room, I try and play with them daily with interactive toys (they're not interested), we've tried to treat them with roast chicken to get them on our laps and we're literally spending all our time trying to get these kittens to like us, just a little bit. We love animals so much, but we're begining to feel like intruders in our own home, they don't want anything to do with us. When we feed them, they just want the food but will walk off as soon as they've had a bit, and they're not really even interested in anything we have to offer. Is there any hope for these kittens?

2007-03-06 09:48:49 · 8 answers · asked by sab01_1999 3 in Pets Cats

Hi again, just to say thanks so so much for your lovely answers.To answer questions, they were bought from a breeder, we met the mum and dad and grandparents who were all healthy, we paid £240 a kitten, but found out when I rang the breeder in tears that they were only handled by her children. We are currently trying with just the one more confident kitty, and she's currently sitting on the laptop and purring, which is a start isn't it??We'll try to seperate them from tonight for an hour at a time, although last time we tried that they cried and it broke my heart. I worry I'm far too soft to train them! Still, we'll persevere every day till we get somewhere I swear. One thing does worry me though, the thought that they'll be disturbed because they didn't get handled when they were tiny ones. Thanks again all, I really appreciate all your help! :)

2007-03-06 11:19:12 · update #1

8 answers

Let them come to you, INstead of rushing to make friends let them decide on when to make the leap.

I had a cat who hated me but i left her alone and she came around. It takes time and i know you want ot cuddl eand love them but just let them do the choosing

2007-03-06 09:54:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I would just sit in one area and watch or observe what they are doing. If you want to actually play with them, just roll one of the toys infront of them and see how they react. When you first get a cat, they might not know you and you should wait until they are comfortable with you. The main thing is give them some breathing space and let them observe what you are doing now and then. If you want, go to the store and buy some cat snacks and see if they would like them. If your kittens like it, they will like you more and you should only give them a little bit of the snacks at the time because they would cost a lot if you bought a whole lot at once. Good luck with your kittens.

2007-03-10 17:51:39 · answer #2 · answered by Roxas of Organization 13 7 · 0 0

Oh sure -- time! At this age, all they want to do is play -- and quite frankly, they make better playmates for each other than you do. This is what nature intends -- kittens practice their hunting skills by chasing and pouncing on each other -- and only kittens (and I feel very sorry for only kittens) end up jumping on your hands and feet, and then people complain that it hurts. Better that they pounce on each other! And then one day, their energy levels will get down to normal, and they'll turn around and notice that they have these wonderful people living with them. Then you'll sometimes find yourself wishing that they'd play with each other, because you'll end up with them sleeping on top of you or craving your attention.

I know, I've got several cats, including some I raised since they were babies. I went through the same experience you did -- disappointment -- and then one day -- and I promise this happens -- you are suddenly the most wonderful thing in their life -- after months of ignoring you. Just enjoy watching them, and get some toys so you can play with them.

2007-03-06 18:08:29 · answer #3 · answered by Corinnique 3 · 0 0

We have 4 kitties and they couldn't be more different. The old guy, the boss, is very confident and the rest of the zoo (also a dog) loves him. Then we have the cute, lovable kitty. Enough said. Then the lone girl kitty, defers to the rest, a little timid at first but very sweet.
And then we have the scaredy cat. He won't hang out with us, hides at the slightest noise, avoids eye contact when we hold him, etc. He will eventually lay across our legs only if he thinks we aren't paying attention, but otherwise has pretty much avoided us his entire life except when it comes to food. I rescued all my kitties from the yard or the shelter at age 2 months or younger, he was one of the shelter kitties I adopted at the same time to keep each other company (other was cutie).
So maybe your kitties will come out of their shell, but they very well may not. Hopefully at least one of them does and I keep my own hopes up that maybe one day scaredy cat will eventually like us, he's about 5 now so it's unlikely but we keep trying.

2007-03-06 20:01:53 · answer #4 · answered by ziglet 3 · 0 0

I'm reading a very good book on cat behavior right now, How To Be a Cat Detective. Sounds like your kittens weren't handled enough by humans during that "crucial" stage, 2 - 7 weeks I think it was? The cat behaviorist who wrote this book has stories of under-socialized kittens. You may want to check out her book - its very good.
In the meantime, ignore them! If kittens weren't handled enough by people early on they may feel stressed by people trying to get close to them, pet them, etc. Unfortunately, I don't think they'll get over it much and may always be distant. Do they hiss and/or growl at you? What does your vet say? You may have to find a good home for these two "loners", together if they like each other, and get yourself a properly brought up kitty. :-( :-)

2007-03-06 18:25:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I think your kittens will eventually come around, they are probably so busy playing with each other that they haven't even noticed you both yet. I have had the youngest cat in my household (she is 7 yrs old now) since she was a day or two old, I tube fed her, bottle fed her and always held her and then all of a sudden she hated being held. Now 6 months later she is letting me hold her and my new husband. Be patient they will come around.

2007-03-06 20:04:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I see you wrote that you "bought" the 2 kittens.
Was it a pet store, breeder, private person?

Did you have to pay a fee at a shelter for adoption services?

I hope you adopted from a shelter.

If you did the shelter/ASPCA/Humane Society thing then you could of picked out 2 kitty's that did not have a lot of human contact before you adopted them.

Unless you were told you don't really know where they came from before they landed in the place you adopted them from.

For whatever reason they needed to forge a bond that seems unbreakable. They obviously felt "threatened" in some way. They need emoitional support and physical support (comfort). Maybe they were abandoned or taken away to early from their momma. Maybe a human was "mean" to them. Maybe they heard or saw something that deeply traumatized them. Maybe their last place "traumatized" them and they need a long adjustment/trust period before they will "open" up to you both on your turf. Your turf, their terms.

It is not the easiest thing to do but with hard work and persistance your 2 little wee ones will come around.

Has it crossed your mind(s) that because there are 2 kittens it will be harder to "socialise" them than if it were just 1 kitten?

Try seperating them during your "bonding" times. If they are not able to "fall back" upon one another in times of their perceived "uncomfortability" IE: play times, lap time, ect. then they will in essence be "forced" to rely upon their "human momma" for that personal contact that "comforts" and/or "eases" their physicall and emoitional "trauma".

They obviously are VERY close and rely upon each other for every comfort there is to be had in life.

They are getting food from you. They know they can rely upon you for their nutrition. It is important to ALWAYS have food/water set out for them. A handfull of dry kibble eases their "anxiety" about going hungry. They need to keep being reassured food wise. That is important. Now you can cross off the "food bonding" portion of your list. That is a major hurdle successfully jumped for you and them.

Try the seperation thing. Bonding apart will be harder at first but more rewarding in the end.
If 1 kitten see's his brother "trusting" you, playing with you, eating from your hand, sitting in your lap, following you, purring for you, ect. He will follow suit.
Cats DO get their clues from one another on how to approach a person/animal that is un familiar to them. If their littermate/friend is "cool" with you they will trust their fellow feline MORE than a human.
He will soon wonder what the deal is with the "human" his bro' is playing with and having fun with.
His "cat curiousity" will force him to be nosey and come over and check out the scene.
Before you know he will be sniffing you and will get closer and closer till you can pet him and give him a treat and he will sit with you and watch his bro' play/bond with you then jealousy will kick in and they will FIGHT for their new "mommy's" attention and treats!

So, win 1 kitten over and the other WILL follow suit. Trying to do both at the same time is the frustrating, long term way to solve the problem. It won't always work either.

Pick the friendliest, most trusting kitten first. Don't let kitten #1 hear his friend/bro "crying" from the locked room during the "bonding/play" sessions. It will be a set back and scare both of them even more.

1 at a time is the best bet.

Good luck sweet pea. Let us know how it works out OK??

I truly want to know how it works out.

2007-03-06 18:41:24 · answer #7 · answered by Spay-n-Neuter-Your-Pets 3 · 0 0

give yourself sometime,treats!also if you pet enough to get kitty to purr then youve won ...keep tryin cats are kinda independent if and when they realise you can do something for them...funny my two cats are so different from each other tiger head buts when i go to bed.boots lee crys till i feed her..they will be better youll see

2007-03-06 18:04:41 · answer #8 · answered by lil pit cat 71 5 · 0 0

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