Considering delaying the start of Kindergarten until my son turns 6...?

Question

I have just found out that my son (turns 5 07/26) does not have to begin kindergarten this year, he can wait until he turns 6. I am thinking this is a good idea for my child... many reasons; he's quite small for his age, very shy, very particular.... likes to watch from the sidelines.... does not like to be dirty (he does not like to paint because of the mess)... He has been in a preeschool for the past two years, and only recently painted his first picture; He is smart, but socially withdrawn. Any way I acknowledge his "quirks", and accept that he is much more comfortable in his own environment.....I think that witholding the start of kindergarten for one year may give hims time to mature/grow. Have any parents done this, what are your feelings?

Answer 1

Good for you! This is definitely the best decision for your son. I have been teaching in a Montessori preschool/kindergarten for over 12 years and in the case of every child who is late summer born or early fall born advise the parents not to send them on. It does not matter what they know academically. What matters most is social and emotional development. Children who start kindergarten early often fall behind. They cry more, have a hard time making friends, playing games, following directions, being on the playground. The other children often see them as the "babies" because they are the youngest in the class. Also, a lot of children who start kindergarten early are held back. They see their peers move on. They feel something is wrong with them because they were left behind.

Over the years I have contacted many former parents who decided to send their child on early. A lot of these children had the problems I mentioned. Every child was held back, most repeated kindergarten, some were held back a grade or two down the road. Every parent who sent their child on regretted their decision!

Also think about his later years. He will always be the youngest. He may not be able to play sports (they have a cut off age). He'll be a 16 year old in high school with 18 year olds. He will forever try and catch up.

These are some basic skills that you son should have before starting school: hold a pencil in an orthodox way, recognize his name, write his name (upper case first letter followed by lower case), know 8 basic colors, cut with scissors, dress himself, take care of all bathroom needs. Here is a link to some more readiness skills. http://www.srvusd.k12.ca.us/schools/REGISTRATION_INFORMATION/KINDERGARTEN/Kindergarten_Readiness_Skills/

Keep him in preschool and give him the "gift" of another year!

Answer 2

No but I wish I would have. My son's b-day is 7/22 and is the same way. We sent him to a private school for 4yr old kindergarten and at the end of the year the teacher suggested holding him back for maturity reasons. I was ticked that she would suggest such a thing. I was thinking that she just wanted the school to get an extra year of money. I changed to a public school and sent him on. Every year it is the same thing, he is always less mature than the other kids and gets into trouble because of it. He doesn't have a problem learning (he is in the advanced classes because of his IQ being so high) he just has a maturity problem. The only thing now is, is that I think it would crush him to hold him back now because he is much older. I really regret not doing it.

I say if you are feeling it is best, it probably is. I regret not doing it. My son does fine now but I think it would be much easier if he were one of the oldest in his class rather than the youngest.

Answer 3

I have worked with many parents who have decided to delay their child's start into kindergarten by a year. I have never had a parent regret their decision to hold their child back, in fact i have only heard regrets when they put their child into kindergarten before the child was ready. If anyone pressures the parents into starting "on time", it's usually the schools. I say, an extra year to mature and become more socially adept may be beneficial. As an aside, (i know you didn't ask about this, but i'm gonna put my 2 cents in anyway...lol), if your child doesn't like touching certain textures (paint), or coloring, etc., he may have some tactile/sensory issues. You can pursue an occupational therapy evaluation to rule this out.

Answer 4

Im not a parent but this kid sounds like me when I was that age. I didn't enter kindergarten until I was 6 either and it was a good thing for me cause I was rather small as well. Being in the environment of public school will bring him out of his shell eventually he has to acclimate to other kids and it might take him a little while but trust me its better than trying to protect him. He needs to learn how to socialize and grow on his own, just be there for support and advise!

Answer 5

My son will be 5 in August (toward the end) and I have decided not to let him enter school till he is closer to 6. My doctor stands behind the decision we believe another year will be better for him because he is on the small side only weighs 33 pounds. This is a good thing and it will mean you have that year to do colors, shapes, numbers, and the ABC's I think in the long run it will benefit your son for less chance of failure in the years to come!

Answer 6

It is your choice you are the mom. He is old enough and has the advantage of two years of preschool. I know kids that have no years of preschool and are going...Register him and if he cant make it then pull him out but the extra year might not really help because his friends will be in kindergarten and when he does go he will be a year behind?

Answer 7

Great thinking mom! Youngest children in school seem to have more difficulties than older children. Letting him mature another year has no drawbacks.