I am not my sister, I am myself and a very responsible adult. My sister is older and extremely controlling. My mom does not treat me bad or try to control me, my mom is very proud of me and my family. My sister tries to control my thoughts or way of life. I am not irresponsible, I am a very good caring person who makes great decisions in life. She can not stand it when I do not think the same way she do, and she hates it that I do not hold the exact same religious beliefs she holds. SHe does everything she can to control me. I am a free person in a free country able to think the way I want to. THe fact is I am so sick of being insulted and treated as if I am one of the most evil person in the world because I do not hold the strict religious ideals she holds. She is so mean and has been and I cannot take it anymore. I try to stand up for myself in the most mature way and in a nice way but she stills finds ways to put me down. What should I do?
2007-03-06 07:27:17 · 13 answers · asked by daisy322_98 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Tell on her to your mom. Or,
Either hit her or tell her to her face she's being a brat.
(hint: The second one will hurt more.)
2007-03-06 07:30:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
OK here is what you do. You are going to modify her behavior. First you are going to have a talk with her when neither of you are angry or rushed. You are going to politely tell her that you expect her to treat you with respect from this day on. And to help her do that you are going to remind her when she does something out of line. When she forgets and starts putting you down you are going to end the encounter at that moment. This means you will hang up the phone, walk out of the room or let her out of the car or get out yourself. Tell her all of this. And when she does it, do what you said you would do and DO IT EVERY TIME. EVERY Time.
In the beginning she will display more of the bad behavior until she is trained. Do not back down, do not be inconsistent. You must end the encounter at once EVERY time. After about 6 months of this, she will change her behavior towards you.
I did this with a friend a number of years ago and it worked great. She treats me well. And about once a year she test the water and I remind her that I will not allow her to say those things to me and she stops for another year.
Good Luck.
2007-03-06 15:59:34 · answer #2 · answered by tonks_op 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes people become religious fanatics. I do not think they do it to hurt anyone, they have found something very special. I do not think they know how to get their point across, and it comes out the wrong way. It is always best to let people make their own decisions about there life style and religious beliefs. Live your own life and continue to make good solid decisions for yourself,. Hopefully, with time she will see you are not doing to badly with your beliefs!!!
2007-03-06 15:47:16 · answer #3 · answered by Lisa L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay, like she doesn't just see things from your perpective or maybe feels you re too young to decide for yourself?
I believe you must have spent years with your sister and at least should be able to find one common ground which you can agree,like her kind of discussions that get her attention easily, try to invest time in doing this as often as possible.
Secondly, you try to understand her temperament or moods for you to find just the right time and place to share with her how you really feel about her in a very relaxed atmosphere,witout anyone getting hurt.
On a third note, maybe you make a rethink on those things your sister may have been hammerin on, drop for as many things or attitudes as possible that could hinder your relationship with your sister and keep a clear conscience, doing evrything to the glory of God
Remain blessed.
dipoexcel@yahoo.com
2007-03-06 16:00:14 · answer #4 · answered by Oladipo B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Smile, give her a hug, let her know you appreciate her concern, and begin spending less time around her. I realize she is your sister, but she is toxic and you should limit interaction with toxic people.
You have to understand why people act like that. We hate in others what we hate in ourselves, so you know that each comment she makes about you is a reflection of how she sees herself. People who act like that are constantly in a negative world. While she may make you feel bad for that moment of your day, she feels and thinks this way every moment of every day. The best thing to do is add whatever positive energy to her life as you can and not give her the opportunity to add negative energy to yours.
2007-03-06 15:34:57 · answer #5 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried telling her how you feel? If you have, try to avoid her and don't feel guilty about it. She's burning her own bridges, and it's self-abuse to keep a relationship with her if she's not willing to accept you. Remember, she's at fault, not you.
2007-03-06 15:31:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get right with God. Go to Church and cleanse your soul. Pray that a large stone drop on her. It is a little harsh but it is the only way to deal with a severe situation. May God bless and keep you. Amen
2007-03-06 15:37:48 · answer #7 · answered by . 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Don't engage in the debate. Just come back at her with a complete non-sequitur.
2007-03-06 15:33:26 · answer #8 · answered by Let Me Think 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like my friend and his brother.
he would contstantly tell his brother he needs to go to church and he needs this and needs that. and he would tell his brother that he will probably see the end of the world and it will occur very soon. and trying to scare him into believing and all this kinda bs.
ignore them.
2007-03-06 15:32:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Explain to her that you're entitled to your own beliefs, and tell her that you don't force her to believe the same things as you.
2007-03-06 15:30:25 · answer #10 · answered by funaholic 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋