Childbirth. Does it hurt?

Question

My wife says giving birth is like sh!tt!ng a football.
I think she's exaggerating to try and get my sympathy, our son only wieghed 13 lb at birth. What do you think??

We'd just like to thank everyone who answered this question, we've been wetting ourselves laughing all night. Some people need to lighten up and take life a little less seriously. Most did'nt seem to notice that the question was placed in the jokes section. A clue maybe??

We'll pick a winner a little later. Cheers to you all, no hard feelings eh!!

Answer 1

I think you're only asking this because you want to show off and wind people up! Try pissing an orange thru your willy, should give you some idea, and thats being generous!

Answer 2

Only 13 pounds??? Only? WOW! Listen to your wife, she is the only one that knows and probably is not exaggerating. Honestly, you have a new son from the deal and your part only took one enjoyable experience, hers on the other hand has been 9 months long. Enjoy the new baby and if she is just saying that for sympathy, no offense, but kind of sounds like you need to be a little more sensitive to that fact that she just gave birth to your 13 pound son!

PS: Congratulations on your new arrival!!

Answer 3

I am sure she is only trying to get sympathy unless you have a really kinky life style. How the hell does she know what shitting a football is like? My wife played with those japanese linked balls and that is apparently great, I'll take her word for it. But footballs?
Boy that is a sign of going where no man has gone before, so to speak.

Answer 4

HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had 2 of the easiest labours in the history of childbirth 1st labour 3hrs 20mins 2nd labour 1hr 20mins no pain relief with either. I was expecting to be like a clowns pocket afterwards but it shrunk back quite nicely- thought I'd share!

To answer you question I have a theory that childbirth is like death. There are no words to describe it. Oh, apart from "Ooooow sh!t bu6ger fcuk oooooooow puuuuuush!"

If you want to experience a similar pain try wedging a pineapple up you hogs eye!

Answer 5

I think this is not a serious question. So, I won't be serious in my answer. Grab ahold of your lower lip and pull it straight out. Then rip it over your head, that's close. Remember besides the birth was the pregnancy-9 months of it. You couldn't handle it.

Answer 6

Its not the most pleasant of experiences..definitely a lot of pain..and yes, u do push as if u have been constipated for several weeks..:-) but what u get at the end of it all is well worth it.. have another 1..;-)

Answer 7

I would say sh!tt!ing a hedgehog football .... oh yes it hurts thats why God made it that the women have the babies or the population would have dwindled by now ....you men could never handle the pain !

Answer 8

i have had 2 babies and it was like shelling peas. and it still hurt like hell!!! and they only weighed 6' 12" my labours lasted for 5 hours on the first and the second for just 19 minutes. respect to your wife.

Answer 9

Iv'e got 2 kids and none of them hurt me but I think that the wife was in a bit of pain.

I didn't want to ask her because she wanted to kill me as it was but I thought that it was easy anyway.

Answer 10

Only 13lb? Tiddler then!

It is the most painful experience known to human kind, of course it b****y hurts!

Answer 11

Your damned right it hurts. If you want to try something similar a grapefruit shoved up your backside should give you a similar sensation.